


Remember me for Centuries

by Miss_Shiva_Adler



Series: THG AU [1]
Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Angst, Arachnophobia, Assisted Suicide, Bittersweet Ending, Blood and Violence, Blow Jobs, Come Swallowing, Consensual Kinky Sex, Dissociation, Dom/sub Undertones, Dubious Consent, Dubious Morality, First Time, Glorification Of Violence, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Head Gamemaker Magnus Bane, Horror, Hurt No Comfort, Implicit ending, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Minor Character Death, Murder-Suicide, Oral Sex, Power Imbalance, Psychological Trauma, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Scratching, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Soft Trampling, Tribute Alec Lightwood, Unprotected Sex, Unreliable Narrator, Violence and Murder, mortification of the flesh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:01:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 29
Words: 88,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21703402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Shiva_Adler/pseuds/Miss_Shiva_Adler
Summary: It's the last year for Alec to compete in the hunger games. There is no way he'll let his one chance to glory slide. Not even Jace will stand in the way. He'll win the games and restore the Lightwood family name. This is a story of violence, growth and pain, of power imbalance and death. And maybe, just maybe, a story on how love at first glance can save a life.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: THG AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1564366
Comments: 89
Kudos: 153
Collections: Best Malec stories, DL;DR: Shadowhunters Fic, Hunter's Moon Fic Recs





	1. Preface

**Author's Note:**

> Update every Tuesday 11pm GMT+1
> 
> Art & Beta'ing :  
> Banner and Alec at the remake center by Michellemisfitx  
> Beta’ing by Ubi and LexioftheDSC
> 
> The twitter tag is #Shivawrites

This fic was originally written for the Immortal bang that in the end got cancelled. So I took my time together with my betas to polish this fic the best we could before sharing it.

Art has been made by Michellemisfitx

Beta'ing was done by Ubi and LexioftheDSC

I wanted to write a serious fic that had deep and meaningful world building with a touch of cyberpunk. I've translated things the best I could into an alternate universe that is different from the Panem we know to something that would fit into a world that is recognisable of a point of view from a lover of Shadowhunters. I have translated things like magic, warlock marks and even races into technological advancements and sorted people into different districts. I had a lot of fun doing that and I hope you will all enjoy and that some of you will pick up some of the easter eggs I have sowed throughout this fic.

I have taken liberties to take as many characters from the Shadowhunters universe both show and books instead of creating OCs. (every speaking character in this fic comes from canon in one way or another) I want to mention that Alec has blue eyes in this fic. There is a (plot) reason for that and I won't disclose that reason until the second installment/fic where it will be addressed in full length. If this is a major dealbreaker for you as a reader then I hope you can make an informed decision on whether or not reading this fic.

There is no homophobia in this fic verse. Only Alec not being very open about his emotions. Some people will look more like how they look in the books (Ragnor fell is green for example) than in the show. When I talk about Sebastian Verlac I mean the actual Sebastian Verlac and not Jonathan Morgenstern. Jonathan does not appear in this first fic.

This fic has an open and bittersweet ending. Be mindful of the Hurt no Comfort tag.

I have created a trigger warning list to help anyone out who needs more details about the possible triggers for this fic. Any questions about tags and trigger warnings can be asked in the comment section. I will give out spoilers if you need it.

Main inspirations for this fic were : The Hunger Games, Dead by Daylight, Tacoma, Castlevania, The Shadowhunter Chronicles, Shadowhunters (TV show), this fic was supposed to be posted around halloween so it's halloweeny as well.

I hope you have a nice reading time and I'm delighted to present to you my Hunger Games AU. I hope you'll enjoy !


	2. Trigger Warning List

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a trigger warning list you can consult at any time, it will contain spoilers so if you want to keep most things as a surprise you can just rely on the tags that I have given. If you want to be sure, aware and prepared then I invite you to read this list. In the overall of this fic there will be mentions of totalitarian regime in almost every chapter and it will be the same for glorification of violence with a protagonist with a dubious/grey morality. The character will evolve from that starting point but his morality doesn't become 'good' all of a sudden. If anything he becomes a different shade of grey. There will be mentions of killing people of all ages (including children) and that from the very beginning. The premise of this story is the trauma the hunger games can infuse. I have done my best to tag everything. I have tried to also list the triggering tags in the way they appear in the chapters. I made things this way so you can consult this chapter page at every possible moment if you wish so. If I have by accident forgotten to tag something or you wish for me to add a tag please let me know. Three pair of eyes have already gone through this fic to tag it correctly. If we have forgotten one it has been an oversight. If you want to ask questions please feel free, I'll answer with needed spoilers in the comment section if it's needed.

Part I – The Reaping

Prologue : Mention of having been in a fist fight, mention of past disciplinary beatings, mention of distant parents

Chapter 1 : Mention of having been in a fist fight

Chapter 2 : Invasive medical procedures, nudity, medical scrutiny, non consensual touching (not in a sexual way)

Chapter 3 : Mention of past character death and of a child character in a coma, mention of drinking alcohol

Chapter 4 : Mention of the intention of killing children

Chapter 5 : Character death in a dream, panic attack, hints toward tendencies of possible self-harm, mention of drinking alcohol

Part II – The Games

Chapter 6 : Mention of child character in a coma, mention of past character death, mention of the intention of killing children

Chapter 7 : Mention of drinking alcohol, mention of past disciplinary beating, mention of past (gruesome) hunger games

Chapter 8 : Small instance of panic (not a full blown panic attack), hints toward tendencies of possible self-harm, mention of (past) toxic relationship, Sex between two consenting adults in a imbalanced power dynamic. Mild kink of trampling.

Part III – The Arena

In this part of the story there will be a continuous mention and description of either glorification of violence and actual facts of violence. Runes are translated as a method of self-harm and it will start from the very first chapter. It will be either be implied/referenced or be in an actual scene and this on a continuous level on every chapter. Murder will also be constantly present as will the element of horror and situation of being scared. Dissociation will happen and Alec will come in and out of dissociation during several intervals assume that all those elements will be present in every single chapter from now on. There are mentions of medical syringes, they are syringes without needles. The main weapon for almost everyone will be knives, throwing knives and kitchen knives. They will not be used for selfharm/drawing of runes on the body. 

Chapter 9 day 1 Part I : Panic attack, bloodbath, murder, violence, self-harm

Chapter 9 day 1 Part II : Murder, collapsing of buildings

Chapter 9 day 1 Part III : Horror, fear, pursuit, murder

Chapter 9 day 1 Part IV : Murder

Chapter 9 day 2 : 2 x Major Character death, Arachnophobia (Giant spider + spiderlings appear descriptively), murder

Chapter 9 day 3 : Mention of self-harm, mention of stalking, horror, fear, pursuit

Chapter 9 day 4 : Mention of past character death and of a child character in a coma, violence

Chapter 9 day 5 : Mention of past character death

Chapter 9 day 6 : Mention of past character death

Chapter 9 day 7 : Mention of fear of being raped, fear, pursuit, violence

Chapter 9 day 8 : fear, pursuit, violence, Minor character death

Chapter 9 day 9-10 : Mention of self-harm, Horror, fear, pursuit, murder, Minor character death, suicidal thoughts

Chapter 9 day 11 : Minor (major) character death, mention of a character with PTSD, self-harm

Chapter 9 day 12 : Horror, body horror (under the form of a creature with unusal features), fear, pursuit, murder, 2 x Minor character deaths, Major Character death, (assisted) suicide (and being forced to watch), self-harm

Chapter 9 day 13 : Major Character death, (assisted) suicide, suicidal thoughts,

Epilogue: Implied/mention of self-harm, mention of suicide and attempted suicide


	3. Cover art by Michellemisfitx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Made by Michellemisfitx on twitter

[ ](http://www.fascinationandfrustration.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/RememberMeCover.jpg)


	4. Prologue

He was pacing, back and forth, back and forth. It was no use. He couldn't stand it. Why couldn't this hour be over already? His sister had been the first to come, excited. He still heard her endless chattering echoing in his head. He had tried to be more stoic about the situation but he didn't make it, his sister's energy was sweeping him off his feet. She had always had a knack for helping him exteriorise his feelings. She always made him smile even when he tried so hard not to. She always helped him to speak his mind as well; to not just follow, but to lead. She had hugged him so tight he knew he would miss her the most for the few weeks to come. His parents were next. He hadn't understood at first why they had decided to come and visit him without Isabelle. But his mother's face, hard and emotionless, made the message clear.

"Almost a pity you weren't betrothed to Miss Branwell yet, it could have been useful," she had said. Her lips were pursed into a thin line. Her severe gaze was assessing his every reaction. She had made him flinch back in his youth. But now he could just mirror her and meet her head-on. He crossed his arms behind his back, showing his obedience; recognition; strength. "I assume you have everything at the ready."

He nodded. "Of course, mother, I've been preparing for this day all my life." She seemed pleased at this comment, had even cracked a smile.

"Makes us proud, son. Being chosen is only the first step, being victorious is what will guarantee you honour and grandeur." Those were the first and only words that had passed his father's lips during the one and only, maybe even last, visit to his son before he was escorted to Alicante. Alec had smiled, another test, he was as ready as he could ever be. He was glad his name hadn't been reaped first.

"I'm here to do what's right. When have I ever disappointed you?" His confident reply made his mother change into a relaxed stance. She had even extended her arms to him, a motherly gesture she didn't indulge in often. Peacekeepers were meant to rule with their heads, not with their hearts. He didn't feel hesitant, nor compelled to refuse her invitation and gladly shared the offered hug.

His parents had left without any more words.

Once left alone he was left waiting again. Of course, they only let in people who were supposed to be close to the tribute. Many of his friends were probably mad at him, he had bested them all so easily... It didn't matter. There was only _one_ person whom still needed to come. If _he_ woke up in time. Alec felt himself scratch the back of his head. He noticed his palms sweating. He fisted his white T-shirt to dry them. Maybe it had been a mistake, maybe he should have let it go. His name hadn't been reaped at all, in all those years there hadn't been any results, regardless of how much tesserae he had taken in secret to increase his chances. Nothing. And no : He couldn't have let it go. He had to do it. No matter how much hate he would get from it. He and his family deserved this more than anything. The hard work he had put into himself and the others had _every_ right to be paid off.

The doors opened. Of course his heart leaped but he couldn't linger on it as two hands shoved him briskly against the wall. The impact of his back colliding with the concrete made a hard sound that almost knocked the air out of his lungs.

"You bastard !" Some spit wetted his face as the words were spewed to him. Of course there was going to be anger. "This was unfair, and you know it !" A guard peaked inside to check on what was going on. Alec looked him in the eyes, not flinching at the onslaught of outrage.

"Release me, Jace, or we'll both get into trouble." The hands on his T-shirt stopped in their tracks and Jace let him go, taking a step backwards. He tried not to linger on how close they had been to one another and how close his best friend's face just had been. He had felt their breaths intertwine with each other.

It had been enough for Alec to feel yearning as if there was no tomorrow.

He waved the guard off. "He won't harm me, he was just upset." Jace crossed his arms over his chest, visibly still angry, resentment painted all over his face in a scowl. The guard nodded and closed the door.

"You knew I wanted to volunteer this year, we agreed you'd help me, you betrayed me," Jace retorted. The fire in his eyes made Alec's inner core shake.

_He loved him, so much_. He just… _couldn't_.

"There was no other way for me, I'm 18, you've got another two years ahead of you, I don't." Jace clenched his jaw, body still tense with anger. His cheek was still visibly red and swollen from the blow Alec had given him to knock him out. Alec knew he should feel sorry… But he didn't.

"It was now or never, Jace," his best friend still didn't respond as he talked, "you know it." Silence fell between them. Alec challenged him in a useless battle of stares. His best friend was upset and his hair was still dishevelled. Alec understood, but regret was none of the feelings he was carrying inside of him. He had made the right choice. They stayed silent just for a little longer before Jace decided to back down.

"I don't want to end up the rest of my life at the quarry." Jace's voice was a bit strained. Vulnerable.

_He loved him, so much_.

Alec shook his head : "You won't end-up at the quarry, Jace, don't be so defeatist." _You're worth so much more_. The sentence was on Alec's lips but he swallowed it in before he would let himself voice it out loud.

Jace sighed, resigned. "I'm sorry, I should be happy for you. You finally get to participate." Alec laughed a bit. Relieved they were moving on. Jace grinned up at him.

"Well, congratulations Alec. I'm super excited to see you play." Alec scratched the back of his head. He tended to blush every time Jace gave him a compliment. Yeah, his cheeks felt hot.

"I really hope that I won't disappoint. I'll win this, but hopefully I will win this in style." Jace stepped up to him poked his ribs.

"Come on, Lightwood, you're top of the class right behind me." Alec took a hold of Jace's wrists to prevent him from poking further.

"Stop it, that's not what I am saying." Jace's smile illuminated him, "You're going to rock this, you're going make us all proud," Alec released Jace's hands reluctantly. They won't be physically close for a long time before he gets back to Alicante. His heart _ached_ for it.

"You have five more minutes," the guard interjected before closing the doors again. Jace turned himself toward Alec and pulled him into a hug. He was tiptoeing since he was shorter than him. Alec felt himself tremble. Just a bit. He fisted Jace's T-shirt. The smell of sweat and overall feeling of warmth of him was overly present, being this close to Jace was… agony.

"You're going to be amazing," his best friend whispered. The hairs on Alec's neck raised themselves, goosebumps forming all over himself. _His heart ached_ _._ He would feel dizzy and almost faint. He could lose himself into this kind of embrace: Forget about time, forget about any place, forget about everything around him. "I can't wait to bring back glory to us all," Alec responded. The warmth of Jace's body against his made him lightheaded. He loved him, _so much_.

"To be able to take care of all of us." _To take care of you_. Jace chuckled. The low rumble in his chest reverberated through his body. Alec inhaled. Jace's scent was killing him softly. Little by little he would lose himself. _He loved him, so much_. His love for Jace would be the only thing that kept him grounded and proud. He would move mountains and live a thousand lives and kill many others. He was in love. So recklessly in love. Which is why he made a stupid decision. Even though his instincts were telling him not to, even when he knew he could have prevented this, he just… maybe… maybe just now… maybe just once... He let his cheek linger against his best friend's face and moved in to kiss him on the lips.

Jace tensed immediately, successfully evading Alec's gesture. And Alec's heart broke.

"Ow," Jace repeated the word three more times before breaking them apart. He held Alec at bay, his hands on his best friend's shoulders.

"I-I don't, Alec… I really don't…" Alec's heart had already pummelled down to his stomach. He shouldn't have done it. How foolish. How careless. How laughable and reckless. He shrugged Jace's hands off his shoulders. They were burning him. If he was able to take an armed beating, he was able to handle this as well. He wanted to die... Of shame.

"It's okay," his voice stammered. He felt his face getting hot. His gut was twisting, his stomach turning into a knot. "I didn't mean to…" he couldn't finish his sentence. His voice died off in his constricted throat. His eyes darted to somewhere else. He couldn't look Jace in the eyes; not anymore. Not ever again.

"I love you, Alec…" He grounded himself, ready for the words he never had wanted to hear being voiced from his best friend's mouth. For the first time in a long time; he was on the verge of tears. "…more than anything." He felt the air being knocked out of his chest. The final blow was always the worst.

"Yeah, I know," was his reply. Bitter. Painful. Hurt. He forced himself to look back at Jace. His best friend didn't look angry or upset, or even disgusted. Jace was just… unfazed. He didn't show anything at all. Which was… good? Jace was just being Jace. And it stung. It stung more than any morning drill or corporal punishment he had ever endured. The door opened, startling the both of them.

"Hour is over, Mister Alexander Lightwood, your train is awaiting you."


	5. Chapter 1

Alec had never been on a train before. He was agitated. He had expected to feel the movement of the whole engine speeding up, but there was nothing of the sort and it was unnerving. He was escorted to the common area of his wagon. Since District 2 was very close to Alicante, the train ride wouldn't take more than a few hours.

At least that's what he thought. He tried to ignore his nervousness toward leaping into the unknown. He really didn't know what would happen next, they didn't give you an extended explanation at the institute when you were training. He exhaled. He was going to be alright. Just needed to get his head less... distracted. There was no space for his feelings right now;

His eyes roamed the room to assess his environment; it looked so rich. The guards shut the door quite loudly behind themselves, which made him tense up in surprise. He was left to his own devices now, which felt bizarre. It was the very first time in his life where he wasn't under scrutiny. Peacekeepers monitored other peacekeepers at all times, and residents were kept under close watch at all times in 2. With defined hesitance he took his first steps forward. Not sure if he felt what freedom was supposed to feel like for the first time.

The brown of the wood was so intense. He had never seen anything alike. He had never guessed it could look like that either. Some parts were even reflecting the artificial light of the lamps around him. It was shining. The structural wood in 2 wasn't remotely like this. It was rough, grey, uneventful, nothing you would look at twice. As he made his way to the table, his sense of smell was assaulted with different odours. He had never seen so much food in one place. Things were oozing, glistening with sauce. He couldn't recognise anything that was displayed.

He didn't dare to touch it, he wasn't hungry. It all looked all very alien to him. He wondered if he should feel sick from it. He was used to the military rations in the institute. This kind of food just didn't look… right. He turned himself away, trying to ignore his curiosity toward the bread roll that smelled of an unknown spice. He moved on toward the couches and interrupted himself mid walk. Drawn into contemplation, the shimmering fabric of cushions was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. The colour was gold and white. It made everything look so wealthy and vibrant. It was overwhelming. He reached out his hand. He wanted to touch it. He had never seen anything alike. It gleamed.

He was interrupted in his gesture when he noticed the redness on his knuckles _-A side effect of punching Jace-_ He retracted his hand, his eyes darting toward the slight swelling. His fingers caressed the area. It was still a little sore. His heart felt heavy. He shook his head, as if to shake off his sorrow. Hopefully they didn't televise his fight. It wasn't the approach he had envisioned for the games.

The door slid open.

He had heard her name, even sparred with her a few times at the institute. Lydia Branwell. Her blonde hair was in a tight braid; she wore the usual white T-shirt and trousers uniform of district 2. She stood tall, proud. She wasn't a person who chatted extensively and preferred the quietness of someone's company, rather than socialisation. She was also very deadly. She had been at the top of 'fastest kill' ranking several years in a row and had beaten Izzy several times during endurance tests.

They greeted each other silently with the engrained military salute. Lydia seemed to then take in the environment just as much as Alec had been. She didn't look as uncomfortable as he had felt. But then again, they were trained to hide most emotions; he wouldn't know what she was thinking until she voiced it herself.

"Is that lace?" she pointed her chin toward the table. Alec followed her gaze. At the end of the tablecloth intricate patterns were appearing from time to time. He squinted, it was indeed lace. He had only seen lace once until today. His father had given it to his mother: a square piece of cloth that had patterns sewn across it, a handkerchief. He had asked his son to keep the secret until his mother discovered it under her pillow as a surprise for her birthday. Alec had never seen it again however. Probably because any form of luxury and contraband was forbidden by the law. He couldn't remember if his father had gotten into trouble because of it. He nodded to Lydia.

"It's lace." She looked excited, still reserved, but a smile was forming on her lips. "I've never seen this before." She approached the table, about to speak again when they were interrupted by the sliding of the opposite door.

"Welcome to the hunger games, I hope you'll have a fantastic stay," Rogerius Starkweather, Hodge, leaned against the door frame; His grey suit was sticking out of the decorum like a sore thumb. Just as much as both of the tributes were. They weren't meant to blend in, and it showed. It wasn't in Hodge's nature to be that sarcastic so he kept silent, Alec observed. Their former teacher, now mentor was pretty disciplinary most of the time. Hodge was probably going to lecture them next. Even if there was something about him that made him look more closed-off than usual.

"Things stop being training, from now on, you're playing the game. Living it. And hopefully one of you will be winning it." Alec shared a glance with Lydia. They knew the odds, had weighed them, betted on them and embraced them. He wasn't scared.

"We've trained all our lives to be here, we're ready…" Lydia shrieked mid sentence when all of a sudden Hodge hurled a knife at her. It lodged itself into the wood of the wall behind her, right above her left shoulder.

"First mistake, you are _never_ ready." Alec smirked at the outraged facial expression from Lydia. Hodge however still didn't look amused. "Don't be so cocky Alec, you wouldn't have expected this knife either." Alec crossed his arms over his chest in defense. He knew better than to interject and argue with Hodge.

"Already terrorising our new tributes mister Starkweather ?" The voice of Catarina Loss rang through the room. Her white hair was tied in a tight ponytail and she had taken off her sunglasses. Her confident stride and the sound of her heels were barely muffled by the plush carpet on the floor as she moved herself into the room. She smelled of cool water as she passed both Hodge and Alec. With minimal effort she was able to pull out the knife from the wall.

"I'm sorry he startled you," she said to Lydia. "He doesn't know how to behave in a civilised manner. Part of the games is also a play of wits and social dances to get you sponsors." She turned herself toward Hodge, in a swift movement she threw the knife back at him, which he caught mid-way. "It's not only soldiers playing soldiers." Lydia and Alec looked at each other, not quite understanding what was going on between those two. Alec was slightly impressed however. He had never imagined someone from Alicante to be skilled at anything but talking in circles about the weather or latest trends.

Hodge cracked a grin: "Now that is settled. Let's move on, shall we ?" He made his way to the table and sat down and poured himself a glass of water.

"First question will be how you both want to be trained. Individually or together?" He drank from his glass and looked at his new tributes, awaiting the usual response. Which he got from Alec: "I don't mind training together, we've been at the same Institute, we've sparred and trained together. I know what Lydia can and can't do. She knows my weaknesses, I know hers." Lydia nodded in agreement and put herself in rest position like Alec. Like the good soldiers that they were.

"We will eventually be each other's killer but until that time comes we will cooperate and work as a team. It's the only way to make sure that no one but each other can stand in our way," she added, perfectly reciting the textbook mentality that Hodge taught all of his trainees. They didn't know anything yet and it showed; "Very well, we have a few hours before reaching Alicante, I propose you eat and we can go over your sponsor approach with Catarina."

* * *

He sat down on his bed, completely lost. Catarina had advised for them to change. This way they could already be more distinctive from one another; Arriving in your district uniform was a bit… 'Mundane', as she put it. Fans and others knew how to recognise a tribute train arriving so he was already on trial for his sponsor approach the very minute they were setting a foot outside.

The first row in the upper part of the closets were suits. They all had rich colours. The kind of colours he would never see himself wear. He took out the jacket that looked patterned with black swirls on a dark reddish background. Was there even a word for this colour ? He looked into the mirror. It was bombastic, too loud, too aggressive. He threw the jacket on the bed. Next one was just the same, the fabric was too soft, too contrasting, too pale. He threw the jacket on the bed. And did the same with the next one; And the next one; And the next one.

The more he searched the more he was convinced he wasn't going to wear a suit. But wouldn't a T-shirt be too plain ? He looked at the other pieces of clothing. They all had those weird cuts and shapes. This one had a hole where his belly button was. And it was held with flimsy shoulder straps. Was this really the kind of clothing people in Alicante wore ? He personally looked ridiculous in it; a knock on the door made him jump.

"Come-on in," he said and Catarina entered his room. Her blue skin looked different in the light of his compartment.

"Sorry for interrupting you while you're changing," she smiled at him, and her friendliness made him forget how lost he had felt a few moments ago. She was surprisingly soft spoken when she talked to him, which was strangely reassuring. "The reruns of the reaping in other districts are playing, since you weren't back in the common room I thought to check up on you. Would you like me to turn around ?"

He had only taken off his T-shirt, so he didn't feel bothered by her being there. He had had military training after all. He shook his head. She seemed to relax at his response. She turned herself toward the pile of clothing on the bed, chuckling. Alec noticed that her silver dress would have been something Isabelle would want to wear. His sister liked tight fitted clothing and gowns. There weren't many of those in 2. "Do you want any help ?"

He wordlessly took a step back so Catarina could reach the closet more easily. She seemed to search for something specific at the back of it. Despite the heels she seemed to be lacking a few centimetres to search through the closet without needing to tiptoe. She talked to herself about sizes, Alec didn't catch what she was saying exactly until she finally took a garment out of the closet. It looked black. And no visible holes were made anywhere.

"Doesn't it look too plain?" He only realised that he had said that out loud when Catarina answered 'no' and that he should try it on.

It was tight, but the fabric didn't scratch or itch at the touch of his skin. Apart from the see-through shoulder pads his whole torso and arms were completely covered. This made him feel at ease. "It's pretty stern, neutral, I think it's what you were going for, right?" He nodded. She dug out two pairs of black trousers and handed them over to him. "See which one fits best and come and join us." She left him alone.

He dressed as quickly as possible. A last look in the mirror had his approval and he made his way to the common area. All of them were watching the television. The screen was broadcasting what looked like district 5. Both tributes look stunned, unable to mutter any words as their pink haired escort asked them a question. The female tribute kept looking at the ground as if to avoid looking at the cameras. Grave mistake, Alicante wanted to see winning smiles or determination, they want to see people being proud to be chosen. Not this. What a pity, last hunger games both tributes of 5 had been in the finale and had died heroically in a fight to each other.

It had been an impressive and thrilling fight. The institute had been analysing the fight in simulation training ever since. The screen queued toward district 6. Alec noticed that the female tribute seemed initially shocked, but then appeared all delight and happiness. She even waved at the crowd enthusiastically. Alec couldn't conceal a smirk. That girl understood what was at stake. She was already trying to win.

"How did the reaping look in district 2?" he asked, tearing his attention away from the screen. Lydia looked up at him. She was wearing a suit but had kept her hair style. "Not bad, you looked determined. The way you made it to the stage without a scratch was pretty neat. Although everyone knows we fight each other before we volunteer."

Relief flooded over him. It meant that they hadn't televised him knocking out Jace. Good. He didn't want Alicante believing Jace to be weak if he volunteered next year. He deserved an equal and even chance to compete without prejudices being thrown in his way. Maybe next year Alec would be the one mentoring him and not Hodge. His heart throbbed in pain at the resurfacing memory of their last interaction. – " _I-I don't… I really don't"_ – That was only going to be possible if Jace ever spoke to him again.

"And you ?" She had done favourably was her reply.

The rerun ended and Hodge shut down the screen and sat back in his seat. He had another glass of water in his hand. "You will have a strong alliance, the boys and girls of both 4 and 1 looked like they have their strategy figured out. It even seems that the ones from 4 are friends with each other. Win one of them over and you'll have the both of them as allies." Hodge hummed and seemed to acknowledge the both of them for the first time in a while. He complimented them on the fact that they looked decent for being on screen. "Next step is convincing the first crowd to cheer you on."

The sun then disappeared, everything felt more muffled. An announcement echoed over the commlinks. They had entered the last tunnel before entering Alicante.

Alec felt tense. Excited. It was hard to describe. He made his way to the windows, waiting for the train to exit the tunnel. Which they did without any more minutes to wait. There it was, the City of Glass. Proud. Exactly how textbooks described it. He couldn't hide it. His wonder, his awe. The sun bathed the high towers in an illuminating light, making the gold and honey coloured stones look translucent as if a sunset was eternally painted over its walls. He never would have thought adamas could be shaped like this. Shaped as something beautiful and not made for war. Alicante was surrounded by water which reflected its splendour all the more. 

The train sped up. He couldn't keep up with the details. The buildings were succeeding each other right after the other. He tried to keep his eyes on the giant statue of Lord Asmodeus which overlooked the garden squares. But it passed just as quickly. They entered another tunnel.

Before he knew it, the cheers were already audible. The crowd. They had indeed recognised the train immediately; Alec took a few steps away from the window, trying to not be seen. He felt trepidation in his stomach. Maybe even a twinge of fear. He looked at Hodge who was scrutinizing him. They didn't exchange words, just a silent glance. He had wanted this for so long. And today… Today was finally the day. It was almost making him feel out of breath. The train stopped and the roar of applause became louder.

Catarina got up and took a last look in the mirror before telling them to follow her. "Chins and smiles up, this is the first look they'll get of you. Make it count." Alec inhaled one last time.

" **Please Welcome, Alexander Lightwood and Lydia Branwell** , **Tributes of district 2"**

The computerised voice echoed and the crowd's chants soared through the station. First it was a mix of their names. He decided not to look at them individually. They were like spots of colours, each one more eccentric than the other. He tried to be as emotionless as possible, trying to kill his fear, the nervousness blooming inside of him. Lydia greeted them with a simple wave of hands. She was smiling, her name resounded in a powerful chant. They made their way further. "Alexander!" A woman, elderly, her green curly hair was so long it touched her feet. "Good luck!"

He turned toward her, smiled and did the peacekeeper salute. This time the chants changed. His name intermixed with Lydia's. Satisfied with the effect it gave he followed up to Catarina who was waving toward the crowd. She seemed very at ease with the attention and even blew a few kisses to the crowd. Hodge laid his hands on both Lydia and Alec's shoulder.

"Nicely done," he told them. "Now, be ready, what's coming next isn't going to feel as nice as this."


	6. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be mindful of the tags in the trigger warning list there will be some non consensual touching and medical scrutiny at play here.

He and Lydia got separated as soon as they crossed the threshold of the remake centre. A group of people circled him, held him by his shoulders, pushed him in the back. The room he entered was white and medical. One person, no, two people seemed to waiting for him. Both men. One had a strange lip and horns which sprung out of his skull. The other one looked more 'normal'. Alec didn't get to say or even think anything. They both led him to the table as fast as possible.

"Undress," the order was clear simple. He complied. But the looks on the men's faces made it clear he was not doing it quickly enough. He started to feel uneasy right when he let his underwear down. It was very exposing. Before he knew it he was pushed down on the table. The coldness made him shiver and blinding light made it difficult for him to keep his eyes open. Hands started to touch him all over his torso.

The horned man seemed to be the one giving instructions while other adhered to the requests. A light blue mist exited from his fingers. The other man's hands then started a series of hand movements and an interface appeared over Alec's body. He had never seen this kind of medical equipment. His feet were touched, his thighs. He closed his eyes, unable to look at the light any longer. The foreign hands roamed over him. He shook his head as if to shake off the unpleasant feeling of being touched all over by unknown people.

His whole body jolted up. His face entered in contact with and went right through the interface. The sting on the inside of his arm disappeared as quickly as it came. "It's just a bit of blood, we need to make sure you don't have any diseases, even though our scanners do most of work, we still need samples nowadays." The more normal looking man was talking, the other seemed to look like he was mentally dissecting his body and completely ignoring the conversation that was happening a few paces from him.

Alec laid down again, he disliked the other tests as well. He was put on weighing scales, got his hair tugged, had fingers in his mouth, had to open his eyes to look in an even brighter light. The weirdest feeling was when they inserted things in his ears. It was uncomfortable. They prodded his skin, used scanning equipment to look at every inch of his body. It wasn't welcome. He was then ordered to stand up. The more 'normal' looking one, the one that Alec guessed was the doctor, left the room. A holopad was clutched in his hands when he did so.

"Hold still."

Alec obeyed. The man took his hands and took out a ribbon from his suit's pocket. He looked at Alec clinically and seemed to be running calculations in his head. He looked young, his dark hair was elaborate and set into an intricate slick swirl pattern. Alec couldn't even imagine how long it took to shape it that way. The horns on the man's skull looked like coloured glass, or was it organic? He couldn't tell and he really didn't want to ask. The most eccentric feature, next to the horns was the man's lip. It looked split but also not, it looked like three spikes grew out of the flesh downwards.

Hodge had told him that people of Alicante had the habit of altering their bodies for aesthetic reasons. Catarina had blue skin and her eyes looked most of the time translucent. This man had had horns implanted and his lower lip was modified. It looked a bit freakish to him. Why would you do this to your body? It was odd. He wondered if it hurt. The ribbon went over his shoulders, around his torso and around his arms.

Alec stiffened when the horned man lowered himself. It almost made Alec gasp inaudibly, when he all of a sudden felt his feet being touch. It took all his willpower not to kick the face right in front of him. He didn't know he was sensitive to that part of his body. Nobody had touched him there before.

He let the man measure his calves and ankles. Until the hands worked their way upward. He tensed when he felt those same hands go around his thighs. There was no eye contact but Alec had to look away. He had never been so close to anybody. Even getting undressed while Jace was in the room felt less embarrassing. He gulped down when the hands went around his waist and the man was kneeling right in front of him. He exhaled through his nose as soundlessly as possible.

This… This wasn't going well. The warmth of the touch, the tracing of fingers. A man who wasn't bad looking, who was looking at him or his body rather intensely. If he paid attention he could even feel a bit of the man's breathing on his skin.

With cringe and exasperation he noticed his bodily reactions working their way to his brain. He bit the inside of his cheek, trying to focus on the grinding of his teeth into his flesh, focus his breathing. By the Angels and Demons alike this couldn't be happening. The more time it took the more he felt betrayed by his body. The base of the palm was used to flatten the ribbon. A slight scratch of nails.

He opened his eyes and blinked rapidly.

This was a _mess_ , he felt like a mess. He had never been touched that way on his naked skin before. And he hated the fact that it was happening in such manner. He flexed his hand. Exhaled slowly again. He tried to keep his mind blank. There was a tug on the ribbon. This… wasn't going well for him; not going well _at all._

The man stood back up. Alec fluttered his eyes open, he hadn't even realised he had closed them. His cheeks felt like they were burning up. "All set, we can proceed to cleaning you up now." It wasn't over, clearly. Why ? He didn't voice it. Of course he knew why. He went back on the table, not sure if he had made the right decision by doing so. His legs were trembling a bit, his nerves were frayed. "This is going to hurt," said the horned man and Alec nodded as he laid down, seriously underestimating how different that kind of pain was going to be.

* * *

He was given a robe, it felt like water on his skin. He could have relished in the feeling if it hadn't been so invasive. Alicante liked things, people, devoid of any hairs apparently. It didn't feel right. His armpits felt so foreign to him just as much as his chest. Even down _there_. He closed the robe more firmly around his waist. For the very first time since his ascension started, he felt like he didn't want to be here. He wanted to be going home.

He sat down at the window balcony overlooking Alicante. They had brought him to an adjacent room, told him to wait. And had been waiting since. He didn't know how long he had been here. It felt like hours already. All of the other tributes must have arrived as well in the meantime. He had seen some other trains enter the station in the distance.

He let his mind wander, remembering Jace and how only this morning they had been together on their morning run with the others. They had bested all the other trainees once again. Izzy had arrived a few moments later and they had snuck away to the roof of the institute to watch how the stage in the town's square was being built. Jace had been so joyful, excited, kept announcing how he was going to volunteer this time. He looked illustrious, the sun shone through his hair and his dazzling smile had left an imprint on Alec's soul. Izzy had announced she was hoping to go next year; she wanted to get to the top ranking of 'most kills' first, right now she only ranked as third.

Alec had kept quiet, knowing that he would have to make the hard choices once the volunteering happened. He had watched them, joked with them, had hugged them in comfort. They had felt unbreakable, the three of them. Tied to each other more than just the water of the womb and their names. They were a strength, a powerful triad ready to take on the world. Even if Alec had lied to them and made a decision that affected all of them. They had understood and both had come to say their goodbyes.

He felt himself relax, he wanted this; he was fearless, he was here to bring glory and honour to his family. They were going to be proud of him. The door opened. Alec stood up. The intruder was yet another man. He was taller than him. Alec guessed in his late thirties. Just like the other man from earlier, horns were protruding from his skull, however they were bigger and more imposing. His skin was a dark shade of green, like the moss that sometimes grew on the stone of the quarries. His beaming smile was brighter than anything Alec had ever seen. "My apologies for the delay. I had to make some adjustments on Lydia's robe. Your name is Alexander, right ?"

"I prefer to be called Alec," he replied. The man seemed to indulge in his request. "Nice to meet you Alec, my name is Ragnor Fell, head stylist for district 2." He walked over to him and extended a hand. Alec didn't know what to do with it.

"You're supposed to shake it." Oh. He took the man's wrist and shook it. Ragnor seemed to laugh at that. Alec pursed his lips. What was so funny ? He just did what he was asked. Ragnor put their hands against each other and enclosed his fingers around Alec's hand. The stylist smirked up at him.

"Sorry, it cracks me up every time. We're less formal here in Alicante. We shake hands and if you're closer to one another we even greet each other with a kiss or a hug." He let Alec's hand go. They had all kinds of greetings in district 2, a hand wave, military salutes, a distinct one for people you considered or were family of and a few others for when one was in mourning or getting married. Kisses and hugs were only permitted for the ones you were extremely close to.

"Let's get started, we've lost much time as it is. Elias !" The door opened and the same horned young man from earlier came inside, dragging a few cloaked pieces of clothing along. Behind him there were several carts seeming to move on their own. Ragnor did a series of hand movements, different than the doctor had done in the medical rooms and the carts popped open as if they were enthralled. Satisfied, Ragnor turned himself toward Alec.

"Now, let's take a look, shall we." They both looked at Alec, expectantly. It took a moment for him to realise what was being meant. With a bit of hesitance Alec undid the waistband of his robe and let it fall on the floor. Ragnor put his fingers on his chin maintaining a critical gaze. Alec didn't move. "Turn around," the stylist muttered between his fingers. Alec complied. There was another moment for silence.

"You were right, Elias, good thinking." Alec looked back at Ragnor inquisitively, was there something wrong with his body ? "Come and sit down on this chair." He gestured toward the stool.

Alec guessed that he still be needed to be in a disrobed state to do that so he left the garment on the floor. Ragnor joined him and sat down in the other stool front of his. He took Alec's face into his hands. The touch was gentle. "The best part of your body is your eyes…" fingers traced over his eyebrows. "We need to emphasize those. You're pretty average looking, even if you're pretty tall. It doesn't encompass any peculiar beauty. Eyes are windows to the soul."

Alec didn't reply. Elias came closer. Alec felt like he was being scrutinised. Ragnor didn't seem to need to touch any more parts of his body, which was a relief. "Since you don't seem to be talking much you need to be able to catch their attention with a single glance." He turned the tribute's head in his hands, humming pensively.

"I'd put a slightly darker colour here." He prodded on Alec's eyelids. "Contour there and there." Ragnor's nail rested on the neck. Alec shivered, it itched.

"I'd say we still go with the original hairdo we planned, maybe with the other golden crown ? It will look matching with the female tribute." For the first time Alec heard Elias talk in a longer sentence than just formal orders. His accent was just as Ragnor's, heavy and glottal, it seemed to swallow most letters.

The head stylist seemed to agree and released Alec's face from his grasp. "Great idea, Elias will take the reign for everything that is makeup, I'll do your hair." He stood up to let Elias take his place.

Alec already felt a bit more at ease now that he wasn't being judged so up close. They started to work on him, their hands never in the way of each other. Machines were pulled and used on him, mists and other creams were smeared and sprayed. Alec didn't move, not wanting to bother whatever they were doing to him.

"A few years ago there were more of us. Each tribute of district 2 had their own stylist; but my friend, who was in charge of the male tribute, decided he wanted to do more and be something greater for the games than to be the stylist of a tribute." Ragnor was spraying a certain foul smelling product on Alec's hair as Elias was putting the third layer of powder on his cheeks.

"Did he manage ? Do something for the games ?" Both stylists stopped in their tracks. Alec wondered if he had asked the wrong question. Ragnor scoffed under his breath.

"That he did." Alec could hear him smirk as if Ragnor was amused by the situation. Elias asked him to open his mouth and laid down a cream on his lips with a brush. "He still comes around, we're friends after all. We see each other often even if he is a busy man. Despite…" Alec locked eyes with Elias while he was still rubbing cream on his soft flesh.

"I don't think other people can handle him for longer than a few hours. He is pretty exhausting and undoubtedly eccentric. I love him dearly even if he has a penchant for the dramatic." Ragnor finished spraying and took a step back. Elias still looked at Alec.

"Friends don't abandon friends, they stay together through hell and back. Lovers however, are something else." There was bitterness in Elias voice. It echoed in Alec's heart as a message of grief. However, acceptance of the situation was the rendition of his words. He had been betrayed by a lover; pretty recently, Alec concluded. It made him feel sad for the man. Ragnor laid down a crown of golden thorns on his head. "You're all set, let me dress you."

The tunic they put him in was grey, a reminder of the stone quarries in district 2, it was loose and came mid-thigh. Ragnor put around him a breastplate of transparent ornaments, it was coloured to reflect some light and right now made it look white. At first glance Alec thought he knew what it was but the smell indicated that it wasn't adamas at all, it was probably glass. Ragnor then fastened more of those ornaments on his legs. They were asymmetric and crept up against his thigh like a vine. Ragnor then snapped with his fingers and suddenly two gusts of light appeared from his back, startling the wearer in the process.

"There, you look like an angel." Alec frowned, not sure he wanted to look like an angel.

"Wait," Elias stopped him in his tracks to look in the mirror. The man hurried over to him with a tool. He heard some sizzling at the height of his eyebrow.

Ragnor nodded approvingly, "Excellent, now take a look."

Alec was left stunned. He couldn't recognise himself immediately, but it was him as the man in the mirrored his stunned gaze. He didn't look like an angel. He looked like a warrior. A reminder of the angel that was painted on the murals on the main town hall in district 2. He looked ethereal, stern, the soft grey blended with his skin and dark hair. He looked celestial, ready to ascend, the ribbons of light that formed wings were encompassing his form, making him look noble. He looked deadly, ready for combat, his armour made him look like the general of an army.

His heart stopped. His blue eyes were indeed emphasized, the first thing with colour you would look at. The crown of thorns on his head was the last detail that was needed together with the glass vines creeping upon his legs.

He felt emotional. Not even minding that Elias had shaven a small part in the middle of his left eyebrow. He looked like what he wanted to look like. This was how he wanted Alicante to see him. Like a soldier. Like a winner. Like a bringer of peace.

"They sadly won't permit you to have any weapon on the chariot but I guess that the wings will do their little effect." The head stylist muttered something about a flaming sword.

Alec couldn't listen and started to shake a bit, biting his lip to keep him from crying. He felt himself ready to be part of this. This was _his_ moment, the moment where he would bring the first glance of Alicante's eyes on the Lightwood name. On him. On his strength and possible greatness. He looked like he was made for victory, robust and strong. A rightful challenger in the games.

"Thank you."

Ragnor's facial expression went from ecstatic, to concerned, to soft. He laid his hand on Alec's shoulder, feeling his own heart become heavy and in pain. The tribute's voice was strained on the verge of tears. "You're welcome, my boy." He let his fingers squeeze the shoulder, the face of the one he holds dearest coming to mind. "Your chariot awaits, make sure they'll remember you." Alec mouthed another 'thank you.' Ragnor only mirrored his smile.

– _They were all raised like pigs for slaughter_ –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alec at the remake centre is made by Michellemisfitx on twitter


	7. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The previous chapter has now fanart it by Michellemisfitx on twitter attached to it (Ao3 had fucked up my coding of it so it didn't display it until now) Go and check it out if you haven't already <3 it's at the bottom of the page.

_Citizens of Idris, I greet thee, my children, my people,_

_In this month of July where spring has come to us in its vainglorious manifestation._

_We are once again united by one and unique aspiration,_

_An aspiration toward Strength, Sacrifice and Nobility._

_The games of hunger,_

_Where Lilith before me has built the foundation, I have raised you all to a greater purpose._

_I welcome thee, tributes of every district, who will challenge the very definition of courage and purpose._

_Who will ascend to excellence and exaltation,_

_Who will show resilience, wits and prominence in battle,_

_Who will raise themselves above all the others before them and the ones after them,_

_Fortune is yours for the taking,_

_Good luck to you all,_

_Ad finem ultimum, to the final end._

* * *

Alec helped Lydia off the chariot. Just like him she couldn't stop smiling. Even if they both had tried to look imperturbable during their parade, they had failed. They had been too taken by the rush of adrenaline at being cheered on. It had felt so out-worldly good. She stumbled a bit against him. He caught her before she could fall any further. "Steady ?" She nodded, and stood back up. Her dress had been coloured the opposite of his outfit: White with grey and black glass ornaments. Her wings had extinguished the same time as his. Since then they had become unbelievably heavy. It pushed down on his thorax and made him short of breath. He could take the pain.

"Nice outfit, 2." The voice had come from the female tribute of district 1. Her dress was shaped like an upside down diamond, anywhere it caught light it would reflect it threefold.

"Same for you," He replied, losing his smile. He wasn't prepared for socialising with potential allies yet. She seemed to like his compliment since she ran her fingers through her hair.

"Well we'll see the sponsors' opinions about that," she giggled. Alec noticed the male tribute looking at him. His sharp features were accentuated with the silver powder on his cheeks. He didn't talk. His robe was interlaced with green gems. It looked like it cost more than everything Alec ever owned. The sound of the horns attracted their attention.

They were quickly put back in line. Per tradition district 1 was the first one to enter the training centre. Next was district 2, then 3 and so forth. They entered the hall and were quickly joined by their prep teams. Ragnor was talking quite vividly about the impression they had made. Tessa Gray had absolutely loved their wings. She had sent in a request for Ragnor to design a dress for her, the first few minutes they had been on screen. There was a bit of arrogance and pride in his voice, Alec noticed. But it was understandable. His peculiar enthusiasm was a bit contagious.

Lydia started to talk to the other woman that was with them, her hair was bronze and her smooth face seemed ageless. She was dressed in white pantsuit that was made of the same material as the cushions in the train. She was probably Lydia's personal stylist like Elias was for him. He glanced at Elias who was joining Ragnor in his praise of their performance. Hodge was still nowhere to be seen.

"How is the weight of your wings ?" Catarina appeared from behind him, she had changed dresses since this morning. This one was pale yellow. Another dress Izzy would have worn.

"Manageable," he replied. There was yet again this caring presence about her. She made him feel at ease with just a few words. He wondered if she could have been a nurse in another life. All of them made their way to the elevator. Catarina pushed in the button to get to the second floor.

Alec had expected it to be tackier, more cliché in its idea that every floor had to represent each district. It didn't. It was enormous. The amount of living space. It was certainly bigger than the cafeteria at the institute, even bigger than the training rooms as well. There were oddly shaped moving sculptures everywhere. The stairs to the different levelled surfaces were transparent and made of black granite. It looked empty, why was there a need for so much space ? It made him feel like he had to come closer to the walls, the openness was so strange.

Ragnor made his way toward the coffee table in front of the huge television screen. There was a bottle displayed with several glasses. He eagerly opened it, urging them all to join him. Alec stopped in his tracks when his attention was drawn to the people around them: servants; dressed in brown robes. They stood there silently like statues. He looked at his left where one stood next to him.

He had heard of them, the silent brothers, they had given up their ability to speak and see in a pledge of service and loyalty to Alicante. Their stitched mouths and hooded shaven heads were the elements of nightmares told to children in district 2 to make their will and ambitions to become peacekeepers stronger. It was said it was as much a punishment as it was a gift. Traitors were sometimes turned into silent brothers. But in district 2, however, it was believed that the transformation would give them unimaginable power, the silent guardians of the city of glass, disguised as servants. They creeped him out.

"Fascinating isn't it ?" Alec looked at Hodge who had stepped out of the elevator. The tribute shook his head. It wasn't fascinating. He never believed that losing your eyes and tongue would magically give you strength and power. Hodge smirked. He looked tired. As if he had been through something either emotionally or physically. Alec didn't mention it and let Hodge's hand on his back lead him to the table.

"This is what we call champagne. It's rare. Savour it." Ragnor pushed the glass in his hands before pouring himself another glass. It smelled sour. Catarina was watching silently as he hesitantly put the rim to his lips;

The taste was sharp, it didn't taste nice. He glanced at the others enjoying the experience. So he gulped down his glass. He felt his body react to it instantly. It gave him goosebumps all over his body, a small numbness spread to his fingertips. He felt some tension he didn't know he was carrying seep away little by little. Maybe he just needed to get used to it.

Catarina started talking about how her interviews went, people were asking the most about Lydia, lots of people compared her to a previous victor and now mentor of district 4. It was said they resonated with the same determination. Lydia seemed happy; Jia Penhallow was a strong woman. In her games she had outsmarted all of her other competitors by using nets made of leaves and carefully crafted traps. Alec had struck into the hearts of a few sponsors as well. However his stoic behaviour needed some polishing. It had been good he had given a few smiles here and there.

"We'll need to carefully craft what you'll be saying in your interview. Otherwise you'll pass under the radar and nobody will know who you are," added Catarina. She emptied her glass and looked at Alec. Her tone hid concern. But it didn't alarm the tribute yet. He knew he still had a lot of work to do. This was just the beginning. "I'll start with you when the coaching time comes. For now let's get you all out of your outfits. You must feel quite uncomfortable."

* * *

It was bizarre to have a room all to yourself. Back at the institute everyone, of all years, were put in dormitories. There had been curfews and morning drills, strict hourly discipline and very little free time during the day. Most evenings were clear for extra studying or training if you wished for it. The only moment where you'd see your parents while you were a trainee was once a week on a Thursday afternoon. It was busy, it was cramping. Alec had been happy when he and Jace, together with Izzy had found ways and spots to be free from the constant pressure of needing to perform. They didn't often sneak out because Alec hated to break the rules, but when they did, it was to be on the rooftops of the institute.

They were free from people around them. They would jokingly wave at the drones that surveyed the district, knowing that trying to hide was futile and a serious crime. Being charged for suspected treason was signing a death sentence. If you went out of line for any reason you'd be signing a death sentence. Being against the law was being against Alicante, death was the only rightful option for you. A public execution on the townhall's square for everybody to see. Unless of course you were a peacekeeper yourself. Then you could play around the rules, but not too much, just enough to stay alive.

This is why many aspired to become one if they weren't a victor of the games. Only the best scored trainees became peacekeepers, the others were sent to the quarries, a fate that nobody wished upon themselves either. People died young when they were working in the quarries.

He laid down on the bed to stare at the ceiling. For the first time ever he felt like he could move around on a bed without almost falling out of it. The bedsheets were something else than the cotton he was used to feeling. He closed his eyes. It was comfortable enough for him to completely relax in it.

Someone knocked at his door. He opened his eyes, noticing he had fallen asleep. Hodge stood at his doorstep. Without a second thought Alec let him in. "Lots of space isn't it, I had the same thing when I arrived here for the first time. Once you get your house in the victor's village it gets easier."

"And yet you live at the institute," Alec interrupted. He hadn't meant to bite. Hodge's facial expression closed itself off. But Alec knew the man could take a blow like no other. They had always considered each other equals when there was just the two of them in a room. "Just an observation." He let some silence fall, waiting for a reaction. But it never came. Hodge smiled and let Alec's comment slide as he changed subjects: "I've got something for you." Intrigued, the tribute approached the man who was rummaging through the pockets of his suit jacket.

What Hodge took out of it made Alec's heart stop.

"I made it clear to the medical and prep team that in no circumstances this should be lost." Alec reached out to Hodge's fingers to cradle the ring in his hands. "They let you keep a token of your district in the games. A little bit of sentimentality. The cameras love it. But I also know that you will find yourself gaining some strength from this once you are in the arena." For the first time Alec let himself be vulnerable in front of Hodge. The institute's constant praising of 'you have to rule and act with your head and not emotions' was to blame for that.

"Thank you," his voice was broken, but tears would never spill. Alec wasn't the crying type; His mother had taught him not to be.

"It's nothing, I know that Jace would have been just as protective of his as you are of yours."

Alec slipped the 'Lightwood' ring around his finger. The one thing that reminded him why he was doing this; His family, his glory, his fame to be. The original family ring had been lost. So when Alec and Jace had gotten their first masonry class, they hadn't been able to restrain themselves. They had forged rings. The 'L' for Lightwood for Alec and the 'W' for Wayland for Jace. They had kept it as something just for the two of them. It had all started off as a joke. But then they started to forget to take it off on a regular basis and in the end it became an important piece of their friendship. It was mainly a mutual promise to each other and to themselves to elevate their families to greatness. Personal grooming could put you into trouble with the law. But they didn't care, neither did the instructors and neither did their entourage.

It was the single most precious thing Alec owned.

He was so used to carrying it on him all the time. he had forgotten they had taken it off him during his medical check up. "I'll leave you to it." Hodge broke him out of his reverie and left. "Try to get more sleep, you won't get much of that once you're in the arena" were the last words before the door slid shut.

Alec sat down on his bed again, letting his fingers trace the adamas. It wasn't a pretty ring, it wasn't made for it to be polished. It was sturdy, strong. Just like the Lightwood family. He let a sigh escape his lips. Tension seeped away. He was able to do this. He was able to be a victor of these games. Dying wasn't an option; failing wasn't an option. Anything but winning wasn't an option. He'd persevere; win, overcome, conquer. And for once and for all do the right thing even if it meant losing some of himself here.

He didn't sleep much, even though he had for the first time ever taken a shower that had lasted longer than the allowed 5 minutes. All the different types of water sprays, and smells, were overwhelming and it had taken him ages to wash off the scents that had been intermixed. He had liked the one that smelled of sandalwood. Whatever the 'sandal' in that word actually meant. It was probably some type of tree that grew in district 7.

His skin was feeling so soft by the time he was finished. His callused hands, turned hard by training, seemed to soak in the oils and creams quite easily. It was still strange to be so devoid of hair, but he could forget all about it once he had changed the colour of the lights and the intensity of the water streams. He wouldn't have admitted to himself out loud, but this part of his stay in the Alicante had been his favourite so far.

He slipped out of his chamber. It was around 4 am so he was pretty surprised when he saw Lydia in the sofa. She had slipped on one of those two piece pyjamas with shimmering fabric. She was hugging a pillow while staring at one of the moving sculptures on the coffee table.

"Our routine morning drills start at 6 or 5, it's 4 am, yet we are both awake." Lydia turned at the sound of his voice. "Feels like a lifetime ago already. This is all so different from 2. I'm still waiting for someone to shake me awake because I would be dreaming." Alec joined her on the couch. He noticed there was a glass with fuming liquid on the table.

"It's tea," Lydia said, answering his silent question. "Catarina says it's good for sleeping. You can try it if you like. It just tastes like warm water to me." Alec picked up the unfamiliar shaped glass, he couldn't feel the warmth through it. It smelled a bit sharp as well. Tentatively he gulped a bit of the liquid. It tasted faintly of something. He couldn't describe it, it tasted at the back of his tongue. But Lydia was right, it indeed did taste mostly of warm water. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling.

"Do you think we could get clearance to be allowed to go on a morning jog in the training room ? The lack of exercise of today has already worn me down." She put the pillow away.

"I doubt we will, but we can always ask." Alec sat back to face her. She was scratching the back of her head.

"I wonder if the training suits of the tributes of 5 will have any wires plastered to them," she grinned. Alec laughed, their parade costumes had been ridiculous. The designers had given them a plastic helmet in the form of a light bulb and their whole suit had made them look like a copper wired mop. It had been unfortunately ugly. But the humoristic impression wouldn't soon be forgotten if they played their cards right.

"District 1 looks strong," he said with a more serious tone. They hadn't had time to check in with each other since they had come off the chariot. Lydia had seen right, this was the best time to reflect on possible strategies. They were unmonitored by the others; except, of course, the silent brothers. They were watching them with their eyeless faces, at all times. "I think the guy was called Malachite or something ?"

Lydia nodded, "the one with the feather tattoo on the side of his face ? I liked that Sebastian guy from 4. He seemed a bit more toned down than most of us but you could clearly see how the crowd loved him when he threw those roses at them."

Alec couldn't recall, he had been transfixed by his own face on the giant screens and he hadn't really looked at the tributes that were parading behind them. "I'll have to take a look at him. But if the crowd liked him, it means a bigger chance for sponsor if we do the career alliance."

She agreed with him, adding interesting details she had observed from both the tributes of districts 8 and 11. It occurred Alec that he liked her. Her strategic mind aligned with his, she had a down to earth attitude. She also seemed to understand him without any more words than necessary.

There was a silence between them until Alec dared to ask the question of why she had volunteered. A sadness she wouldn't have permitted herself to show to anyone was plastered on her face. He hadn't expected it and was even ready to apologise just as fast but she started talking, interrupting him in his momentum. "John," was the word she uttered. It encompassed so much pain that Alec was reminded of his mother when they discovered that Max might never wake up from his coma. "Do you remember how a year ago there was this collapse in the quarry ?"

He did. He felt his throat constrict itself, feeling like he shouldn't have asked. It was the same collapse that had hit Max, who had snuck out of the institute back at that time to play outside.

"We were supposed to get married but because of the accident… Well, a few people died. He was one of them." He laid a hand on her shoulder, not sure if it was a gesture to console her or to console himself. "I'm 18, just like you, he always said that if I were to compete in the games I would be victorious. He said I would look really good on the big screen in the town's square." She smiled bitterly at him. "Yesterday his mother died, she was old, and I just…" She looked Alec in the eyes, he felt himself open up to her as she confessed: "I just wanted to honour his memory by winning."

In a way it meant killing him, in a way it was a declaration of war. In a way she had given her weakness and weaponised him against her in the arena. In a way she had forfeited her own games by disclosing that. But he wasn't like that. He wasn't as sadistic like that. He realised he understood; he understood her and her struggle. Maybe not because he had lost someone like she did. But in the way of how he was doing it for his family, to honour them, cherish them. Be more than just a face and be the one that would fulfil his family duties. To become the best son one could wish themselves to have. Make his parents and his family name proud. Protect them, take care of them. He frowned. Lydia and him ? They were more similar than he liked.

He talked about it, how important his family was to him, what his motivations were for having volunteered. He talked about Max, and how his brother might never wake up again. He talked about most things but not everything. They weren't friends like that. They might have been, if they had met before or if the circumstances had been different. But it was what it was.

She listened quietly, laughed at his jokes on how they could both have done the 'lovebird' approach to have attracted more sponsors or even gotten married if they hadn't decided to volunteer. Alec found in Lydia what he never would have expected: a friend, an ally, but most importantly, someone he wouldn't mind losing his life to.


	8. Chapter 4

"First and foremost, in two weeks or less all but one of you will be dead."

Alec glanced at the other tributes in the room. Tributes of 9 looked like the youngest of the bunch while the others fluctuated on every side of the spectrum. He wasn't adept at guessing ages but he could see who had come to these games prepared. The tributes of 12 hadn't and that much was obvious. The boy was still snivelling and hadn't stopped crying since he had come in here. Alec locked eyes with the girl from 7. She silently snarled at him, and clearly didn't like him at all. She probably thought he was getting irritated by the crying boy. Well, she wasn't wrong.

He turned his attention back to the head trainer of the centre, Will Herondale. He didn't look as old as he should. He was lean, had dark hair and blue eyes. Alec felt like he was looking in the mirror when the man was talking to them. It was a strange feeling. However, his accent didn't give away that he had any origins in district 2. It was fascinating, if not unsettling. Maybe before the uprising he and the Lightwood family had shared some family history. Alec made a mental note to ask his mother when he was back from the games.

The first speech was about the rules, no killing and no infighting. Any tribute trying to fight another would be removed from the training program and would have a skill rank assigned at random. There was plenty of time for fighting in the arena.

Next part of the speech were basic primordial survival tips. Will made certain to give a meaningful look at Alec and the other tributes of 1 and 4. He insisted it was best to not overlook the basic skills. Most environments of the games were harsh enough to be the main reason why you would die in the arena. So naturally when he dismissed them all, the first thing Alec did was to go to the weapons rack.

Most of the things on the display were and looked more polished than anything he had trained with at the institute. There was an extensive array of things: a huge row of maces, swords, daggers, pole arms and whips, chakrams of various sizes – which was the weapon of predilection of Hodge and something Alec wasn't good at wielding or fighting against – and other kinds of hand and fist weapons.

Alec looked at everything but wasn't finding what he wanted the most, until another rack unfolded in the back: the ranged weaponry. It displayed knives, small axes, slings, spears and javelins. Alec approached it, already feeling excitement start to boil in his gut. He completely disregarded the row of crossbows and reached out to the bows. His favourites. They had different shapes, sizes, curvatures. They were all militarized, some of them had lenses, some of them had aids, some of them were overbearing, others more simple in their design. But each one of them was absolutely _gorgeous_.

"…Bows your thing, 2 ?" said Jace, wait no, not Jace. Alec couldn't keep the surprise from his face nor the hammering in his chest down. The young man next to him was slender, blonde, smaller than him, his eyes were grey, not golden, he didn't sound like Jace, his stance didn't come close to Jace's either. It wasn't Jace.

"I prefer crossbows, more precise and deadly." His training suit was green with woven patterns, the sigil of District 4 caught some light which made it look shiny.

"I hate to disagree, bows have just as much destructive power as crossbows. And they require more skill." Jace who wasn't Jace took on a fake offended facial expression; "You wound me." He was completely unlike Jace, the hair and the body type, he just looked like him… it wasn't _him_.

 _\- His heart ached -_

"Sebastian Verlac, district 4." Alec shook the extended hand, understanding immediately that district 4 had the same greeting salutes as Alicante.

"Alec Lightwood, district 2," he said as he briefly clasped his hand around Sebastian's. He didn't like this kind of touching. It felt too foreign. Sebastian smiled and Alec followed the man with his eyes.

"I'd challenge you to a sparring duel but as I understood we're not allowed to do anything against each other." The tribute took one of the throwing axes in hand. Alec took a knife in response.

"We need to preserve some excitement for the audience. So let's see which one of us can take the most targets down in 5 minutes," challenged Alec.

Knives, axes, even the slingshot, the tribute from 4 was more than just a little bit good. He explained later on that fishing required accuracy and well timed reflexes. Alec was impressed. Sebastian Verlac looked like an opponent with an elaborate set of skills. He passed the botanical tests effortlessly and was good at dodging obstacles. He was resilient and knew how to use his energy and body to his advantage. Alec was intrigued by how relaxed, confident and mature Sebastian was. He didn't do small talk and was focused at all times. Which was a day and night difference from the tributes of district 9 who clearly didn't know what they were doing.

They fumbled so hard with the matching sticks to start a fire that it was painful to watch even from afar. They seemed like two lost children. They would be the first ones to die.

The tributes of district 3 were quieter. They didn't speak much, only to each other. They had spent their whole afternoon at the trap making station. Probably because it was what was most familiar to them. Lydia was about to get to her fourth 15 kill streak under a minute when they were called for a break. She handed her bo staff to the weapon instructor in a swift movement that clearly was her just showing off in her own way. She was drenched in sweat and she was severely short breathed.

"I needed that," she grinned up at Alec. She had gone all out and seemed more at ease than ever. Every single station folded into the floor and a buffet of food and tables replaced them. The smell of all those baked goods was welcome; as of late he had been less wary of Alicante's food. He was even starting to enjoy it little by little. Especially the red fruit that was small and pear-shaped with green seeds and that tasted sharp upon his tongue. The tributes approached and served themselves food in white unbreakable plates. The cutlery was bendy and uncomfortable to use. Perhaps tributes of a previous year had tried to stab each other regardless of the rules.

At this very moment you could see who was forming alliances and who was going to be a loner in these games. Alec sat down with both districts 1 and 4, almost per tradition. The female tribute of 10 sat alone in a corner, not even wanting to sit at a table. The female tribute of 6 seemed to be doing the same. When Alec crossed a gaze with her she wasn't smiling like she had been on cameras. She was scrutinising him. It sent a shiver down his spine. There was something about that girl that made the hairs on his neck rise uncomfortably. Lydia tugged on his sleeve to draw his attention.

They presented themselves by name. Alec, Malachite or preferably 'Meliorn', Kaelie, Aline, Sebastian and Lydia. Sebastian and Aline were cousins. Meliorn and Kaelie had nothing in common apart from their tattoos which encompassed the same themes. All of them but Aline had volunteered. She was the daughter of Jia Penhallow. Which caught the attention of everyone at the table. She was praised to be so lucky, sailing on her mother's reputation. She will have lots of sponsors by default, Alec thought.

It was beneficial for him to keep her close. He looked at Lydia in mutual understanding. Aline would be the first tribute to become close with. Aline meant survival and better odds in attracting sponsors, an asset not to be overlooked.

He took another bite of the slice of bread between his hands. He looked up at the open platform above their training area. Sponsors and gamemakers were observing, lurking, scribbling on holopads. Most of them were having drinks and other substances. In a few days, one of them, if not a few, would try to kill him, mercilessly and without a second thought. They were here to plot how to play it all out, judge whom had the most value to them. The line between being a lifesaver and a vulture was pretty thin up there. He took another bite. He didn't recognise anyone up there. Not from the screens nor the interviews nor the coverage of the games in the districts.

"Magnus Bane hasn't shown himself yet," said Aline. She sat down next to him at the table. She was cutting an apple. Magnus Bane was the head gamemaker, often talked about but never broadcasted in the districts. Alec had only caught glimpses of him when he stood next to Lord Asmodeus to crown the victor of the games. "He is probably a busy man." Aline scoffed at his comment which made Alec frown. What he had said wasn't particularly humorous.

"He is, but that's not the reason why he isn't here. His arrogance makes him unwilling to show up to any event that doesn't feel 'worthy' to him." The rest of the tributes perked up at her comments.

"My mother says he also has a penchant for the dramatic. He is indefatigable, always coming with a more eccentric idea after the other. He is as merciless in his private life as he is in the games. He eats people up, chews them, spits them out to their 'rightful' place, which he thinks is beneath him. It is said that for the right price you can get all kinds of services from him. He doesn't care much about the tributes in general. He cares only for his primary ideas of the games and doesn't like too much input from others. He tends to get offended easily, I was told."

Alec pursed his lips, he didn't like the sound of that. Magnus Bane had been working for the games for as long as Alec remembered. The gamemakers were supposed to evaluate the tributes preemptively of the private showing. Hodge had explained it was that way so they would already tailor the games to the tributes. There was nothing more boring than to see tributes die without any purpose or just because they weren't posing a decent threat to the others. It was also good for inspiration. But as it seemed, Magnus Bane didn't care. He didn't care about them as people nor their skills or different ideas. It twisted something in Alec's gut.

"Why is he that way ?" Kaelie asked. There was a twinge of curiosity in her voice. But he could hear that she wasn't very pleased with what was being said.

Aline shrugged and ate a piece of her apple before she continued explaining. "Money? Fame ? Maybe he is just really passionate about the games ?"

That didn't sound right. Alec wouldn't let himself be toyed with that way. If he wanted Alicante to recognise him, to acknowledge him and his name, and bring comfort and glory to his family, then he wasn't going to be stepped on. Magnus Bane, head gamemaker or not, would look at him and recognise him as a worthy victor, regardless of what had already been planned for his games. He'd be the champion and overcome anything the man would throw at him. He was not to be overlooked. He was not to be dismissed. Alec would l make sure of that. He stood up. Break was over.

Time to kick some ass.


	9. Chapter 5

_He is running. It is dark, the buildings are broken and ready to collapse. There are wild dogs. Their snarls make his nerves fray. It's a never ending night. He is on his own. He has always been on his own. 'Rosa.' The name escapes his lips. It's his sister's. But wasn't his sister's name Izzy ? He couldn't recall. The bridge underneath him collapses. On the very last second he is able to keep himself from falling by pushing himself against the wall. The black smoke from the hole makes his blood run cold in horror. He needs to get out of here. He moves little by little to the side. He isn't fast enough._

_The smoked turns into that feared tentacle monster. It coils around his leg. Panic. His breathing dies in his throat as the tentacle grips on him harder. The acid burns through his trousers. He digs into his pocket. He uses the knife to stab. Once, twice, thrice. The monster growls. Once, twice, thrice. It doesn't budge. His knife breaks and falls._

" _Why won't you die ?" he mutters it, screams it. He isn't sure._

_He is dragged. The gravel underneath his palms and body scrapes him bloody. He needs to get away from it. One arrow gets shot. He wonders why he isn't dead. The monster retreats. He looks up. A hand is extended to him. Louis Karnestein. It's a lie, a betrayal, like so many others have done before him. He takes it. He doesn't think. He doesn't consider. His katar pierces Louis' throat. There is tons and tons of blood, it runs out of his mouth, over his chin, it splatters all over him. His eyes become glossy. Dead. And the hand on his wrist gives one last squeeze before it goes limp._

_He lets the body fall to the ground. The computerised voice of the games of hunger echoes with the thunder of the desert he is standing in._

" _ **Hail ! Raphael Santiago, district 6, victor of the hunger games."**_

* * *

Alec frowned as he dodged the first blow, the third and the one after that. He spun his feather-staff and it lodged itself into his holographic enemy. He dodged again. The fake arrow splintered on his weapon. He stabbed. Repeated it. Again and again. His reaction time was off. The last one attacked him and Alec finished him by sweeping his enemy off the ground.

"Well done Alec, best one you did today." Alec looked up at Will who seemed to be taking notes. Alec was not convinced but he didn't say anything to contradict the head trainer. "You're done with all the weapon stations, you sure you don't want to try the archery station ?" Alec shook his head, saying he would prefer going to the survival skills stations for the remainder of the day. They were after all not to be neglected.

Will hummed in approval. However, before Alec could leave, Will put a hand on his shoulder. He whispered: "It's okay to not want to show where your weaknesses are, but even if your archery skills aren't as good as you want them to be, they will always be better than the skills of some other tributes. Don't sell yourself short alright." The voice was kind and it reminded Alec of himself. But when it dawned on him what the head trainer had just said, he did his best to look impassable. He couldn't tell Will the truth. He didn't smirk in response either. If the sponsors or gamemakers were generous enough to generate bows for these games, Will would have a nice surprise awaiting him on screen. Maybe, once the games were over... they would be able to bond over it.

Kaelie was amusing herself in the camouflage station. Since she was on her own together with the trainer, he decided he'd make his first stop there. She had drawn further from her tattoo to the rest of her body. "Why are you looking so glum ?" She didn't look up at him as she traced a shade on a green line that represented moss. Alec had to be honest It looked pretty good.

"I had a nightmare," he said as he sat down with her. Her hands were dirty from mixing the dyes and other substances. He had pinged her for being a girl that was scared to get in contact with filth and dirt. He was proven wrong.

"I get bad dreams sometimes too," she said as she was applying another coat of dark wood coloured paste to her leg. "It's usually about my sisters dying. It makes me wake up screaming and drenched in sweat."

Alec perked up at her comment, then frowned as she started to laugh at his reaction. "Just kidding, I don't have any sisters. I'm an only child." He didn't laugh. It wasn't remotely funny. "Sorry, it isn't as funny as I wanted it to sound. Here, maybe try to copy this part of my camouflage. It will keep your mind busy." She extended her paintbrush to him. He took it and started painting on his arm. He was nothing of an artist but it looked decent by the time he finished. Even the instructor was pleased with his work.

He took the botanist test for the last time and aced it all, same for the basic fire and trap making skills. By the time he was at the gauntlet station he felt a bit better about himself. His lack of sleep had thrown him off his game until now. He had tossed and turned around in his bed and thoughts about today had just haunted him like there was no tomorrow. He sprinted off; jumped; dodged. It felt like he could go through the parkour effortlessly. He had the reflexes. The timing, the energy to spare. He felt his muscles strain and he knew that if they had been allowed a morning jog these last two days, he would have been even quicker. He finished the parkour and restarted it again right after; disregarding two of the tributes that were waiting their turn.

It felt good and at the end he felt more focused. "Ready for your private showing, Lightwood ?" He turned himself to Meliorn, who was showing off his perfectly made net by draping it over himself like a cape. He had even taken off his shirt.

"I wasn't until now, I'm going to be taking a shower after the break to prepare myself mentally," said Alec while crossing his arms. He had been sweating quite a lot and honestly his muscles needed more than just stretching. Meliorn seemed to approve. Alec noticed he was already feeling a bit nervous. But that wasn't be something he would share.

"Hey, 4 ?" Meliorn shouted out, startling Alec in the process. Sebastian looked up inquisitively from his trap he had just made with Aline. "I think I'm creating a new style. Tell your stylist he should be taking notes." He twirled around ridiculously.

There was a giggle.

Alec's eyes darted over to the woman who had just laughed. She was sitting on one of those transparent sculpted chairs on the platform. Her hair was different shades of brown and red, they were ornated with green leaves. She had around her a few other women in weirdly shaped dresses. A silent brother was filling up her glass with a white lucent liquid as she continued giggling.

"At least someone appreciates a good joke." With astonishment Alec witnessed Meliorn blowing a kiss toward the woman. She started to giggle even louder. "I hope I will have your support in these games, my Lady." He winked. She giggled some more before nodding in approval.

And just like that it was done. Alec kept his face from contorting itself into a weird expression of jealousy. How did the man do that ? It had happened so naturally it was feeling unreal. Meliorn shared another smile with the woman and then went on about himself. How was it even possible to be that careless and free when talking with people. Alec wasn't jealous per se. But the effectiveness was blatantly obvious. He was pretty envious at how easily Meliorn had just secured himself a sponsor in only a few interactions. He debated with himself if he should be isolating Meliorn for a second; so that he would spill his secrets to Alec. But decided against it, the man would only give him half-truths. That much was clear from their banter and the way he talked to Alec. He was sincere, didn't seem to lie, but would always answer questions with other questions. Meliorn was a mystery and hid himself behind words and smiles. He kept his secrets well-guarded. It was impressive, if not a bit intimidating.

Alec looked up at the platform. There were more people today. Perhaps because it was the last glance any sponsor could take at the tributes while they were in their training element. He hoped he had made a good impression by trying harder regardless of his unbalanced focus. Even if he hadn't been at his best today, he had still been able to give a show of his stamina and array of skills.

Hopefully it would be enough.

They all prepared themselves. It looked like everyone was in their own world. There was no idling and people tried to stay focused. They weren't really allowed to talk while waiting. Alec sat back down against the wall. He was waiting, like everyone else, to be called in for their private sessions. He could have been pacing around but they weren't allowed to leave their waiting line. Meliorn was the first one to be called. Alec shared a glance with Lydia. She looked a bit tense but he knew she would be okay. Alicante already liked her. 10 minutes later Kaelie was called. She stayed 15 minutes and the guard called his name. It was going faster than he had expected.

"You can do this Alec, you know what to do. You've prepared for this for longer than a few days now," she tried reassuring him. "Just make sure you adjust them before trying them out. They are not the same as the ones in the institute." She squeezed his hand and he felt himself fill up with confidence. He muttered a 'thank you' before getting up to go into the training space. He exhaled and inhaled deeply. By the time the doors slid shut behind him he felt his reawakened confidence buzz through his body.

There was chatting up on the platform. He tuned it out. Only one goal was set into his mind. He let himself relish in the echoes of his shoes upon the floor as he made his way toward the ranged weapons rack. He wouldn't watch them. It would raise some anxiety he didn't want to show. He wasn't here to watch and observe them. They were here to watch _him_.

"Alexander Lightwood, district 2."

He let his hands ghost over the different options. He could take the traditional bow. It was elegant. If the arena was a forest he'd be able to make his own and show his skills. But for his private showing it didn't pack a punch. He let his fingers wander toward the familiar shape of the recurve bow, his favourite. He knew this kind of bow inside and out. But going all out for a first try might make the middle part of his session boring. His hands landed on the compound bow. He had only used these kinds of bows thrice. It looked intricate and was pretty to look at. Usually when you fired this one it made archery look easy.

He prepared the protection for his hands and arm. Of course in the arena you had neither. But he still decided to take advantage of the situation. In the institute he was often obliged to let the protections for what they were, they were mostly non-existent. He fastened the quiver around his leg for easier access. He wanted to shoot fast today. He unhooked the bow. The weight dragged his arms down. He loved it. There was nothing alike with either of the other bows. He lived, breathed, existed for it.

The strings were already waxed but he coated them once more just to be sure. There was still some chattering on the platform. He decided to go with the standard distance. His first shot was clear, clean. Right where it needed to be. He shot two more arrows. He shifted his stance and shot from one knee on the ground. Three arrows were lodged in the target's head. The shots were meticulous and consistent. The sound of the clicking of the arrows one after the other on the string was real music to his ears. The chattering had died down a bit. Probably so they could watch him better. He smiled. He went to the complete back of the room.

He couldn't keep down a bigger smile as he yet again shot his arrows with exemplary accuracy. There was some clapping from above and he walked back up to the bow rack. He wasn't going to try the traditional bow. He wanted to show off. He took the recurve bow. The lightness of it made his heart flutter. He felt himself float in some kind of happy bubble. The balance of this bow felt exactly like what he liked.

He fired three shots in quick succession. Then five, then three again. His muscles were straining already but he didn't care. He had shot impeccably. The chattering rose and he felt himself beaming with pride, finally feeling at home. Just for a little bit he sensed himself relax. He knew how to do this. This was his joy. His strength. The one aspect that defined him. It was his craft. Everything he could praise himself for. The chattering became louder. They seemed impressed as they started whistling. He took three arrows and shot them all together at once. It was his special trick. It looked so good he repeated it again.

Satisfied, he wondered if he was to indulge in still trying the traditional bow. He glanced at the platform and his heart dropped to his stomach.

The chatter had risen. The applause had been going on. Praise and whistles had echoed. But it wasn't for him. Since the beginning it hadn't been for him. They were all standing, conversing, laughing, their attention not drawn to him but to the man who had only arrived a few minutes ago. His dark hair was dyed with blue streaks; jewellery adorned every ear and every finger. The richness of his clothing was something Alec could see from where he stood, golden and black. His gestures were eccentric and flowed like water. His body language irradiated confidence from every pore, every fibre of his body.

'Magnus Bane'

The name tasted like ash in his mouth. There were only eyes for him. The whole world seemed to gravitate around him. Nobody was paying attention to what was happening a few feet from them. It was all about Magnus Bane. There was a refill of glasses, more praising words and excited conversation. Some people were watching Alec, one or two of them, but they were quickly distracted as the head gamemaker suddenly made a joke that made the whole crowd start laughing. In mere seconds it all became pointless.

Alec gripped his bow tighter. His breathing became more rapid. His teeth ground into each other. He felt his blood boil. He looked at the man who went on kissing women and men alike, greeting them, thanking them, distracting them, acknowledging them. He moved around as if he owned the whole place. Reducing everything to nothing.

'Magnus Bane'

There he was. Erasing everything Alec had ever worked for. Erasing the past few minutes that would have made and created the Lightwood name. His odds, his survival. Disgraced; forgotten; reduced to mere insignificance. Nobody was watching anymore. They were all around him like bees around sugar and flowers. He had them all trapped in his grasp. Ignored, dismissed, Alec was diminished to being negligible. It all fluttered away. The meaninglessness of his existence just floated about. Whatever was achieved now were mere words and no deeds. Alec being here was now trivial, futile, barren of any relevance. Alec was looking up, standing still as a statue. But they didn't care. Not a single one of them.

'Look at me'

He was standing there, cancelled out without having had any chances. Without having had any possibilities, overlooked, inconsequential. His hopes, his aspirations, his desires: Broken. His knuckles hurt. The goosebumps on his arms made him shiver. His sweat clung to his brow; His furor rose. And rose again. The more they laughed, the more he inflamed with burning hatred.

'Look at _me_ '

His breathing was starting to be ragged, torn in his lungs; shattered by his incinerated dreams. The muscles of his body were tense to the point of breaking. He was trembling. The rage. The anger. It coated his mouth, his teeth, his eyes. It poisoned his head, his heart. Madness overtook him.

'LOOK AT _ME_ '

Anchor point at the corner of his mouth, he shot the arrow without thinking.

The scream was sharp and unruly but there was nothing more.

Stunned silence reigned over the room. Magnus Bane… his yellow eyes were gleaming as he made a command gesture toward the arrow suspended in mid-air. It fell down into the ground, sticking itself deep into the concrete floor. He had the reflexes of a cat; had seen the arrow being shot at him despite its incredible speed. Alec would have snarled at the man if he had it in him. But he didn't. He clenched his jaw. Every single pair of eyes was upon him at this moment. He had succeeded at last. He let himself bask lowly in the attention bestowed upon him.

"My name is Alec Lightwood, district 2, thank you for your time,"

His voice echoed through the room. Nobody said anything. Not even the famed Magnus Bane whose eyes were shining from afar. Alec walked out. The adrenaline in his veins kept him from looking back. He couldn't hide his smirk. He had given them all a show that they wouldn't be able to forget. Alexander Lightwood was now burned into their minds forever.

* * *

He couldn't breathe. He had been stuck under the shower for over 10 minutes now. His whole body felt heavy and his muscles were still unable to relax. He had just scrambled off his T-shirt. Taken off his shoes. He couldn't breathe. What had he done ? By the angels and demons above what had he done ? Shooting an arrow at no other than Magnus Bane's head. He had lost his temper. He never lost his temper. Not even when Izzy had ruined his first bow or when Jace had broken his favourite jacket. Alexander Lightwood just never lost his temper. It wasn't done. It wasn't permitted. It wasn't allowed. He shouldn't have done it. They were probably going to punish him for that. They would come and take him away. It had all been for nothing. They would kill him. His family. They would execute them all. Make an example. What had he done ?

The knocking on his door was more consistent, louder, stronger. He punched down commands to activate another water spray. This one was stronger than the previous.

"Alec ! Are you going to come down or not ? They are going to be showing our scores at any moment. " Her fist banged louder.

"Lydia, leave me alone," he said, trying not to sound desperate.

He heard her reply something. He didn't hear it. He calculated in a mist of smells. Lavender wasn't something he had tried yet. If he were to die, then it was better he'd do so while having fully lived. He put his back against the chromatic tiles as he let the water sprays massage the tension of his muscles away. At this very moment he regretted every single life decision he had ever made. He closed his eyes, trying to forget every single life decision he had ever made. Once he finally felt calmed down he tried to peel away the rest of his clothing. He switched the water to less warm before he finally let himself relax.

"Magnus Bane"

He said the name out loud. It rolled over his tongue like something foreign. Alec remembered how Meliorn was able to capture an audience's attention without much effort. The head gamemaker, in retrospective, had a whole other level of charisma. Even if it pissed Alec off, even if it had enraged the tribute like there was no tomorrow, it was to be admired. With his mere presence alone, Magnus Bane had changed the very essence and purpose of a room. He was a leader, respected and renowned; even humorous if he was to believe the laughs he had heard. He was everything Alec wanted to be. If they didn't kill him first thing next morning. There was maybe some hope that they were too far into the process of the games for executing him publicly. Or they would let him do his interview, kill him and then put a decoy in the arena to be killed in the bloodbath.

He stopped his shower; got out and dried himself. He slipped into a T shirt and pants that reminded him of his uniform of district 2. Of course it wasn't the same but it made him feel comfortable, a bit safer than anything else Alicante's fashion had to offer. He picked up his soaking wet training clothing and shoes and gave it to the nearest silent brother as he exited his room. The television was still playing. The training scores were still being announced. They were at district 11 as he came down to join the others.

Almost everyone but Catarina stood up when they saw him. The silence was deafening. Alec was too tired and numb to even feel any tension growing in his body anymore. He closed himself off by crossing his arms in front of his chest. If they wanted to scorn him he could take the blow. He'd probably be dead tomorrow. His chances for even competing in the games pummelled right when he shot that arrow at Magnus Bane's head.

"Is it that bad ?" He gritted between his teeth.

The scores of the last tributes were announced. Ragnor paused the screen with a gesture of hands and rewound the whole announcement. Alec laid eyes upon the screen as Tessa Gray's gentle voice restarted her sentence.

"…trict 2, Lydia Branwell, a score of 10. Alexander Lightwood with a score of…" Tessa smiled and looked at the camera, an excited tone inside her words. "11" Alec's jaw dropped. Excuse me did he hear that correctly? Ragnor paused the screen.

"What did you do ?" Lydia asked. He could hear the envy in her voice.

How was this possible ? He tried to talk but he couldn't. Seeing his struggle, Catarina asked him to come and sit down with them. His footsteps were heavy. He sat down between Hypatia and her. He couldn't believe it. Was this the way they were going to kill him ? Get every other tribute to see him as the biggest threat in arena ?

"It's okay, Alec, take your time." He looked up at Hodge and he started to explain. His skills, his ideas what he wanted to achieve and what he felt when they were plainly ignoring them. Everyone was silent and gave him time to explain; He didn't talk about his fear. Nor about his insecurities. When he finished explaining he looked up toward the television screen with the frozen frame of his face, the number '11' ominously floating over it.

Ragnor started to laugh. It surprised everyone in the room except Catarina who started to take sips from her glass, sat back into the couch, and relaxed. Alec was about to ask what was so funny but Lydia beat him to it.

"He must have admired your guts, even more so, he was probably impressed by you." Ragnor started pacing around excitedly. "I'd even go as far as to say: he _liked_ you." That attracted everybody's gaze.

Wait what ? Magnus Bane _liked_ him ? How was that even possible. "I don't see…" how ? Alec left his sentence unfinished. But Ragnor didn't calm down, he refilled his glass of wine.

"I have known Magnus for over 20 years now," he drank and just kept on smiling. "If you piss him off, trust me, you'll know. He wouldn't give you this kind of score to scorn you. If he wanted to, he would have put you below 5. Any sponsor would drop out immediately without a second thought. An '11' is good, better than just good. People will be intrigued, curious. This kind of score doesn't come just like that. It's earned." Ragnor looked up at Hodge, waiting for the mentor to give his own commentary on the subject.

Hodge scratched his chin. "I can more than just work with an 11, the only other tribute to get the same score is Aline Penhallow, district 4. I'd be able to seal early sponsor deals just on these facts alone." He looked lost in his thoughts. He had the same facial expression as when he formed new battleplans at the institute.

Alec remembered Hodge getting a score of '9' back at the time. Which meant Lydia was going to be fine. Hodge had gotten his share of sponsors during his games; Alec getting an '11' wasn't going to overshadow her. But she didn't seem to share those thoughts. Lydia still looked upset and envious.

"If Alec hadn't done what he did, Magnus would have probably done what he always does: disregarded what happened during the private sessions and assigned the scores at random on what the others told him to give. It's good that Magnus' attention was snapped back into the games. He probably paid more attention after Alec's session than he has in the past 10 years of the games." Catarina was as soothing as ever. Lydia listened to her.

"You bet he hasn't, Magnus doesn't believe in anyone but himself. You can believe that everyone who got their score today got a thoroughly evaluated number." Ragnor drank his whole glass empty. "You finally both have a real chance of winning these games." Alec noticed that despite his words and intonation his smile was sad. It filled Alec's stomach with dread. Nobody seemed to notice it.

The head stylist refilled his glass to the rim before drinking from it. Elias commented on how they would tailor the interview outfits so they could reflect the score number. With enthusiasm Hypatia jumped on the ideas and ideas flew back and forth between them and Ragnor. The rest started to talk about the interviews and the coaching moments planned in for the next day. Alec decided to stay silent, still not quite sure if he were to be executed or not for having attacked gamemakers and sponsors alike. He didn't address his fear explicitly but at the end of the evening he was a bit more reassured he wouldn't wake up dead tomorrow morning.

He went to bed early that night. He wasn't tired but his body was. It had taken a lot of energy from him to calm down. He shut down the light and stared at his ceiling despite the darkness of his room. He didn't feel at ease, but he didn't feel stressed. There was a flutter in his chest. An inspiration of excitement intermixed with uncertainty. He had done well today, despite what his feelings had been, despite what his initial reactions and thoughts had been. His chances and odds for the games had increased. The Lightwood name had been spoken out loud and people had listened. He wouldn't soon forget how everyone had given him space to talk and be more than just a mere tribute. He had succeeded and this was yet again a step closer to his end goal. He allowed himself to be proud.

'Magnus Bane'

A man full of charisma, strength and ambition. A man who meant so much and whose influence probably stretched beyond anything Alec could currently imagine. He had given Alec the chances to prove himself even more. It was thrilling. Exciting. Alec pushed his palms against his eyes. He couldn't stop the smile creeping upon his face. Somewhere he was relishing in the pleasure of having lashed out. It felt amazing, liberating. 'Alexander Lightwood, district 2, victor of the hunger games' never felt so real until now. It was everything he had ever felt proud off. He was _so_ happy.

Alec fell asleep quickly, restful and focused on what the next day would entail for him: The interview with Tessa Gray, coaching on every front by Catarina and Hodge and well-deserved meals in celebration of those. A few thoughts lingered toward Izzy and Jace. They were probably so happy for him back in district 2. They would root for him like there was no tomorrow. As he sunk deeper into the arms of blissful oblivion one last question lingered in his mind: If he'd ever be able to see Magnus Bane's fascinating eyes again. Maybe even from up close. Because he had to admit it to himself, even from afar, they had looked absolutely beautiful.


	10. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All players are on the chessboard, let the games truly begin

The midday sun had risen for a few hours now. It inundated the city of glass with a soft orange glowing light. The weather in Alicante was artificially regulated by devices and today was no exception. The temperature was warm enough that you didn't need a coat and it wasn't moist enough to be uncomfortable. People went to work, kept themselves busy. Woke up, went to sleep, walked in between the glass galleries and strolled their ways through the parks. Mundane stuff.

He shouldn't be distracted but he was. There were so many more people outside than usual. From the big window overlooking Alicante he could see them all. Crowds were gathering all around the squares and there were peacekeepers maintaining a secure perimeter all around the training centre. There were chants, clapping, whistling. On the buildings in the distance Alec saw the promotional art of the games displayed in huge. He couldn't decide whether he found it humbling or embarrassing that his face was shown all over Alicante. Even if the banners were hanging from the Adamas spires. He tried to get back to Catarina but she seemed to have finished her sentence a few minutes ago.

"Distracted ?" he nodded, feeling a bit bad that his mind had gone its merry way. She had put so much effort into his coaching and he couldn't seem to keep his mind to it. She closed off the holographic examples she had been displaying with a hand command. She stretched her arms above her head, visibly dropping her teacher demeanor.

"Shouldn't we continue ?" There was still so much to do and the day was far from being over, he didn't know how long they still had. There weren't exactly any clocks on their floors. She shook her head.

"There is no harm in taking a break." She walked away to talk to a silent brother who left after hearing her instructions. She stood still, waiting for him to return. He stood up to stretch his legs. The morning drill with Hodge had been familiar, they both knew exactly what he had to say to Tessa. Since he took a more stoic approach, he had already determined that he would not be talking about his feelings. Nevertheless, Hodge had warned him that Tessa would do her best to worm her way in and ask personal questions. That's what people absolutely loved to know. Alec had agreed to talk about his family and Jace if it was needed, but he was reluctant. 

He didn't want it to look like he was here for them even if there was an irrevocable truth to it. He didn't want to expose his weaknesses, not to Alicante and certainly not to the other tributes. He wanted to keep everything to the peacekeeper code, his values, his name and what it would mean for him to be crowned victor. If he was able to nail that down, he'd be able to secure some possible sponsors. Choosing him meant stability and keeping up everything the games stood for. He felt confident but he wasn't sure how he'd react when he was put in front of a crowd. He had never liked talking to large groups of people anyway.

Catarina came back two glasses with fuming liquids in hand. He smiled at her. She had taken a liking to making him taste all kinds of different types of tea. This one was apparently based on the red fruit he had come to like so much since he was here.

"I wonder what Lydia will say in her interview," he said after some silence. The water was still too warm. He put it down on the table in front of him. Catarina didn't talk much if it wasn't needed. She either didn't like small talk or she just catered toward her conversation partner's needs.

"She will be talking about John. Since he is already dead, they can't use him against her in the games, she said." His heart clenched. He wondered how Max was doing. Not that there were any chances for him actually waking up in the time that Alec was away. He wondered how his mother was doing and if she would be able to keep herself from getting into heated arguments with his father. He wondered if Izzy had been able to beat his most-creative-kills-of-the-month rank. If she had access to her electrum whip again, he didn't doubt she would already have done it the day he left. Jace… he didn't want to think about Jace.

"Are you alright ?" Catarina looked at him in concern. He was surprised that his mood had shifted so easily and that it was readable on his face. He didn't answer and drank from his tea. Hopefully it was enough of a message that he didn't want to talk about it. But Catarina didn't let go.

"You don't have to answer." She sipped her tea. "We all have regrets, Alec. Things we should have done, things we wished we had done, things we shouldn't have done. I personally think there are two ways to go on from this. You can wallow and be stuck in the past or you can take up your responsibilities and move on. I don't know what's troubling you and you don't have to tell me. But know that you can find a friend and a companion in me if you so desire."

He was rendered speechless. He hadn't expected her words to mark so deeply inside himself. He had found a lot of companionship in Lydia because she understood where he came from. Catarina ? She was from Alicante. Her blue skin, her way of dressing, the way she smiled so easily and went out of her way to comfort people, was his polar opposite. She got and understood him before he even understood what he was feeling himself.

"I-" he tried, "thank you, I'll keep that in mind." He didn't know what else to say ; it troubled him. Catarina troubled him. All of the people of Alicante he was close to troubled him. They were different from what he had ever imagined. Even Hodge, who had been his institute's trainer since forever. The man was different, caring. He was a drill sergeant and colleague at the institute. Here ? It was so unlike him. Hodge accepted his input and pushed him in the right directions, looked out for him and Lydia in ways he wouldl only realise once he was in the arena.

"You shouldn't be doing that." Alec looked up at Catarina inquisitively. She drank from her tea and stuck out her chin to gesture toward his hands. "Fidgeting doesn't convey a confident attitude." He stood still. He had indeed been turning his ring around his finger. He usually did it when he was lost in thought. He disengaged his hands from each other. He relaxed his shoulders and leaned forward a bit more, like she had taught him a few hours ago. He picked up his glass and drank from the tea.

Catarina hummed in approval. "Make sure to never cross your arms over one another, it closes you off." It sounded very challenging if Tessa was going to pry into his personal life. "If you pay attention in daily life, you'll notice that a lot of people who are lying or are on the defensive will cross their arms. Mostly because they want to protect themselves." He nodded in acknowledgement. He never thought about it that way. "Of course it isn't always correct but in this case it is vital for you to make sure that you aren't closed off."

"At least smiling isn't required," he said while finishing his tea. He had practiced trying to smile in the mirror for so long, feeling like an idiot. It had been a relief when Catarina had opened the coaching moment with saying that.

"Alec, I want to make certain that it was clear that in no way I meant that you had an ugly smile. Quite the contrary." Alec was a bit startled by her comment and more so when she continued: "You have a genuine tender smile when you talk with people you care about. It shows you have empathy. But you can clearly see when you use your smiles as a functional thing. In your stoic approach you can't be finding yourself trying to smile to appease the audience." He felt himself blush in embarrassment.

She stood up. Her hands crept up his face, he let her do so. She tilted his chin upward. "Confidence is also shown when you keep your head high." She takes a few steps backwards. "You'll need to ask Elias to do your eyebrow again. He was right to do it the first time. It'll make you look like you're a soldier. It gives you something to be remembered by visually."

The door slid open. Ragnor was chatting with the team in enthused intonation. He had yet again the robotically auto piloted makeup containers with him, in his hands was an extremely long bagged gown. Elias took it over when the head stylist noticed them. He kissed Catarina on the cheek.

"You wouldn't believe what happened yesterday," he said excitedly. His accent was thicker than usual. "I had an epiphany last night and I started sketching this concept of a dress. And this morning while I had just finished up sketching out the pattern on fabric, Tessa called me, she will be dressed in my clothes tonight! Millions of people will be watching tonight and I will have dressed the main host of the event." He started rambling about details. Elias approached from behind. "He called us awake, we've been redesigning your and Lydia's wardrobe since this morning." He sounded exhausted. Hypatia looked cheery and asked where Lydia was. Alec replied she was upstairs with Hodge going over some last details. Ragnor joined her upstairs.

Alec understood quickly that the coaching time was over. Elias pushed him onto the unfolded chair. Catarina gave them space but still talked to him a bit before she decided to take her leave. She wanted to get into her own dress since she had secured a seat in the audience on the front row. She kissed Elias on the cheek and squeezed Alec's hand.

"Tessa will mirror your body language, she'll try to make you feel at ease the best she can. Copy her way of sitting on her chair at the very beginning and everything will flow naturally." With these last pieces of advice she left the floor. There was silence before Elias started talking. He was explaining how they had changed the colour palette of their outfits. Lydia's green had become grey. More military inspired. His had turned black. His jacket now had leather details that were still riddled with ugly seams that they would have to cover up the best they could right before the interview.

Elias' delicate hands took care of Alec's face. It was still very strange to have a hand this close to his face that wasn't just there to punch him. He had stopped recoiling from it. He still hated the feeling of powder touching his cheeks, but at least Elias did his best to accommodate them both in the best he could.

When Ragnor came down he ordered Alec to undress immediately. He did what he was told. Alec's sense of shame had evaporated since they had all seen him naked numerous times during the process of needing to dress and undress him.

Ragnor had taken a tremendous time with Lydia and he seemed annoyed. He took Alec's outfit out of the protective film it was secured in. The tribute didn't dare to ask what had pissed off the head stylist.

They dressed him in a white shirt with black dress pants. His jacket was black with leather shoulder pads. The cut reminded him of ancient military outfits. However, the jacket closed with a zipper and had decorative buttons on the side.

"I'm glad we didn't add the studs," Ragnor muttered trying to sow away the seams at the shoulders. He stung Alec repeatedly in the shoulder with the needle but Alec didn't even flinch. Once the frantic sewing was done the head stylist took a step back. "Redo his eyebrow, Elias." Elias complied and went over to Alec to pluck the newly grown hairs. Ragnor rolled up the sleeves of both his jacket and shirt.

"You look strict, bad boy enough for people to notice you in a crowd. But not so much to be seen as rebellious." He tapped his fingers on Alec's forearms. "You have nice forearms, showing them off wouldn't be a bad thing." Ragnor laid his eyes on the ring on Alec's hand. His expression became softer instantly. A good memory was resurfacing. Alec would have asked what was on the stylist's mind if at that moment Lydia hadn't come down. Her grey dress wasn't as big as Alec had initially thought or seen from the transportation bag. It looked like a decent stern dress that reminded him of his mother's head peacekeeper uniform.

"Hypatia was right, it looks way better this way." Ragnor was waving dismissively toward Elias who was about to say something. The stylist grinned at Alec and even gave a wink. It was perhaps the first time that Ragnor actually admitted he had been wrong about something.

Hodge emerged a bit later. His clothes had been changed as well. He had a strained expression on his face. Alec didn't mention it. Hodge had been looking more and more tired every day he had spent here in Alicante. They all made their way downstairs.

The clamour was loud and deafening. Every district had a car parked in front. His name was chanted as much as Lydia's as they made their way down the stairs. Some had holographic signs saying 'good luck' and others with 'District 2' or '10 and 11' when it was about the scores. Hodge waved to the public with a well-made-up unnatural smile. He opened the door to let Alec and Lydia get in and sit down.

"Good luck you two, obviously I can't come with you. Keep your heads clear as always. There is no place for failure when you're focused and using your skills the right way. Remember: Facilis descendus averni, the descent into hell is easy..."

"… And we are but Shadow and dust, Pulvis et umbra sumus." Both Lydia and Alec finished the sentence. Hodge's smirk was a sincere one, full of fondness. He closed the door. The driverless car instantly started speeding up. The people all around them where going crazy. Alec's heart was beating faster by the minute. He didn't know whether he should be elated or scared about the amount of screams around them. It was pleasant and overwhelming at the same time. He tensed up in surprise when Lydia's hand crept up on the side of his leg, but relaxed again when she grabbed his hand, squeezing it. He was baffled but he couldn't ignore the fact that it was really soothing. No words were uttered.

Alicante was only a blur of a landscape until they arrived at the public broadcasting theatre. They waited for a peacekeeper escorting team to collect them. The cars could of course only be opened from the outside. Perhaps in a measure of protection for the tribute. When Lydia broke their handholding, Alec felt a bit sad. The unspoken truce and friendship between them was something Alec really cherished. Her comfort was something he had learned to appreciate every step of the way these past few days.

When they got out Alec realised there were no more people around. There was tight security everywhere and as they walked Lydia and him were surrounded by four peacekeepers. Lydia stepped closer to him.

"Seems a bit excessive don't you think ?" He asked, letting her hold him by the arm. She was struggling to walk in heels. They were pretty high. Since the uniform in district 2 had flat shoes, he could only imagine how hard it was for Lydia to walk in them.

"I think it's mostly to make sure we don't make a run for it." She held on to him tightly. He evened out his steps so she could copy his pace and lean on him. She huffed in content.

"Not sure you'll be able to run anywhere while wearing those kind of shoes." She pinched the inside of his arms. It made him flinch slightly, but he smirked regardless.

"I don't think you would be the epitome of elegance either if you were to wear these." He agreed. They looked mostly impractical.

They were sent into an elevator accompanied by another armed peacekeeper. The hallway was small and dimly lit. Very much the opposite of what they had seen before; the words 'behind the scenes' were something that resonated deeply into Alec's heart. He had to let go of Lydia who could no longer be at his arm. She was able to walk pretty steadily and steadfast, but her face was scrunched in concentration. It felt a bit ominous and he could feel his restlessness rise. This whole thing felt unnerving. Soon the corridor expanded wider; in the distance he could see two other tributes waiting. Kaelie and Meliorn. They were talking in hushed voices.

Alec had to admire the stylists' work on them. Their outfits represented their personalities quite well. Meliorn had a revealing transparent white shirt that dipped low enough for Alec to see his navel. His hair had coloured blue strikes and of course peeking under his dress pants were a set of high silver heels. Alec had to admit it. He looked really handsome, and it made Alec flush a little. The gemstones adorning Meliorn looked rich and exquisite.

"Apparently we're not really supposed to talk but I wanted to say y'all look really good." Kaelie looked like a pixie. Her blonde hair was cut short and they had given her a shimmering layer of silver on her skin.

He nodded in acknowledgement. They waited and waited. Every time one wanted to say something they were silenced by a peacekeeper hitting their staff against the floor. The other tributes arrived one after the other and more waiting ensued. Meliorn was leaning against the walls. Lydia had kicked off her shoes for the time being. The female tribute of district 7 had decided to sit on the ground, regardless of whether her dress might get creased. There was movement in the other rooms next to them and everything sprung more to life as the minutes passed. Lot of noise was getting heard. Alec assumed they had been waiting for over an hour when finally the screens in the corridors sprung to life.

Theresa Gray was talking, her white dress was ridiculously long and almost entirely made of lace. It looked indeed like Ragnor's craftsmanship. The walls slid and folded open to give space to an opening to the set. On first glance at the screen the audience was keeping quiet unless she said something worth applauding for or when she made a joke worth laughing at. Things were then set in motion extremely fast.

Tessa then finally announced what the audience was clearly waiting for: the interviews with the tributes. Kaelie's name was called and with enthusiastic applause from Tessa, the spectators roared. It was incredible. Now that the doors and walls were open you could hear the screaming as if you were already right in front of it. It made Alec's nervousness bloom into his stomach. He didn't feel remotely ready.

Tessa sat down in front of Kaelie, complimenting her dress and shine. Their banter was friendly, witty and Kaelie made the whole public laugh pretty easily. She made remarks about how good she was with claws and fist weapons. How Alicante was welcoming and how much she loved sleeping in a bed bigger than her. She explained she loved to make jokes and using her wits in situations of stress and danger.

Tessa thanked her and encouraged the audience to a tremendous acclaim. Kaelie was escorted out toward the other end of the set. Meliorn was called. Of course his approach was flirty, warm and relaxed. It even had made Tessa blush and giggle. He also indulged the audience when they had requested a dance from him. They were all hanging from his lips. And body.

Hard to live up to that once the buzzer rang to tell them his time on screen was over. Lydia steeled herself and went up there. Her name was chanted. Her determined face reassured him she would be fine. She was clear, strict, and said she really would have loved a dress like Tessa's.

"Tell me, Lydia is there someone back in 2 for you to come home to ?" Lydia's face closed off. It tore at Alec's bones. He knew, they both had known, this question had been coming for her. He wasn't sure he wanted to listen. He didn't feel like listening. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall crossing his arms; He didn't want to watch her deliver the lines.

"There was someone." Her voice didn't waver, didn't show any of the true pain. "His name was John, my fiancée." The audience became quiet. Lydia took a deep breath, "He died." The spectators gasped; she was playing them so well. It made Alec shiver. He inhaled, listening to the rest of her sentence. "But before he did I promised him something." Everybody was quiet now. You could have heard a needle fall upon the ground. "I promised him I would volunteer and win the games. That we would become rich, famous. That I would marry him and that I would be wearing the most expensive wedding dress ever made."

The lie was so poignant, and the audience ate it all up with a golden spoon. The truth wasn't theirs to know. His heart was straining. The face of Max his in hospital gown was floating before his eyes. It sucked, this whole feeling sucked.

"I am here to fulfil that promise, for John. The one man I ever truly loved." It occurred to Alec that this was probably the truest thing that would have been said on stage tonight. The sniffling from Tessa was loud.

"What a touching story, Lydia, thank you for sharing." The public hummed and agreed. "We wish you good luck and I hope you'll keep true to your promise." He could hear Lydia smirk. "There is something you should know, Tessa. I always fulfil my promises."

The applause was clear, cheering, her name was chanted. It was thunderous and strong. Lydia had won over the public in just a few words. But also thanks to real emotions. The perfectly rehearsed lines had been delivered perfectly. Lydia was leading the game by far for now. It was deadly.

"He is dark, mysterious, one of the only two tributes who got an 11 to their training scores, his name is Alexander but prefers to be called Alec, please welcome him, Alec Lightwood."

He opened his eyes when there was a small push in his back. He looked at the fourteen- or maybe fifteen-year-old female tribute from district 3. "It's your turn," she whispered. Tessa was looking at him and he found himself startled awake that it was indeed his turn.

He inhaled and made his way forward. The lights were blinding. He made an effort to walk the way Catarina had told him to. 'Head high, chin up, don't try to smile it doesn't work'. Tessa greeted him with a handshake. He sat down on the round chair in front of her. The audience was quickly shushed into quietness.

"Good evening, Alec, I'm glad to have you here with us." He didn't reply to that, which is why she queued to her next question as she read on the notes in her hands. She had laced gloves on. "So a score of 11… the only other tribute with a score this high is Aline Penhallow this year." One particular person in the audience exclaimed a whistle. Tessa smiled at where the sound came from. "Tell us more about that."

He leaned a bit more forward. "Well we can't really disclose what happens during our private showing, so I can't tell you much." He noticed that in the distance there was a platform floating above the ground floor audience. He couldn't distinguish who was sitting there but it looked like an important crowd. Perhaps sponsors and gamemakers that had decided to pay the VIP lounge because they 'deserved it'. So he directed his gaze at them.

"Let's just say that I made a display of my skills that won't soon be forgotten. It was pretty lethal. I'm from district 2, I tend to live up to every expectation that comes with it. If not better." It was strange to hear his voice echo over a crowd. He had tried to keep his voice neutral enough. He didn't want to sound too arrogant. It was more of a 'matter of fact' tone.

Tessa nodded in agreement. "That is making us curious, isn't it folks." Not enough people seemed to agree. He had to step up his game.

"Is there anything you can tell us about what you are good at ?" Alec cocked his head at Tessa.

He tried to concentrate on her face, but he didn't want his expression to turn into a scowl either. The lights were extremely bright. "Nothing that I would want to divulge just like that. I have many skills. My body is trained and built to endure a lot of things. It's why I volunteered this year, I was ready for it and I wanted to, since it was my last year to prove that district 2 can yet again be a winner of these games."

The audience seemed to like that. Tessa picked up on it. "Indeed it does, so what will make you different from the others?" Now this was question he liked. He relaxed his shoulders and made eye contact with her.

"I believe in these games," he inhaled, still trying to look composed and self-reflective: "In district 2 we have a saying, one that encompasses exactly what I feel and how we should all feel about the hunger games. They have, after all, a bigger purpose than many of us will ever understand. The uprising is something that needed to be punished. The games were created in honour of that. I justly if not honourably stand before you now, before Alicante, before you all, offering everything that I have for you. I abide a strong, judging and executioning hand over everything I do. I do what needs to be done. Promises are filled with deeds, not just words. I firmly believe these games are a way forward to accept our mistakes and take responsibility. It's in this mindset that I volunteered. I'm here to commemorate the accords that had been made so many years ago. It's the greatest honour I could ever pay to my district, Alicante and even my family. 'Dura lex sed lex', those words have guided me here today and I feel steadfast and unbreakable as I share those important words with you today : The law is hard but it is the law."

People hummed so approvingly, it was music to his ears, there were even cheers. He had been able to pique the audience's interest. People murmured amongst each other enthusiastically. He saw the people in the first row nod and write things down on their holopads. This had gone superbly. It surely was enough for them to choose him if his words resonated with them.

"That was a beautiful speech, wasn't it folks ?" The crowd responded to Tessa favourably. The twinkle in her grey eyes was so telling. She wasn't allowed to place bets at all during the games. But he was almost certain he had won her over.

"One last thing, if you'll indulge me, Alec, before you go. Tell me about the ring you're wearing."

The question almost made him freeze. He felt his limbs become unbelievably heavy. He tilted his hand to show the audience what she was talking about. People made inquisitive noises. He didn't want to share but he had to now. He even asked if it was 'this' she meant. She nodded enthusiastically. His mouth ran dry. His eyes fell upon the roughly made and a slightly crooked adamas 'L'.

"This is the Lightwood family ring," he didn't want to talk about it. He closed off his face. He didn't want to talk about it but he knew, he physically knew, he couldn't antagonise her. He opened his mouth.

"It was a ring I crafted with Jace." It was the first time he talked about Jace out loud ever since he arrived. He hadn't uttered his name since he had last seen him in the town hall in district 2. It didn't feel like it had its place right now. It didn't feel right mentioning it now. It felt like revealing their little secret was something that had been laying so heavy on his heart. He however didn't want to look hesitant; to look insecure, to seem like he was thinking too hard.

"He is…" _– His heart ached –_ "…my best friend." He looked at Tessa, surprised it didn't hurt as much as it would have done a few days ago. He felt cold sweat and some tension, but the dread, the pain ? For the first time ever it didn't feel as if he was going to be crushed by it. It was exposing, but it didn't feel bad or wrong. For the first time in forever he felt lighter, liberated, at peace. Jace had been so important to him. And still was. But for the first time ever, it wasn't like _that._ It wasn't as if he was hiding nor that he was lying to himself. For the first time ever Alec felt as if it wasn't something he needed to lie about. He even felt confidence grow from this truth. Jace was everything he had lived for. Until now. Now Alec was living for himself and for what he believed in. He was imbued with a strength, a self-worth and reassurance. By uttering those words he finally felt ready to explore and discover what he existed for.

He smirked at Tessa, she looked surprised: "I won't tell much about it yet, Tessa, but I can make a promise. If you all will agree to it of course ?" The nodding of the audience was very verbal and the acclaims were loud. "Once I win the games I'll tell you the whole story behind it."

The audience eagerly started clapping. The buzzer resonated. Tessa stood up and shook his hand, she shouted his name so that everyone would yell their support one last time before he exited the set.

Lydia was waiting for him. The sound muffled as the wall panels slid shut. It left them alone with both Meliorn and Kaelie who hadn't reacted to him coming in. Meliorn was sitting on the floor braiding parts of his hair. Kaelie had her eyes glued to the screen. Lydia put her arms around Alec. It was comforting. There were no cameras here. Of course they would be watched, there were several peacekeepers guarding them. But right now the games had been set to a halt. She whispered to him that it had been okay and that they had all loved it. She said all kinds of things that didn't really make sense to him. That she was proud and that she supported him. He said the same for her. Her embrace became tighter. When the peacekeeper coughed, an implicit way to say they were to stop hugging, they broke free from each other's arms.

Another screen was displaying what was being shown on stage, Kaelie had been watching the whole time. The girl from district 3 was talking enthusiastically about the newest gadgets and technology that had come out in Alicante. Tessa was able to steer her back toward the games. She talked about her trap making skills and the fact that she was pretty confident she would be able to at least catch a few of the other tributes if needed. When Tessa suggested it would mean that it would be easier for her to kill. The girl looked horrified. Her mouth hung open and in a very sincere voice she said 'it would be very mean.' Which made the audience laugh. Tessa steered it as being a good joke and made her answer a strength. But clearly the tribute hadn't meant it that way.

"Hopefully she'll die fast." Meliorn said it out loud. It could have disturbed them, they might have felt bad or even disquieted, but they were all thinking it: A tribute that wasn't in the arena to kill was a dead tribute. Tessa made another joke and then she bid the girl goodbye. They didn't react when she arrived. They didn't even look at her.

Kirk Duplesse was announced next, Alec noticed how she perked up. The boy's presentation was charming, he even sang a song for the audience because Tessa had complimented him for his voice. Singing was highly forbidden. He would probably be punished for it. Alec wondered if the boy would be the gamemakers' first target to pour their wrath over. The audience cheered and loved him. Tessa didn't need to steer him, he talked enough for the two of them. District 4 was next. Aline indeed used her mother's fame and more. She was by far the audience's favourite. Sebastian didn't use his connection to Aline to get his time to shine in the spotlight. He was soft and humorous. He even blushed at well timed moments. Alec thought it was superbly played. One after the other they went on the stage, trying to get sponsors, shine in the audience's eyes.

The blonde girl from 6, Heidi Mckenzie, creeped Alec out. She laughed a bit too sweetly, kept her answers too hidden. She evaded questions and left people wanting more. She was different from in the training room like day and night. The people seemed to like her regardless. It reminded Alec of Camille Belcourt, the former mentor of district 6. Raphael Santiago had visibly found a good angle for the girl. The spectators liked her despite the weird vibe she was giving off.

Alec also took note of the female tribute of district 10. She looked lethal, sounded lethal. District 10 had the habit of creating strong female tributes. This tribute was no exception. She had been scored at the top together with them, with a number of 10. Maybe she was to be eliminated first; of all the others she seemed like the one that could present the biggest threat. He let his eyes trail over the screen when the last tribute of 12 exited the stage. The others were expendable.

Tessa was giving a speech on how exciting every tribute had been. She switched between smiles and jokes and very learned details about the games. Suddenly she asked everyone to be silent. She was comically putting her finger on her lips. The audience shushed its other members around them until it was quiet again. She was getting some information in her earpiece.

Alec turned toward Lydia who shrugged. What was happening ?

"May I ask for every tribute to come back to the stage again."

Before Alec realised it they were escorted back onto the stage, district by district. Lydia refused his arm to walk back on the small steps toward it. They all looked inquisitively at each other but since the audience wasn't making any sound they didn't dare to talk either.

"I have a pleasure to present to you all…" Alec's gut churned, feeling the words coming before they were even said. "Magnus Bane, Head gamemaker."

The whole audience gasped and the lights shifted. Most people turned around, even leaving their seats so they could take a better look at the floating platform. There he was, the light spot was shining brightly on him. He was standing up in the middle of a sitting crowd. Alec couldn't keep his eyes from the man. People's voices were deafening, their screams of delight killing any notion of other sounds. More and more people stood up, wanting to get a glimpse.

"Thank you Tessa, you're being a perfect host as always."

The voice was of a deep timbre that made him shiver instantly. It felt like a warm liquid was being poured over him. There was a tingly sensation around his scalp. Goosebumps were appearing all over him. Alec released the air he'd been holding up in his lungs. It felt like he couldn't actually properly breathe. Or think.

"It's been a fantastical evening so far."

The audience acquiesced vocally and some clapping was heard. Alec thought about how the man had looked at him while gesturing the arrow downwards. How the movements had looked graceful and so controlled. Those golden, gleaming eyes; Alec hadn't had to lie to himself: He had been thinking about them since last night. He found himself trying to close off his emotions. He didn't want his troubled mind and feelings appear on his face. He turned his adamas ring a few times around his finger and then decided to cross his hands behind his back. His by default and drilled in soldier demeanour kicked in. He couldn't let himself be fazed, not while the cameras could be watching. He had to stay in control. And yet.

And yet his heart was hammering inside of his chest.

Magnus Bane lifted one hand and the audience quieted down instantly. The amount of power this simple gesture contained was enough to make fear bloom inside anyone's head. To be able to silence with a mere gesture ? It meant respect. It meant control. It meant leadership.

Alec couldn't breathe.

"I have an exciting announcement to make. Dear tributes," his voice was sly, coy. Alec noticed the head gamemaker was using the pause to make sure everyone was carefully listening to him. Alec felt a flush creep up his neck. His body was strained with tension.

"It is with immense pleasure that I will be inviting you all into my home for a last supper, a party. A last night full of festivities before the real big event starts. Of course, the people who have paid extra tonight are invited as well, just show your invite at the door." The erupted collective roar was terrifying. People were hollering their lungs out. The sound was ear-splitting terrifying.

"I hope to see you all tonight."

The lights went dramatically out.

And Alec still couldn't fucking breathe.


	11. Chapter 7

"How exciting," Hypatia hadn't stopped talking ever since they had put their feet back into the training centre. "This is the reason why we always create more pieces than necessary. It's because head gamemakers always pull stunts like these. Bane is just known for doing this kind of thing." She continued on talking to Lydia about how she was going to be dressed in the three-piece suit she had designed. She practically dragged the tribute upstairs while still talking continuously.

Elias put himself to work instantly, this time asking for the boxes to be brought upstairs to Alec's room. Hodge had excused himself right before they had gotten to their floor. He needed something from the medical centre. For the rest Alec, Catarina and Ragnor were silently standing around. Ragnor had asked one of the silent brothers for a glass of wine and was patiently waiting for it.

"I don't have the time to change but I guess it will not be a big deal if I wear to wear the same dress to the party." Catarina didn't sound bothered. "Unless you've got a spare dress for me Ragnor ?"

The head stylist turned around with the glass of wine in his hand. "Absolutely, I always come prepared. Ask Hypatia for the pink one. She'll fix you right up." Catarina kissed Ragnor's cheek and went upstairs.

Alec ? Alec didn't know what to feel. He hadn't said anything during the ride back. He felt a bit lost in contemplation. It was a lot to take in. The private party was hosted in one of Magnus Bane's mansions. Because the man had not one but several. They had two hours to prepare and apparently it had been the most unplanned and impulsive decision of the day. Alec didn't know how to understand this. How could someone make this kind of decision so freely, so unmediated ? Being this unpredictable ? He couldn't fathom how it worked.

"How…" he looked up at Ragnor who was scrutinising him from behind his glass of wine. "How does he do that ?" Alec asked. He wasn't sure how to phrase it differently. He wasn't even sure if Ragnor would even understand what he was trying to say.

Ragnor drank from his glass and sighed. "Magnus is Magnus." He gave his empty glass to a silent brother who fetched him another one. "He is whimsical, impetuous and absolutely full of himself. I've known him for longer than I can even remember and I don't believe his self-control has changed since we were teenagers. It got to his head. It has gotten even worse since he became head gamemaker. The fame, the art, the people. He makes everyone envious, jealous, and if 'you don't want to be him, you want to be on him' as the tabloids say around here."

Alec frowned at this comment. His gut was twisting in a knot. The feeling was a warning sign that he had to be on his guard. Magnus Bane didn't feel safe. Anyone who could be that kind of a loose cannon wasn't safe.

"Not a lot of people see the man behind the title. But that's what it is all about. If you can control the masses, their idea of you, the image you project ? Then you have power over the whole wide world around here. You were probably asking why he so impulsively decided to throw a party ? The answer is simple: Because he can. Because he is Asmodeus' son. Because he is Magnus Bane. He owns, controls, and rules over the games."

Ragnor played with his freshly refilled glass of wine. He was visibly very intrigued by Alec's question. The tribute had yet to see the head stylist be so earnest about someone. "Not the answer you were hoping for ?"

Alec shook his head. "Not that, I'm just surprised that the head gamemaker can be so… Careless ?" Ragnor started laughing and Alec felt taken for a fool. He crossed his arms, displeased.

"I think that Magnus is a lot of things, arrogant, self-serviceable, loyal if you're in his inner circle, eccentric. But careless ? Magnus Bane is never careless. He thinks things through thoroughly. At any time if you ask him why he is doing the things he does, he will, if not always, give you an explanation for why he does it. He might trick you into thinking that there is this huge mystery about him. But once he lets you in, he is a very earnest man who is persuaded he does things for the greater good. Whether his decisions are always the right ones ? That I cannot say. Magnus likes to play around on the edge. But he would never do something that would actively harm people."

'And yet he is a head gamemaker for the games of hunger.' Alec didn't realise he had said this out loud until he saw Ragnor lose his smile instantly. The stylist's face took a very sombre gaze.

"I have talked with him about that, numerous times even. I can only hope that one day he will see reason." Ragnor's voice sounded so sad. Alec's heart strained unwillingly. It had just been a statement, not a rebellious comment. It was just a matter of fact. People died in the games, this was how they were designed. This was how responsibilities were taken. He didn't understand the stylist's position on the games and somehow, the way that Ragnor was reacting, made Alec sad.

"Why ?"

Ragnor's looked up from wherever his mind wandered. He finished his glass and completely dismissed Alec's question : "Doesn't matter. Come I'll get you dressed, Elias will probably get pissed at us for the loss of time we've taken downstairs."

They were back in one of the driverless cars. But this time both the escort, mentor and prep team were allowed to share the ride with them. The night had already fallen over Alicante by the time they departed the training centre.

"Is there any curfew ?" Lydia's hairdo looked less complicated than for their interview. They had also made her change perfume.

"Midnight or a bit after, usually you'll have a peacekeeper standing next to you asking you to accompany them." Hodge joked. Alec didn't want to mention it but he had seen the man take something before they left. It had looked like some kind of medicinal tablets. Since then the mentor had been more awake and more relaxed. Even his humorous tone was back.

"The game plan here is to attract sponsors. To mingle. You need to get them to like you. The bare minimum is to be sure they remember you and that you leave a good impression. The rest will be up to Hodge since he can seal sponsor deals." Catarina added. The dress she had changed into looked like water upon her blue skin. It wouldn't have fitted Lydia at all.

"Alternatively they find one of the biggest sponsors in the room and charm them to be on their sides, right ?" said Hypatia, she had switched eye accessories. It was as if she had no irises anymore. It was strange enough that Alec didn't like looking at her.

"That would be correct," Catarina confirmed. "I'll try to find who it is as fast as possible so that you don't have to be nice too long toward total strangers. I know some of us don't like playing pleasantries at all." She winked at Alec. He returned with a nod. He couldn't imagine himself talking with people during the whole day. He knew how to be nice. But charming people was completely outside of his skill range and comfort zone.

The car stopped. Alec felt excitement rise in his body as he got out. It was more crowded than he had anticipated. The cars were coming and going. He wasn't sure where exactly they had to proceed to until he realised that a huge part of the garden they were standing at was actually part of the mansion. Catarina took him by the arm and invited him to walk. The big ring of trees was the most green he had ever seen in one place. Pink flower petals were falling from them. When Alec reached out to catch one it went right through his hand. They were holographic. The bushes and flowers were laid out in swirling patterns. How was it even possible for them to be made into that shape ? It looked not natural but artificial. However, the smell indicated that they were in fact real bushes. Alec was looking everywhere in wonder until he saw what would make his heart stop.

So much water. There was so much water. Stone statues were pouring it from glass and stone vials and other cups. The water landed in some kind of basin with multicoloured fish. Did the people come here to bathe ? To drink ? What was the purpose of something like this ? Lydia had taken a step forward to it as well. Some people were sitting on the stone edge around it.

"What is this ?" he asked, not sure if he were allowed to approach this water pouring thing. It looked magnificent. The resonation of the water falling and joining the basin area around the statue was something he had never heard before. It was impressive and had a strange beauty. He realised he really liked the sound of it.

"What ? The fountain ?" Hypatia asked. Alec looked at her and nodded. Her mouth parted and closed again. She could visibly not find the words to describe it.

"It's for decoration," said Hodge. He approached Alec and Lydia. His face was a bit darker. His mood shifting to what sounded like disdain. "It's purely there, because it's pretty."

Alec almost recoiled from what had been said. The words tracing the line of his lips were akin to: how was it possible ? So much water ? Wasted ? Used for the sole purpose of embellishment ? It was as if his head couldn't follow the train of thoughts as he spoke them. It was as if his mind started racing in every direction. How 'wrong' it was. How 'impossible' it was. Water, the one element that was so hard to come by. Water, the one thing that was restricted in district 2 to a few litres per person a day. Water, the one thing you never had enough of. Water, you'd never share it with others unless they were close to you. Water, the one thing rookies would get beaten up over until you learned to defend yourself. Water, the only real thing you would exchange your tesserae for. This was revolting.

Alec had understood the showers, had understood the appeal of them, had understood it had been a luxury, something you treated yourself with. They had a use, a purpose. This ? This wasn't logical, it didn't make sense. It didn't mean anything. The capitol gave more reserves of water every time a new victor of the district was crowned. Alec had understood it as one of the biggest privileges given to the districts. It was something exclusive, something you could be proven worthy of. But that was because they had all the water in the world over here. He felt mocked, ridiculed, deceived…

He felt disgusted.

"I know what you are thinking. But if you wanted to have an image on what Alicante is, this is it. Right there."

The sentence lingered. He didn't want to move. The beauty of this fountain had faded to make place for the monstrosity it actually was. How was it possible that anybody didn't feel like running away from it. He watched as Lydia sat on the stone edge of the basin. She put her hand into the water. Alec was tugged forward by Catarina. She murmured that they had to move on if they still wanted to make it to the party.

The steps of the stone stairs were just like everything around him, unnecessarily big. The mansion was greater and wider than the town hall in district 2. People were dressed in all kinds of eccentric attire. Alec tuned them out. He didn't want to be here anymore. Regardless of the luxuries, the food, the sponsors or even the people. He noticed upon entering that more than a few silent brothers were standing in rows with possible refreshments and other delicacies. He didn't want to look at their disturbing faces so he looked away to look at the room.

The room in itself was as big as the training floor's apartment. There were people everywhere. Eclectic music was playing in the background. People made their ways between sitting spaces and a huge buffet of hors-d'oeuvres like Catarina was saying. There were fruits, drinks, baked goods. Smells of all kinds and moving sculptures displaying different kinds of drinks and pieces of meat but Alec should get closer to it if he wanted to take in more details. There were visibly a lot of people that knew each other already. The conversations were lively and laughs were fading in and out. A few tributes were sticking to the buffet, others were next to their mentors.

Ragnor took off almost immediately. He picked up two drinks from the tray of a silent brother and waltzed his way in between people and groups in an expert manner and with such fluidity it was hard not to notice him. He kissed people on cheeks here and there, shook hands and embraced others. Alec couldn't see which or whom his target destination was until the last moment. He stiffened. Not entirely certain he saw correctly whom Ragnor was talking to. The stylist didn't kiss him, embrace him or shook his hands. No, Ragnor simply offered the second drink in his hand. His posture and body language was nothing like Alec had seen from the stylist before. Ragnor just seemed to beam with some kind of genuine happiness to see his new conversational partner. The man was dressed in a midnight blue suit with a black shirt that had the first two buttons undone. He was smaller than Ragnor. His skin looked sleek and well groomed, if not a little pale.

"That's Raphael Santiago," Catarina told Alec. Alec didn't look away. It was fascinating to see how Ragnor seemed to be absolutely engrossed into whatever the mentor of district 6 had to say to him. While it didn't look like he had a lot to say, Ragnor always responded with a nod. It was as if they were drawn to each other.

"Whatever you're thinking, the answer is yes." Catarina disengaged their arms. "Now if you don't mind I'm gonna find us the big target for tonight. Enjoy the food. Be friendly. Small reminder that you are not supposed to pick any fights with the other tributes. It could be even better actually if you don't talk to them at all. Sponsors don't like groups. They prefer sponsoring individuals. In the end there can only be one victor in the game."

She turned on her heels and her elaborated ponytail flew around her waist. It reminded Alec of his mother. Lydia came to stand beside him. Hodge had murmured a few things in her ears as well before he went away. She looked as pissed as Alec was feeling inside.

"The water was warm," she was looking at her wet hand. "Hodge said that in the houses in the victors' village there were baths and that even from the sink you could get warm water without needing to boil it." She sounded troubled and annoyed. However he could hear in her voice how much wonder there still was. He understood. It was a nice thing to look forward to. The reward of being a victor was significantly high, even though he started to feel bitter about it. Hodge living at the institute instead of his home made a lot of sense now.

He followed Lydia to the buffet.

Alec hadn't seen some of the things that had been displayed before. Since the only times they were allowed to eat meat in district 2 was during Remembrance Day and the birthday of Lord Asmodeus, he decided that he could take the opportunity. There were things like duck and lamb and more roasted dishes. He had never been able to have those before. It tasted good with the honey-like sauce. He felt easily satisfied; it tasted really refined. He didn't like the feeling of overeating so he stopped when he realised he was at his second plate.

He made his way to the side of the room. Lots of eyes were trailing him but none of the owners were coming to talk to him. Perhaps he was the one supposed to take initiative. He kept the unease from showing on his face and looked at the different guests all around him. They looked and felt so different from him. It was weird to think that in a few days he would become one of them. He studied the faces to see if he recognised any other victors but Hodge had told him there weren't many who liked that kind of festivities. He had an itch to maybe go and talk to Raphael Santiago. Alec had admired his participation of the games. But both of his tributes were around him now; Ragnor was still at his side. Which would be his angle to introduce himself. Maybe once this was all over…

"Alec Lightwood." He was interrupted in his thoughts by the woman next to him. She was clearly an older version of Aline. Her greying temples and a few wrinkles gave away that she was the mother and not the daughter.

"Jia Penhallow," he answered. She held a glass of blue liquid in hand.

"Very impressive interview, if my interest wasn't to get my daughter sponsors you would have had my vote this year." He didn't know how to react. He didn't like the idea to be cocky or even to pretend to be humble. He didn't want to say that if her daughter didn't survive there was always space for sponsoring him.

"Same could be said of your daughter, she has amazing skills, both socially as well as everything I've seen in the training centre so far. You trained her well. She has the wits of her mother. Which makes her a formidable opponent." Flattery seemed to work. Jia's face was already less stern looking. She genuinely appreciated the compliment he had given her.

"I must say that when Aline had told me that you were proficient with a feather-staff I was surprised. It's a rather blunt weapon and not easily recreated in the arena. For it to earn an '11' on your evaluation score it must have been an impressive display of skills." Alec realised he felt comfortable in this kind of conversation so he turned himself to face the mentor fully now. This was one of the few topics he really liked to talk about.

"I'm quite good with daggers too. There are easily always some of those in the arena. They are also light and you can have quite the number of them on yourself if you are smart in your use of them." Jia smirked at him as she drank from her glass. It smelled of alcohol.

"It's mostly dependant on whether the gamemakers are generous enough, but I'm not telling you anything new there. Hodge must have told you enough of this already." He didn't really, but Alec understood the underlying comment of it. There had been hunger games were the tributes had only been given needles or blunt weapons to fight with each other. Those had been the earlier games when a lot of tributes mostly survived by outliving the other. Things were different now.

"Important advice not to be overlooked." He answered; The mentor nodded slowly. Alec felt as if he had won her over. The best he could at least. She was, after all, a legend.

He was confirmed in his thoughts when with another smirk she bid him goodbye : "I like you Mr. Lightwood. I'll be looking forward to the upcoming fights in the arena, good luck."

He shot an 'all the pleasure was mine.' Before he watched her walk away. That hadn't gone as bad as it could have been. Since the area around him had quieted down he realised some people had watched or even listened to their interaction. He hoped he had performed favourably. He saw in the distance Catarina who was gesturing toward him to approach. She was talking to a woman a few decades older. Her roots to district 2 were unmistakably present. She didn't have any cosmetic enhancement and Alec recognised her stern, intimidating and harsh demeanour as the kind of body language to be expected from a head or a former head peacekeeper. Her almost colourless blonde hair was held up in a bun. Even her suit was grey and had a simple cut. Alec wondered why he hadn't seen her yet.

He approached them, Catarina's body language seemed to mirror the woman's. She was physically more distant than usual. Upon his arrival in the social circle, Catarina moved to the side.

"Dear Imogen, let me present you to Alec, my new charge." Alec purposefully didn't extend his hand. If he had read right and the woman was indeed from district 2, she would preferably be greeted like a district 2 official. He laid his right fist on the left side of his chest and he bowed his head. The contented huff made it clear he had made the right call.

"At ease," Imogen ordered. Alec relaxed himself in his soldier stance. Now this was an interaction he felt ready and prepared for.

"So, Alexander Lightwood, tribute of district 2 ? Strength and valour are your strong suit, if I asses correctly what I have heard and seen from your private showing." She was caressing her chin. It reminded Alec of the supervisors and inquisitors that would often come to the institute to evaluate the tributes and peacekeepers-in-making. He was taller than her so he tried not to make eye contact since it was considered rude, especially if you did it toward a superior.

"If you were present at the private sessions, ma'am, then there is little for me to say about myself as I'm certain you have already reviewed my interview." He kept his tone neutral. Facts and deeds were the ruling morale. He had to stay in line at all cost if he wanted this to go as smoothly as possible.

"I saw it as an act of insubordination." She cut in almost right after he finished his sentence. "Or maybe a desperate cry for attention ?" He felt himself fidget around his ring. She couldn't see it anyway. He considered his words carefully when he answered her.

"Maybe it was a necessary evil, I condemn my own behaviour as it was. It was a poor show of discipline." There was no denying he had been impulsive. That it hadn't been exemplary. But he knew that deep down it had been a good thing. He continued :

"However I cannot unsee how it has brought back attention to the matters that were at hand at the time it happened." It wasn't often he had to defend his behaviour but his mother had drilled him enough and taught him how to do it correctly. He just had to yet again hammer on values and doctrine.

"These games; as I already stated before; are a symbol of prowess and glory. I wouldn't want to see them tarnished as a matter of mere entertainment." She raised her eyebrows. He couldn't read her if she had been impressed or if she thought him being petulant. He felt calm. He was used to this. He was used to being on this kind of social hierarchy. For the first time since he arrived he felt like he actually knew what he was doing from A-Z.

"Ah yes, Magnus' disregard of the games has been something that has troubled me more than once. But strangely enough, he was always able to bring the games the honour it is due. Regardless of his…", she lingered, "choices and demeanour. It encompasses great skill and endurance to always bring these games to their greatness. On any other day he is a role model to be followed." The way she was steering the conversation told Alec that his apology was accepted. His motives were clear and since he had already condemned himself she probably hadn't felt the need to chastise him any further. He kept himself from smiling. This was a victory.

"I only seek to respect what the people before me have built and made this society thrive. I am only here to follow the law as it has been written." She liked his answer. He could physically feel it. The dynamic between them, the social aura shifted even though her facial expression didn't change.

"If push comes to shove dear Alec, what would a soldier need for him to fulfil the duties as a participant and volunteer for the games of hunger ?" There it was. He could hear Catarina smirk beside him. He lowered his face to appear humble.

"Ma'am there is but one thing I would request as sponsorship. A bow." If he was able to secure a bow he'd be able to not only win these games but even surpass them. He didn't want a bow, he _needed_ the bow. He needed it so he could be at his best. He needed it because as an archer it was the only way where he could honour his skill righteously. He wanted to conquer, he wanted to exceed expectations, he wanted to efficient, satisfactory. He only could do that if he had a bow.

"Interesting," her voice didn't betray what she really thought.

"A soldier doesn't need anything else as he is trained to survive. He knows what his true inner purpose is. He knows how to fulfil his function, his purpose. He adapts if needed even, until he gets to his next assignment. He has learned to rule with his head, not with his heart." Every word sounded so true. It felt good to be able to lay them out. It felt good to be himself in the eccentric and unknown environment Alicante had been since he had arrived. It was uplifting to finally talk with someone besides Lydia who understood. Imogen visibly picked up on it and agreed.

"I like you, Mr. Lightwood," she nodded, "May your luck and skill serve you well in these games. You'll see if you have indeed convinced me enough to give you my support. "

He was dismissed. He bowed his head and immediately took his leave. It was how it was done in 2. He didn't know where to go so he just walked in the opposite direction to another room. A few seconds later Catarina joined him. Her grin was painted all over her face. His heart had beaten so fast.

"It couldn't have gone more smoothly, well done Alec, I think she even liked you." She grasped his arm to accentuate how happy she was with his work. Alec exhaled. He was okay, he was safe. He was in a very good position right there. Imogen had seemed important.

"That was easy, yet also stressful. Was she an important sponsor ?" Catarina suddenly got really excited.

"Yes absolutely, that was Imogen Herondale," Herondale like Will ? The head trainer at the centre ? Catarina nodded at his questions. "She is the head inquisitor of district 2, she has a lot of influence here in Alicante. She is the boss of your boss of your boss. She even has the ear of several other important sponsors and district 2 allies. Getting her support ? ...This is big Alec, really big."

He felt himself flush, his cheeks were getting hot. Her enthusiasm was intoxicating. He didn't want to cry out in victory just yet. Imogen hadn't said yes and he still had to prove himself. But he had succeeded into letting her notice him.

"Hopefully it isn't because I look a lot like her relative;" He had believed himself strong and prized himself on having had the skills to pull off this sponsorship, but the insecurity was gripping him suddenly. So he started to ask;

"No, I didn't let her meet Raj last year, because he wasn't like you. She wouldn't have liked his angle," she interrupted him. 'Is this the reason why he had failed the games then ?' was an unbidden question on Alec's lips but he didn't dare to ask. He didn't want to believe that sponsors were the sole reason why you survived the games. You needed the prowess and courage. Of which Raj didn't have enough of either since he didn't even get ranked third in the last hunger games.

"Where is Mark Blackthorn ?" Alec hadn't seen last year's victor anywhere. Catarina stopped in her tracks. He wondered if she had even heard his question since she didn't immediately reply to him. He saw her eyes trailing everywhere as if to make sure no one was listening in. It didn't alarm him yet. He frowned when she leaned up to his ear to answer in a quiet voice.

"He was indisposed to come to Alicante this season." Alec wanted to ask why but knew better. There was probably a good reason why and it was clearly not his to know. Unease crept up his spine. A silent brother was looking at the both of them. It had its head turned toward them. The dread caught in his gut and he wanted this conversation to be finished as soon as possible.

"Is there anyone else I should talk to ?" He asked dryly, trying to shake off his shiver. The silent brother was quite visibly still observing them. Catarina looked pleased with the change of subject.

"We got the most powerful fish in the room. I already got wind of the fact that you had a talk with Jia Penhallow. Hodge told me over AR a few minutes ago that he got approached by others because of your visible alliance with district 4. It had been a good move for both sides." While she talked she displayed, on her Augmented Reality holopad, the messages that Hodge had sent to her.

"What about district 1 ?" Alec asked. Both Meliorn and Kaelie had agreed to be allies. But the way Catarina's nose crunched into a frown it made him wonder if it had been a smart decision.

"I absolutely detest Iris Rouse and the feeling is mutual. I don't like her methods and she doesn't strike me at all as someone that'd like your angle. We know when to ally ourselves. But trust me, this year isn't one of those times." She waved away the hologram of her messages.

"It won't be harmful to me if I still get with the usual 1 and 2 alliance, right ?" Catarina shook her head. He hadn't noticed the necklace she was wearing until now. It was a small white stone that reflected all kinds of colours.

"Ideally you had allied yourself with the female tribute of district 10. You both seem very alike personality-wise. But Cleophas won't budge. She never has. She likes her tributes without any alliances because it's how she did it during her games. She also inherently believes that greatest strength you have comes from within and not through groups. 'In the games you're on your own and you'll die alone', like she always says." Alec couldn't argue. It made a lot of sense. There could be only one victor.

Alec watched how two people in a corner were serving themselves from the dessert buffet. "I'm going to scout around again, see if I can give Lydia a good deal. If there is anything else I need you for, I'll come to find you." He nodded to her and said an earnest 'thank you' for her work.

He was once again alone. This room was like all the others. Crowded, luxurious. There was furniture and rich tapestries everywhere. People were still in groups. Some of them were swaying to the music coming from a different room. People looked more engrossed in their conversations here. He approached the dessert buffet. There was more fruit and all kinds of cakes displayed. A lot of orange and yellow colours. There were some deep purple colours as well, mostly decorations. There were dark pies that had red smooth textures inside and small glasses with vicious black and bright blue liquids inside. Apples had been put on sticks and coated with glazy substances. Other sticks were coated with fluffy cloudlike material. There were large bowls of candy in various shapes and sizes, all of them wrapped in neon wrappers. Most of the desserts that looked intricate were cold but there was a huge pile of waffles in the corner. Alec had tasted one two mornings ago, it had been amazing with some fruit. 'Maybe for later,' he thought.

He let his hand reach out to one of the candy bowls. He hadn't tried a lot of them but he knew there were different flavours in each one of those wrappers. Most of them were chocolate or had a texture that he just couldn't describe. He took one with a blue wrapper.

"I wouldn't take the blue ones, they taste awful."

His body froze. His whole senses went on alert. Next to him stood a man in a red and purple looking suit adorned with a black shirt and an amount of silver chains he couldn't count in one glance. His arms were crossed and a glass of wine was in one of his hands. His hair had red streaks and his facial hair was gone. He had painted his lips faintly pink and his eyelids had a mix of red and black shadow upon them. The golden slitted eyes were indeed luminescent, everything Alec had hoped and feared to see up-close. This wasn't just any man, and the more it downed on him, the more Alec felt himself freeze, his heart almost hammering to a stop.

This was Magnus Bane.


	12. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter of the bunch, mild kink ahead.

He didn't know whether he wanted to run or stay. Whether to flee or fight. Whether to freeze or faint. The head gamemaker took a sip of his wine, expectantly looking at him, and Alec just couldn't move; it was as if everything under his feet had just crumbled into a void. His heart was racing, his whole body was tensing up. His hands became clammy with sweat and the hairs on the back of his neck were raised.

He…

"I-I- what ?" he stammered.

He couldn't breathe.

"The blue candies, they taste awful, I wouldn't recommend them."

Alec looked mystified at the half undone wrapper between his fingers. Not thinking he just put it back into the bowl. Magnus took a step forward, suddenly very close to Alec. He reached out to the bowl. The scent of sandalwood hit Alec like a stone brick to his face. Entrancing, sharp. It stung on his tongue like a needle. His sense of smell was in mere seconds completely overtaken by the spicy scent. It was even mixed with a soft cologne. He felt his eyes flutter. His head was dizzy. The warmth of having someone close to him like that was an intoxication in itself. When Magnus was done searching and took a few steps backwards, brushing Alec in the process. Deliberately or unintentionally, Alec couldn't tell, his brain was short circuiting. It felt electric, searing, blistering. He couldn't think about anything else but how Magnus had brushed his sides with his elbow.

"Try this one." Alec looked at the extended orange candy as if it was completely alien to him. He mechanically took it and put it into his mouth. He didn't register the taste and when his eyes locked themselves with the golden cat eyes he just swallowed it without thinking.

The head gamemaker looked amused, but didn't make any more comments about it. "This evening has been quite fruitful to you already, I heard."

Alec felt himself fidget, he was completely unsteady. Out of breath, out of mind. He forced himself to speak: "News travels fast."

The head gamemaker scoffed, a smirk adorned his lips. They were glossy and caught the light from time to time. "As a host and owner of this mansion, very few things escape me."

"I can imagine." Alec averted his eyes, he just couldn't. He felt really awkward. He shifted his balance on his feet. His hands were on his ring. Magnus Bane was still looking at him. The man was swirling his wine, waiting for Alec to continue the conversation. His hands had countless rings and his wrists were bare of any bracelets. Alec realised he really couldn't do this. He really couldn't talk to this man.

"I-I gotta go." He muttered. He forced himself to stay a second longer to nod toward the man and he fled.

His pace was stiff and he couldn't feel his legs as much as he wanted. He didn't know where he was going. 'Away from here' was the only thought that his mind could grasp. There were too many people around him. He exhaled, trying to keep himself from running. But he couldn't escape. He heard Lydia say his name. He hid the best he could that he was out of breath and walked over to her.

"You alright ? You look like you have seen a ghost." She laid a hand on his arm right where the head gamemaker had brushed him while taking the candy from the bowl. He shrugged her off. It burned.

"I need some fresh air. Too many people in here." She frowned; he averted his eyes. She would be able to read through him if he wasn't careful.

"There are balconies upstairs, you can catch a great view from it."

Alec looked up at the man who Lydia had been talking to. He was from Alicante. His suit contrasted with his dark almost black eyes. He was wearing a pin on the lapel of his jacket that indicated he was a gamemaker. Alec really didn't want to talk.

"Thank you," he said before fleeing just as fast. He said a 'nice to meet you' while doing so.

He found the flight of stairs quite easily since they had been at the entrance of the mansion. He briefly wondered if he was going to be stopped by the silent brothers that were visibly guarding the way up. They didn't stop him when he took a first hesitant step. They still didn't move when he took the second step. Assuming it was safe he decided to ascend without any further thought. The upstairs bloomed out into a corridor with several rooms. One room in particular seemed open for people to enter. On the opposite side there was indeed a balcony that overlooked the gardens of the mansion. Alec let his feet guide him, desperately needing the air. Once he reached the stone edge and his eyes were resting on something else than people of Alicante, he could let himself relax. There was only one buffet table here and the conversations were a lot quieter. Music was also absent so he could finally be alone with his thoughts.

He put his hands on the cold stone, still not really understanding what just had transpired. Why on earth had Magnus Bane come up to him or even talked to him ? Alec had tried to murder him. He was supposed to be a primary target. Someone that would be hated, despised by the gamemakers. Someone they would want dead. Conversation, meeting or even talking to Alec wasn't supposed to be part of the plan. But maybe, just maybe Alec had it wrong. Maybe this was a 'know your enemy' or something like 'keep your enemies closer' kind of deal. If this were the case he was done for. Dead without a chance. Talking to gamemakers wouldn't matter, them finding out more about him wouldn't matter either. He exhaled. His head felt so heavy already. He scratched the stone under his nails and exhaled again to calm himself down.

"What's with the long face, blue eyes ?"

Her voice was sharp, he almost didn't recognise her since her hair was dyed dark. But he couldn't mistake her for someone else when her tongue licked her lips. Two long white canines were clearly visible, a cosmetic alteration she had done once her games had ended. She had ripped apart many tributes, some of them she had even bled to death. Her deadly beauty had been praised and her technique not yet bested since there hadn't been any other games without weapons after hers. Camille Belcourt. Her pale skin was powdered and her dress was as red as her lips. Her jewellery looked as rich as her.

"Not much of a talker ?" Her smile filled Alec with unease and he crossed his arms. He hadn't thought of talking with other victors before now. Not that he knew all of them. But the ones he remembered were hard to forget and he hadn't noticed them being part of the other guests.

"What is it that you want ?" he didn't mean to bite. But she had caught him in a not good moment. She kept off-puttingly smiling at him.

"Just a chat, seemed appropriate since you will be dead tomorrow." She leaned against the stone edge. "However, there are more dead people at this party than actually alive ones. So it's quite fitting no matter what."

He didn't reply. He didn't like how she implied that he wasn't going to be a victor. It didn't bruise his ego nor his pride. However he couldn't ignore the chill that ran down his spine. He couldn't read Camille, he couldn't read what she had meant by saying they were surrounded by dead people. It unnerved him.

"Well, we're talking." He said dryly.

"Great," she wasn't cheerful. 'Coy' was more how he would describe her. "An 11, great score. They must be so proud at home in district 2." He internally shook his head. There was no possible way he would talk about his family with her. He kept quiet.

"Alright," she said. "What about your training session ? You shot an arrow at the evaluation team, it apparently made a lasting impression on them. How great is that ?"

He raised an eyebrow at her. "How do you know ?"

The way she looked at him made it clear how _pleased_ she was with the question. She even picked up a lock of her hair to play with it before answering: "I have my sources." She looked up at him. "It helps when you have heartbroken a certain someone numerous times, it loosens tongues and him in particular. He still talks to me." Alec squinted at her, not sure if he was understanding correctly what she was saying. "If I want him to of course."

He didn't know what to think of it. He wasn't even sure if it had been established now that she had broken Magnus Bane's heart or not.

"It was quite a good shot. But I could have hurt someone. It was reckless." He uncrossed his arms, letting his fingers caressed the rough stone of the balcony's edge. Her face turned into a scowl.

"There is not such thing as recklessness, you should have killed one. They all deserve it." He frowned, absolutely not agreeing with this fact. Gamemakers and sponsors weren't the ones that had to pay for the crimes and the uprising Valentine Morgenstern had committed. The districts, the ones who had allied themselves with him, they had to pay for it. The districts had to take responsibility for their crimes.

"It was well done-" She added before being interrupted.

"More like medium rare. Mainly because he has, in fact, not killed anyone."

Alec turned around to see Magnus Bane walking up to them. It struck Alec that the Head gamemaker was actually slightly shorter than him. Alec took a step back instinctively to give the man space into the conversation. Camille didn't look pleased and neither did their new conversational partner.

"Magnus, how lovely to see you." Her voice tried to be sultry but she didn't even pretend to hide her annoyance.

Alec looked at Magnus, wondering how the man would react. He saw the clench in the head gamemaker's jaw and decided to stay quiet. He really didn't want to involve himself in this conversation. He wondered if he could discreetly slip away again.

"I can't say the pleasure is shared, Camille." The tone was cutting. It sent a shiver down Alec's spine. The golden eyes flicked with well concealed anger. Magnus Bane looked intimidating when he was angry.

"Come now, not in front of the boy." She was dismissive and Alec realised he was completely overlooked. It pissed him off. He had really no interest in their petty feud. Or was it a lover's quarrel ?

"I'm not a boy and I'm leaving this conversation," he said, ready to indeed exit this conversation as soon as possible. Camille then put an invasive grip upon his forearm. Unless he forcefully liberated himself it prevented him from moving further. He was inclined to just shove her away, but refrained from it. People were probably watching their interaction. He felt the need to force himself to relax.

"No please Alec, stay. My ex-beloved has forgotten about his manners." Magnus didn't reply to her. Alec couldn't keep himself from rolling with his eyes. Magnus had crossed his arms and visibly didn't want the conversation to continue.

Camille sighed: "Well then, if you both want me gone, I guess I'll be on my way." She released her grip on Alec's arm. He hid how thankful he was that she had done so. She walked a few steps and planted a kiss on Magnus' cheek. With her heels she was the same height, if not taller, than him.

"Thank you for thinking about our refreshments. I'm glad me and the others can eat without any problem."

Incredulously Alec saw Magnus averting his eyes. It looked like guilt. But Alec didn't know the man so he wasn't sure. She walked away and Alec could see the man close his eyes briefly as if to take something in. Alec felt his heart twinge. What had this been about ? When Magnus opened his eyes, His expression changed into a more joyful one.

"Well that was that, I absolutely detest her." He gestured toward a silent brother who gave him a glass with a white liquid inside. He took the drink from the tray.

"Pardon me, I can imagine that this wasn't the best line of introduction I've ever given earlier. If nothing it was quite rude. This one wasn't all that tasteful either. If you permit it, perhaps we could try again." Magnus didn't await Alec's response and raised his glass to him. "Hello, I'm Magnus Bane."

"I know who you are, as much as you know who I am," said Alec. He didn't understand why the head gamemaker wanted to talk to him so badly. He had not expected to illicit this kind of response. "I fired an arrow at your head. Unless you don't remember ?"

Alec tried to keep his mouth shut when it threatened to open in surprise when Magnus started to chuckle. It made his stomach flutter. It made him wonder if he was going to be sick. "That you did, a very good shot."

"I-" said Alec, it was a strange compliment to give to the one who almost killed you. He felt the hairs on his neck rise. He was suddenly at a loss of words. He shoved his hands in his pockets to keep himself from fidgeting. He tried to lower his shoulders, tried to calm down. "What would have happened if you hadn't been there to stop it ?"

Magnus looked amused, he took a sip of his drink. "I don't think there is any answer to your question that you would like to hear." Alec felt himself become wary. Why had the head gamemaker come to talk to him ? Was it to threaten him ? "If anything, I can tell you that everything is warded here."

Magnus put down his glass on the edge of the balcony. "Come with me, I'll show it to you." Alec almost didn't catch the clue to follow the head gamemaker until said man was already a few paces in front of him. He lowered his head as if to make himself scarce. It wasn't clear if it was being noticed that Alec was following Magnus to other places. He didn't know how safe it was either. If anything this could be a trap. He didn't know how to feel about this yet. Magnus turned around the corner to get into the other corridor. The amount of people was thinning with every turn Magnus was taking, Until there was just the two of them. They were probably at the other side of the building. Huge widows were giving a view on the front gardens. Alec got distracted by the lights shimmering inside of the trees. They looked like lanterns. He stopped himself from almost colliding with the head gamemaker.

With sharp gestures that Alec had yet to see anyone do, Magnus opened a sliding door. Since it was mostly hidden Alec wouldn't have seen it if it hadn't been for the head gamemaker. The door slid open soundlessly to a flight of stairs. Magnus made his way up and Alec followed. He hadn't heard of detention centres having been created upstairs these days, unless it was a torture chamber.

It was a huge library. Rows and rows of books and other curiosities were displayed on the left and on the right of him. Reassured it wasn't a torture chamber, he made his way inside. Magnus took long strides until he arrived to the biggest widow there was. With another sign of hands the window opened. There was a cold breeze. Magnus then climbed out to the elevated thin platform outside. Alec didn't immediately follow. He was riddled with questions. Magnus turned around and crouched.

Alec's heart stopped as he just couldn't help but stare at the extended hand. It was bejewelled. The hand bracelet he hadn't seen before was golden and contrasted with the head gamemaker's skin. The nails were painted black and two fingers had a huge signet rings saying 'M' and 'B' in a lettering that wasn't all that easy to read. He looked up at Magnus, still trying to understand how and what he was trying to accomplish. Shivers went all over his spine, his palms got sweaty, he was aware of his blush all of a sudden. He felt like he couldn't do it, but rejecting it would make it more awkward. He felt like this whole thing was more intimate than what he would want. It was too close. Too soon. Too direct.

Magnus was still awaiting his response. Dread and fear were striking Alec's heart and he knew he had to calm it down at all cost, lest he start to tremble. He inhaled. His limbs felt incredibly heavy when he finally laid his hand inside the offered one. He looked away, feeling the electric pulsing of their touch soar its way into the pit of his stomach. Magnus grabbed his forearm. It was so warm, so incredibly warm. His whole body reacted to that mere touch. Goosebumps were appearing all over him. He felt himself sweat some more. He tried to exhale to keep down panic and fear. He was going to break down otherwise.

He pushed himself up with the help of the head gamemaker. He didn't accept more help to be hauled up. Once he stabilised himself upon his feet, he dusted off his clothes. He could have climbed up there without Magnus. He was an idiot. He refused to look at the head gamemaker. His reactions toward the man had embarrassed him enough.

"Usually only maintenance comes up here," said Magnus. Alec was silently thankful for the way Magnus just went on about what he had planned. Alec followed the pointed finger. There was a great view from here.

"There are several control panels everywhere, you just need to know where to find them." Alec looked in wonder at how Magnus made a holographic panel appear out of thin air. It was transparent as if it was made of glass if it weren't for the occasional coloured flickering buttons. Magnus typed things in really fast. And the panel disappeared again. The head gamemaker looked at him with a wide grin. Alec frowned. But it didn't take long before Alec understood why Magnus was smiling.

Little by little as if they had always been there, small particles of light were appearing all around them. It reminded Alec of what had been described to him as fireflies. But these weren't insects, they made no sound. They were floating everywhere but mostly around Magnus' hands. It was beautiful. "These are nanites." As he lifted his hand, moved his fingers, the nanites followed and spun around. They changed colours occasionally.

Magnus made a sharp gesture and signed a command. The nanites stopped in their tracks, froze and then vibrated in rhythm. They all bundled up together and all of a sudden there was a glass of wine in Magnus' hand. Alec was stunned. He couldn't believe what he just saw. He definitely didn't understand. Magnus looked smug and extended the glass to him. Alec accepted it solely because he was still bewildered. It felt real, heavy. It was a real glass and the smell of the wine was pretty much real as well. He didn't drink. Magnus spun around to face the empty air and made even bigger signs.

Alec almost dropped his glass when a wall of nanites appeared. They looked like they were closely knit together like a luminescent blanket. "May I ?" Magnus was gesturing toward Alec's glass. When the tribute offered it to him he, without restraint, threw it toward the floating patch of nanites. The particles enveloped the glass and the liquid that had spilled over, keeping it all suspended in the air. Alec, who originally tensed up at the gesture, relaxed when he didn't hear the crash of glass. Magnus then made the control panel appear again. With a few clicks the nanites became translucent and went invisible.

"This is how I stopped your arrow." Magnus crossed his arms, still looking very smug. Alec took a few steps forward. He extended his arm and hand toward where he knew the blanket of nanites was. He didn't feel any resistance and grabbed the glass without a problem. When Magnus snapped his fingers another glass appeared and suddenly he was very close to Alec.

With a low voice he tilted the glass toward Alec, clinking their glasses. Alec had stiffened the very moment the head gamemaker had moved in toward him. The golden yellow eyes locked with his. Alec felt his cheeks turning hot. They were incredibly close. More than before. More than what Alec felt he could take. He felt his eyes trace the details of the head gamemaker's face. The high cheekbones, powdered hooded eyelids, the gloss on the lips. He felt a surge of want; A desire to lean down; A thirst that left his mouth dry and starving. He disengaged.

"Thank you for showing me all of this," he awkwardly gestured toward the empty air, already feeling more cumbersome and tall. He felt nervous. "I had never seen anything like this before."

The smile Magnus shot at him was blinding. "I'm delighted you liked it." Alec hid himself behind his glass of wine and drank it. Magnus seemed to be stuck in some quiet contemplation. It was as if the man was hesitating. Alec wasn't sure if he was still comfortable being in the same spot as the head gamemaker. He didn't understand exactly why he was here. A tension he couldn't put his finger on was floating between them as well. Why was he on a rooftop kind of platform, looking at how technology in Alicante worked ? And why was the head gamemaker quietly staring at him. He drained his glass in one go. He felt its effects almost immediately as it hit his tongue and throat. How, when it made its way into his stomach, it relaxed his muscles.

"Let's go back inside," Magnus suggested. Alec nodded, following the head gamemaker. He didn't offer Alec his hand this time.

The lights of the library were dim, they had automatically sprung on when they had entered. It happened again once they were inside. Alec still marvelled at being in such a big room, but now that his eyes weren't focused on the head gamemaker he let his eyes wander on the rows of books. Were they made of paper ? He approached a bookcase with very colourful books. The lettering on their backs were good craftsmanship as well. He reached out to touch them. He noticed they were indeed paper books.

"Fairytales are interesting subjects to work with when it's about the games, my mother used to sing some lullabies or tell me stories before I fell asleep…" Alec didn't look up at Magnus until he registered the sadness in the other man's voice. "…when I was younger." Magnus finished.

The head gamemaker made his way to Alec. The cat eyes were glowing more when there wasn't much light around them. Could Magnus Bane see in the dark ? He watched as the head gamemaker was playing with his earcuff. Something was bothering him. Alec frowned. Was he embarrassed to have shared something personal ?

"Tell me Alexander, do you read ?" The question made Alec look at his hand on the book.

"I don't get much time, we don't have a lot of books in district 2." The library at the institute was mostly digital. And Alec had preferred to train than to read. But when he wanted to be alone and it was his time off ? Yeah those were the moments he took the opportunity to read.

"Ah yes- yes of course," Magnus stopped fidgeting with his ear jewellery as if suddenly he realised he was doing it. He was about to say something else but Alec interrupted him.

"Sir," The scowl that formed on the head gamemaker's face made Alec stop in his track and close his mouth.

"Don't call me sir, you make me feel terribly old," Magnus seemed to be half-serious and half-hurt as he was dramatically holding his chest where his heart was supposed to be. Or he was just pretending to be. There was a laugh crossing his lips and he shook his head.

And yet again Alec couldn't breathe.

"I-Okay," he said while pinching the inside of his arm. Just so he remembered not to get lost in contemplation. Magnus was only a few meters away from him. He balled his fists, letting his nails dig into his skin. He summoned courage, he had thought of fleeing only a few seconds ago. Magnus Bane was just one man. Not an army. He would be able to keep his cool if he so desired it. "I don't understand you," he continued. "Why are you showing me all of this ?"

"Well since you're the first tribute ever that has actively shot an arrow at me I thought it would be interesting to get to know you." Magnus leaned against the bookcase next to him. Alec didn't know what to expect as a response. He wouldn't have deemed himself interesting to anyone. Especially not for insubordination. It didn't add up. It wasn't logical. He briefly wondered if it hadn't been better if he had been plainly punished. At least he would have understood the situation better.

"Why ?" He kept himself from crossing his arms defensively. He wanted to look self-assured.

"Because I want to." The smile and gestures, it was as if it was self-explanatory. Except it wasn't. There was more to it. Alec could feel it in his gut. There was something about Magnus Bane and he couldn't put his finger unto it.

"I propose we make our way downstairs again." Magnus spun around and gestured Alec to follow him. Alec did as he was told. He glanced at the empty glasses on the window platform. People would probably clean it up later. Once downstairs Magnus slid the door shut again. His gestures were slower and Alec was mesmerised by the way Magnus' signed the commands.

He had his own style, Alec noticed. Catarina had more flowing gestures. Ragnor's were short and sharp. Magnus' fingers always seemed to dance. They told a story just by themselves. With a satisfying smile Magnus turned toward Alec. The light in the corridor was different, it made the red in the head gamemaker's hair reflect differently. It made Alec want to get closer; maybe even touch. Maybe even let a hair lock intertwine with his fingers. He wanted to touch Magnus's face; touch the skin, caress the jawline; to feel and explore. He wanted to get closer, study the face in front of him. Let his fingers trail over the curve of cheeks and the softness of skin. But he didn't. There wasn't one single situation where he would allow himself do such things.

"So are you more a cologne or a flower kind of man ?" Alec blinked.

"Excuse me ?" Did he hear that right ?

"Are you a cologne or more a flower kind of man ?" Magnus asked again.

Alec couldn't keep his eyebrows from raising themselves; suddenly very aware of his heart hammering in his chest.

"I-I" He averted his eyes. He shifted from one foot to the other. He didn't want to reply. He inhaled. It was a pale attempt at stabilising himself. He felt like the ground could swallow him up at any moment. He shot up a defensive strategy, somewhere knowing he was treading in dangerous waters. "Isn't it pretty inappropriate to ask ?" He managed to say without hiccups. But still… his voice had wavered.

Magnus cocked his head to the side. A soft smile appeared on his lips and Alec felt like there wasn't really a way back from here. He had replied to the question, even if he hadn't actually voiced it. "Oh, my apologies, I just needed to make sure that the reason you were looking at me the way you do was because you wanted to kiss me. And not because there was something else I wasn't picking up on."

Alec felt like he just had been dunked into icy cold water. The sweatiness of his palms felt uncomfortable. He felt frozen on the spot, not certain whether to fight or flee, not certain whether to say yes or no. Whether to deny everything or to reply. He felt exposed, compromised, caught red-handed. He tensed up his jaw. He needed to think with his head. Keep calm. Rule out anything that was throwing him off, clear thinking. A clear mind meant a clear heart. And yet…

"There is nothing to be ashamed of Alec," Magnus continued. The head gamemaker had read him so deeply and so correctly. It was embarrassing; a shameful ordeal, really. How did it get to this ? How could he, Alexander Lightwood, put himself in such jeopardy ? How had he failed that badly ?

"You're certainly not the first, and certainly not the last one on wanting to do it." The smile turned into a smirk. And Magnus left it at that. As if it was an established rule. As if it was an irrevocable truth. Alec didn't want that. He didn't want this to be the last thing to be said about it. He still wanted to save himself from the shame; the torment; the feeling of completely having lost control.

"It's– I– You-" he tried and stammered. "It's confusing, you're confusing." It was a low blow, it was a desperate attempt at protection. He didn't want to it to be real. He didn't want it to be factual.

"Am I ?" Magnus asked. It almost threw Alec off again. He was falling; Falling apart; Falling deeper with every reply and defence he was putting on.

"You…" His face felt so hot. His heart was tearing itself away in his chest. Panic had completely clouded his mind. He couldn't find a way out. "You expect me to do what exactly ? I come here, you ignore me, us, we. We do our best to show skill and perseverance but unless we attack you, you don't even glance at us. Then suddenly you invite us all to a party with food we haven't tasted before. You show us magic tricks, do conversation as if our, my, very life isn't in your hands at every single second we will be in the arena tomorrow. You talk about yourself, party, laugh. You don't think. You do whatever you please. What is it you want ?"

"I don't expect anything of you Alec. You are a free man." The way the lips pursed upon each other. Magnus seemed unfazed toward Alec's inner battle and Alec knew he had lost. He wanted to weep. He wanted to hide.

"I'm not free, I've never been free." Not from his family, not from his duties. Not from the games. They were all trapped. Puppets in a game greater than their mere comprehension. He was nothing, not a victor, nor a man, just a pawn. The restrictions, the oppression. It didn't mean anything. His whole life had been a lie. The proof of it was right there outside of this mansion. Under the form a fountain. Being here with Magnus Bane; fearing for his life; was just another.

"What do you want from me ?" He asked, his voice was detached, aloof. He had lost this battle. He could only resign.

"At this very moment ? Nothing." It made Alec's throat constrict. As if he could never talk again.

"But what do _you_ want from me, Alec ?" Magnus' voice was low and soft. It rumbled in his chest. It made Alec shiver. "When you shot that arrow, what was it that you were trying to say ?"

"I don't know," was the only thing Alec was able to whisper until anything else died in his mouth.

"I think you know exactly what you were trying to say." The sentence made Alec squeeze his eyes shut. The unrest in his heart, his head, it was all raging inside of him. When he looked back at Magnus again he felt his heart crush upon itself. He didn't want to look and yet he couldn't turn his gaze away. Not from the lips, not from the eyes, not from the Adam's apple bobbing up and down.

_Set me free_

"I can't give you what you want. It is not how I work. It's not how any head gamemaker works. But I can give you something else and you know you want it as much if not more than I do." Magnus didn't move but Alec could feel he wanted to. Or maybe he was just projecting his own desires on the man.

"Do you want me to make the first step ?" Alec's nerves frayed. He was inevitably drawn in by Magnus' eyes. He wanted to say no. He desperately wanted to say yes. He felt his resolve break. With every question asked. With every reply he wasn't giving. He wanted to kiss; touch; smell; caress. He wanted to lose himself. And for this he had to lose his mind. "Is that what you're into ? Someone taking the lead ?"

"I-I don't know." He wanted it all.

"Tell me to stop Alec, and I'll stop. I have no interest in bedding the unwilling."

Alec didn't reply. He didn't say yes and didn't say no. He didn't say stop when Magnus took a step forward. He didn't reject or avoid it when the jewelled hands traced the lapels of his jacket. He didn't waver. He didn't back off. When the smell of sandalwood hit his nostrils he didn't falter. He trembled, shivered, panicked. But he didn't move.

He closed his eyes as he dipped down. Still unsure, still hesitant. His breath mingled itself with another, finally experiencing something he never thought he ever would. A little nudge on the lapels is all it would take.

"Kiss me Alexander."

Magnus' voice was low. It came from deep within. It shook Alec to his core. His stomach bloomed with desire. The warm hands on his jacket were making his brain melt. He was so tense. He couldn't take it. Magnus' eyes were on him while the only thing Alec could look at were the lips right in front of him. There was nothing else in the world but this simple request. He trembled as his hands laid themselves on Magnus' forearms and wrists. The strength; the closeness; and just like this he was lost forever. Despite his doubts, despite his feelings of confusion he leaned in.

The kiss was soft, wet, warm. It was white noise in his ears. It was his heart quivering away. It was his knees almost buckling. It was closing his eyes and letting himself be guided. It was wonderful, liberating. His mind reset to zero, the very existence of time vanished with every movement of their lips. It was releasing and destructive at the same time. He couldn't stop himself. He couldn't stop himself from liking it. He couldn't stop himself from giving in. He couldn't stop himself from opening up.

Magnus traced the line of his lips with his tongue. He couldn't stop himself from agreeing, consenting. Alec reinforced his grip on the head gamemaker's arms as the tongue invaded his mouth. It made him moan, lose his footing. His cheeks flushed. His heart raced. His hands didn't have enough. They had to touch, touch more of the man kissing him. He let his hands caress the fabric of Magnus' jacket. They wormed their way toward the head gamemaker's waist. The muscles, the feeling of holding someone close, it made him moan even more. The foreign sound breached his lips. He broke the kiss, unable to physically breathe any longer.

He looked at Magnus' eyes which looked at him from underneath his eyelashes. Alec's breathing was ragged; on edge. It took him mere seconds before going back to it again and again. Magnus' lips were eager, demanding. It awakened in Alec a hunger he didn't know he possessed. Before he knew it he was pushing the head gamemaker against the wall, pressing their bodies together by slipping a leg in between Magnus's, just to be closer. He felt the jewelled fingers roam through in his hair, holding him steadily at the nape of his neck. He sighed again and again.

He knew that the hard line he was feeling against his hip was a sign of arousal. He knew of himself that he was just as hard. The more they kissed the more he was a goner. His body was on fire like there was no tomorrow. Because there might as well be no tomorrow for him. He had died right at the moment he had shot that arrow during his private showing.

Magnus grinded himself against him, a sigh escaped his lips. Alec wanted to touch but didn't know how to ask. He rested his forehead against the other man's, trying to catch back his lost oxygen. He almost didn't dare to open his eyes again. Alec didn't react when he saw the cat eyes vanishing, seeing Magnus' real eye colour for the first time. They were just as beautiful. Alec leaned back down and Magnus disengaged himself from Alec's hold. He was about to speak until he understood what Magnus' plan was. In a sharp sign and another command gesture a door opened.

Scared, but anticipating, Alec just grabbed the man by the jacket or he was the one being grabbed, he didn't recall. One light flickered on with another snap of fingers when they entered the room.

Magnus' lips were on him again, hungrier than before. Alec couldn't follow. Hands were tugging on every piece of clothing on his chest. He shrugged off his jacket and pressed Magnus against a wall. The hands made their way under his T-shirt and touched his chest. Fingernails dug themselves into the flesh of his back. It made Alec whimper as they dragged into a scratching caress. It felt like he was burning up even more. Magnus repeated it and Alec just grinded himself against him, inhaling air through his teeth. Alec's hand rested against Magnus' chest as he let Magnus wreck him. His tongue lapped at the other. He moaned again and again. He was going to pass out. His hands trembled when they made their way downward. He was hesitant but determined when he palmed the other man's erection. Magnus groaned in his mouth, bucking his hips. Alec felt his arousal spike. How was it possible for this to be this exhilarating ? To be so carnal ? He reached for Magnus' belt.

A firm hand was on Alec's wrist in mere seconds. Magnus' eyes were still closed and Alec could tell he was assessing what the tribute was doing. Fingers played with his hair. Alec used both hands to unbuckle the belt. Magnus' breathing was minimal as if he was keeping it in. Alec undid the button, lowered the zipper.

Alec didn't bother trying to avoid what he wanted. He reached for the man's erection, tugging at the waistband of Magnus' underwear to go under it. The hot shaft felt smooth and hard. The hand at the back of his head tugged at his hair locks and he let out a moan at the same time Magnus sighed. Fuck. He didn't have a lot of room to move but he twisted his hand the best he could to grab the erection. Magnus' hips stuttered. Another moan breached his lips. Alec tried to move his hand the best he could. But he soon understood that he had to do something else if he wanted to have more of this.

Magnus opened his eyes again. The cat eyes were staring back at Alec's face. He saw the man's mouth part open, his eyebrows rising, as Alec went on his knees.

Of course he didn't know what he was doing. Of course he didn't know if it was a good idea. But it was what he wanted, right here and right now. His hands grabbed Magnus' underwear. There was something even more arousing at the way the erection just sprung free. He had seen plenty of men naked in the showers at the institute. But this was different. So damn different. Now he could really take a look, touch, feel. The smell of it was amazing. Alec couldn't help but lick his lips. He let his hands wander over the still clothed thighs. The muscles were hard and tense. It reminded Alec of how fucking hard he was himself. He leaned his head forward and heard Magnus gasp as he nuzzled his nose against the patch of hair next to the warm shaft. The hand on his shoulder squeezed him. A grunt passed Magnus' lips.

He laid kisses there softly, gently, not sure if this was the right way to do it. He gently took hold of Magnus' balls, letting them roll in his hands. The skin felt just as soft. He kissed them and Magnus inhaled sharply. Encouraged, Alec continued. He felt the goosebumps forming at the back of his neck as he dared to dart his tongue past his lips.

Magnus grunted. He laid a hand on Alec's head. The fingers were digging deep into the hairs of his scalp. The mere gesture made Alec moan. He needed more. Wanted more. He let his tongue roam and he decided to take the erection in his hand at the root. The smell of him was out of this world.

The first lick was experimental. He wasn't sure how it would taste. He wasn't sure if it was going to be something he enjoyed. But he did. The grasp on his hairs tightened. He flattened his tongue to lick the underside of Magnus' cock. The audible sigh from the head gamemaker's lips was lustful and incredibly arousing. He shifted himself on his knees to be more balanced. The steady hand on his scalp reassured him in ways he wouldn't have guessed it could. He slid back the foreskin and Magnus groaned when Alec put his lips around the head. There was even the slightest thrust of hips. He let his tongue explore, let his lips move. It was so good. The sharp carnal taste of it. Magnus seemed the most responsive when he licked slightly more on the right underside of his cock. So he concentrated on that side. The fingers in his hair were starting to twist themselves around his locks more and more.

"Are you going take it deeper Alexander ?" Magnus' voice was unstable, gruff and low. Alec only replied with a moan. He was completely up for it. Whatever it meant. He wanted it, anticipated it, looked forward to it.

Magnus' other hand joined his on the shaft to lock his hand in place. It squeezed Alec's fingers, reinforced his grip on the cock. "Relax your mouth." Magnus murmured.

The weight in his mouth was intoxicating as the shaft just slid inside of it. Alec felt himself just getting dizzier. Magnus was holding his head steadily and it felt amazing. The gasp he exhaled just made Alec hungrier, starving. He wanted to hear that again. He felt his own arousal trapped in his trousers. It was straining. He let his lips slide back up. He wasn't sure how to use his tongue but he made sure that he did again what he just had been shown. He felt the cock twitch in his mouth. He tried to pick up a pace, to slide down and back up. Magnus' thrust of hips met his lips almost every time. The hand on the shaft prevented Alec from going too deep. Sometimes the head gamemaker tugged at his hair. It made Alec groan. Every time he did, Magnus' thrust was slightly harder or deeper.

"You like that ?" The grip on his hairs reinforced itself and Alec felt like he was seeing stars; it prickled him. He rocked his hips slightly, trying to find some friction, any friction. He whimpered more loudly than ever. His lips were straining, swollen. He had a hard time breathing but he didn't want to stop. "You like it."

Magnus' voice was like hot liquid poured over him. It made him shiver. "Do you want me to hurt you more ?" Magnus slid out of his mouth. Alec's breathing was ragged. He was so out of breath. He nuzzled the patch of hair again. The shaft was so wet against his cheeks. "Alexander, I'd like an answer."

He closed his eyes, inhaling the smell. The sweat intermixed with sandalwood, the warmth of Magnus' cock: It was wonderful. He nodded, slightly. He had liked the feeling of his hair being tugged hard. He had liked the nails digging into his back.

Magnus shifted his stance against the wall. The pressure of the shoe against his trapped erection made Alec almost sob in relief. He unconsciously thrusted against it, especially when Magnus traced it. He hadn't expect it to be so good. He laid his forehead against Magnus' pelvis. He wanted more of that friction, more of that movement against him. He wanted his erection to be free. He placed his hands against Magnus' thighs as if to ground himself. The heel pressed harder, it hurt and he whimpered. But he rocked his hips regardless. It felt incredibly good. Magnus tugged his hair.

Alec looked up and their eyes locked. A flush was spread across the head gamemaker's cheeks. Alec felt proud. This was his doing. Magnus guided his cock back into Alec's mouth. It felt so hard and wet. Alec moaned around it. He would remember this. Forever. Magnus' thrust of hips was more careful this time; it was mostly Alec sliding his lips or teasing the head, which made Magnus back his head against the wall. The sounds Magnus was providing were exquisite. Alec moved against Magnus' shoe which upper side was now moving against his testicles. He moaned again when Magnus pressed the heel between them. Yes it hurt. But it felt good. So unbelievably good. He laid a hand around Magnus' ankle, indicating he could press even harder. Magnus did and Alec felt it to the point of breaking.

He let the erection in his mouth slide out of his mouth. His jaw ached and the strain on his lips was burning. He needed a break to breathe. His knees were starting to feel really numb. Magnus' took himself in hand and Alec was captivated by the movement. The sliding of the foreskin over the glans was divine to look at. Magnus' moans were the only thing echoing in his ears. The pace was faster than what he had been able to accomplish with his mouth. It was so erotic, seeing such a beautiful man so undone.

"Do you want me to finish in your mouth ?" The question was ragged, rough, needy. Alec opened his mouth, let his tongue lol out of it and looked up. The grunt Magnus let out made Alec's cock twitch. The grip on his hair was visceral. He winced but Magnus didn't let go. The movement of masturbation was faster and Magnus stood on his two feet to keep himself balanced. He pushed Alec down on his cock. He kept his fingers right under the head. Alec wasn't sure if he heard swearing. Alec licked the slit eagerly and Magnus' hips jerked up to him.

He wasn't prepared for the flood of semen hitting his palate. He steadied himself getting his cheeks to catch what he could. He swallowed what he could; the taste was sharp and intense. It almost felt endless and it tasted so differently than him.

Magnus' grip relaxed and he sagged a bit against the wall. Alec still licked at the gradually softening shaft. Magnus twitched every single time he did it. He nuzzled Magnus' underbelly one more time, taking in the scent before standing up. His legs cried in relief. He kissed Magnus eagerly. His hands grabbed at the buttons of the black shirt. He wanted to feel more of Magnus. He wanted his hands on him. He wanted his own release. Magnus' kiss was slower but followed Alec's pace. Their tongues caressed each other, touched each other, licked at each other. It felt just as good.

He took the lapels of Magnus' jacket and guided the man toward the bed he had noticed when they had entered. Magnus helped him to take off his T-shirt. Alec had only one goal in mind. He wanted to touch more of the head gamemaker's skin. Magnus took off his shirt and jacket while Alec unbuckled his belt and shoved his pants down to then undo his shoes. Magnus just had time to do the same until Alec pushed him on the bed to straddle him.

The touch of skin to skin was warm and flushing. Alec groaned as he rubbed his crotch against Magnus' thigh. He had never been so aroused in his life and everything felt more sensitive. He kissed Magnus' jawline and neck. Nails dug into Alec's back again. Alec's breathing felt so shredded and he moaned as Magnus scratched him slowly, torturously. The brown eyes, which had been back for a while, looked at Alec so clouded and dilated; the tribute captured their lips together. Just the hint of tongue was given. Alec linked their foreheads. The feeling of having a man underneath him was everything he would ever live for at this moment. He guided Magnus' hand on him. Alec closed his eyes.

He wasn't going to last long. He felt it. Being touched like this for the first time ever ? It was murderous. Magnus' grip was steady and Alec helped him to find the right rhythm. He almost cried in relief. He chased the movement of their hands. He was desperate. His orgasm had built itself up so intensely he wondered if he would even reach it. But Magnus seemed to know what he was doing. He even stopped to spit in his hand. Alec almost grunted in discontent until he felt what the extra slick was doing to him. He went faster, squeezing where he liked it. Magnus let his hand then wander toward his balls and Alec felt like he was losing it. It was so warm and sensitive. Fuck. Magnus caressed the nape of his neck and breathed just as irregularly. He was even moaning.

The sound was driving Alec mad. He felt himself tighten. He just used his forefinger and thumb. His muscles were so tense. He thrusted his hips so erratically he knew he was going to come. And when he did, wordlessly, his whole body shook. His whole being crashed. He let himself ejaculate all over the man underneath him.

He swallowed, his voice and throat were sore. He was gasping for air as if he hadn't breathed this whole time. He couldn't take his own weight anymore and let himself rest limply on top of the other man. He wondered if he had passed out because of the few seconds, or were they minutes ?, it took him to be aware of his surroundings again. He stirred against Magnus.

The head gamemaker then made a display of dexterity and strength that Alec hadn't anticipated; He flipped them over. Alec looked inquisitively but right when he was about to talk Magnus locked their lips together. It was sensuous. Slow. It was so tender Alec felt himself melt. He lost sense of time again. The warmth of their bodies brought him so much comfort and peace. He breathed the best he could through his nose; he caressed the nape of Magnus' neck; he felt so satisfied and content. It was everything he had ever wished for.

When Magnus put an end to their kiss Alec didn't even feel disappointed. "I'm going to get something to freshen us up."

Alec nodded and Magnus got up. They were still sticky. Yeah. They really needed to freshen up. Alec sighed, feeling more relaxed than he had ever felt. He looked up at the mirror on the four poster bed's ceiling. His stare looked back at him and he almost didn't recognise himself. His hair was a mess and his naked body wasn't something he was used to looking at. The man that was staring back at him was a stranger. Alec was just a lone figure in this giant bed. He wasn't sure if he liked the imagery of it. Besides, what amount of vanity did Magnus Bane possess to have a mirror on the ceiling of his bed ? Probably a great amount. He let his hands wander on the golden sheets. They felt like cool water. He closed his eyes. The softness felt strange against his callused hands. He grasped at the silk. It felt pleasant. He started to drift off little by little but he didn't allow himself. He could lose himself in this and Magnus could come back at any given time.

His eyes sprung back open when suddenly he felt a dip on the bed. It was moving but it didn't feel like a human body. Alec sat up. The cat stared back at him, all of a sudden very skittish. Its smooth hairs were short and healthy. The complete opposite of Church, the institute's cat back in district 2. It looked like the animal was scared of him. Alec extended his hand. But the cat didn't approach it.

"I see you have met Chairman Meow," said Magnus. Alec looked back up at Magnus. He had slipped on a blue robe and was holding pieces of cloth in his hand. His hair was dishevelled. It looked nowhere near as graceful as it had been in the beginning of the evening. His yellow slitted eyes were back.

"It's better if you let him come to you, he doesn't like eye contact much. Especially with strangers." He pointed his chin toward the cat. Alec retracted his hand. Magnus made his way to the bed. The cloth was wet. Alec proceeded to clean himself up. He blushed as he realised that Magnus had no intention of looking away. He gave back the towels and the head gamemaker proceeded to just throw them around somewhere in the room.

There was something strange between them. Even when Magnus sat down next to him to kiss him. Something fluttered in Alec's stomach. He tensed up a little the more the kiss lingered; the more Magnus' hand crept up to his jaw and caressed his cheek with his thumb. The gesture was too soft, too domestic. Something that wasn't yet was supposed to have its place. Alec broke the kiss when he then suddenly felt the cat approaching. "I think he likes you," said Magnus.

There was a head-butt against his elbow and Alec caressed the fur of the animal. It definitely felt different than Church. "I've got to get back."

Magnus' face was unreadable. There was no reaction. Alec wondered what was crossing through the head gamemaker's mind. Whatever the man was thinking, he snapped out of it when Alec stirred to get up. "Ah yes, yes of course."

Alec wasn't sure what he heard in the head gamemaker's voice. It almost sounded like regret or disappointment. Alec mechanically tried to find back his clothes. He didn't know what else to say. He wanted to get out of here. He dressed rather quickly. Military training of surprise morning drills had after all been his morning routines for most of his life. He put on his jacket last. He made his way to where the door was supposed to be.

"Wait !" Magnus got up from the bed. Alec felt himself tense up. He didn't want to talk any more than necessary. Magnus stood next to him at a respectable distance; Alec did brace himself however when he felt the hand of the head gamemaker on the lapel of his jacket, rearranging it. He wasn't scared or repulsed. He just felt incredibly awkward. He wasn't supposed to be here. Alec looked anywhere but at the other man's face. He noticed the many necklaces around Magnus' collarbone and blushed at the memory on how they had scraped against his skin when he was thrusting up Magnus' hand.

"There you go," the fingers lingered just a second too long. "I'll open the door for you." Magnus turned himself toward the panel of the door. It slid open and Alec couldn't wait to get out of here. He muttered a 'good night' or 'evening' and exited Magnus' bedroom.

"Likewise." Magnus' voice was more cheery this time and the door slid back shut behind Alec.

Just like that he was now all alone in the corridor. Alec couldn't look up or anywhere. He wasn't sure if everything that had transpired had even been real. The touches, the caresses, the kissing. He felt exhausted, sore in his knees. He had to keep his mind cool. Even if strains of anxiety were threatening to emerge. Walking felt good. One step after the other. This was something he knew how to do. Even if his legs felt weak. He didn't feel shame per se but he did feel like he had just transgressed an unwritten rule. He took his first turn around the corner.

He wouldn't have guessed his evening ending like this. What time was it even ? He stopped in his tracks. His body ached, his heart was heavy. But there was something. Something that made his shoulders relax and the weight of the world felt a bit lighter at this realisation. He didn't regret it. Not one bit. Even if he blushed. Even if he didn't feel comfortable. Even if he hadn't fully grasped what had happened. Touching, licking, holding, having _sex_ ? It had felt good. A smile appeared on his lips. No, he didn't regret this one bit.

Caught in his reverie he didn't see the hand coming. Suddenly he was torn away from memories by a hand on his shirt. He looked quizzically at Hodge who looked at him with anger.

"Where have you been ?" Alec could hear how much his mentor was trying to keep his voice down.

"Around." A flush crept up his neck. He averted his eyes toward the window sills that gave an outside view of the garden. "Talking with some sponsors," he lied.

"Don't play this shit with me Alec." Alec pressed his lips together. Any feeling of comfort fleeted away as he locked eyes with his mentor. Hodge looked furious and even disgusted. "You reek of him." Hodge sniffed to illustrate his point and let go of Alec's jacket.

"I-" Alec let the sentence die in his mouth. Now he felt shame. Irrevocable and deep shame to have been caught red-handed. He felt his fingers tremble he hid them behind his back. He didn't want to let this get the better of him. He was ready to take responsibilities for his mistakes.

"There is no 'I', get to the fucking car and leave. Shower, go straight to bed, and don't talk to _anyone._ You hear me. Not Lydia, not Catarina and certainly not Ragnor if he were to choose to come back to the training centre tonight." Hodge pinched the bridge of his nose as if he was having a headache.

"Is everybody already home ?" He asked. The way Hodge was glaring at him was enough of a reply. "I've been delaying the search for you the best I could." The sound of Hodge's AR resonated. Hodge picked up. The holographic face of a peacekeeper displayed itself with a blue luminescent light.

"I trust you have found Mr. Lightwood, Mr. Starkweather ?" Hodge smiled sluggishly.

"Yes I have ma'am, the boy got lost," Alec noticed that Hodge tried to look as relaxed as he could. It could have fooled him if he hadn't known his mentor since he was eleven years old. "I have always said that we should put trackers inside of them when they enter Alicante for the first time. It would really make our jobs easier." Alec pursed his lips; he understood what kind of predicament he had put Hodge in so he kept his mouth shut.

"Your suggestion has been noted, Mr. Starkweather. I'm sending a unit to escort your tribute out of here." Hodge nodded and the peacekeeper signed out.

"I'm sorry," said Alec. He didn't like to be a bother and this was really not good for the both of them. Hodge sighed, suddenly looking really tired. "Just go home, Alec and do as I said to do: Try to be as invisible as possible."

Alec nodded. They waited for the peacekeeper unit in silence. When his escort came Alec bowed his head and made his way outside. He couldn't guess what time it was, except that he had almost exceeded curfew. When the door of the driverless car closed he felt his heart clench. His foolish decisions may as well as cost him his life. So when he got escorted back to his floor in the training centre he did just as he was told. He showered and got to bed. Everybody seemed asleep already.

When he slid in between his bedsheets he couldn't help but compare how much rougher they felt than what had laid on Magnus' bed. He touched his lips, remembering how the movements of lips came to be against his own. He still didn't regret it. He still felt like there was something he wasn't quite catching or understanding. He did understand however how relaxed and confident he felt. He felt like the happiest he had ever been in his life. With those thoughts he slowly let himself drift off to sleep. The thoughts of cat eyes and caresses rocked him to oblivion while he couldn't keep a smile off his face.

Tomorrow was the day, tomorrow he would finally start bringing glory back to his family again.


	13. Chapter 9 Day 1 Part I

He woke up before the sunlight came breaking through the window. The knocking on his door was almost too silent for him to register it. When it opened Alec sat upright. Ragnor looked tired, it was as if he hadn't slept yet. With a nod the stylist closed the door again. Alec knew he had to get dressed and be down as fast as possible. He grabbed one of the T-shirts he had put at the ready before going to sleep. He hadn't bothered trying to find another pair of trousers yesterday.

He made his way down. He didn't hear anyone being awake yet. Maybe Lydia had already left. Ragnor silently let Alec follow him outside. An escort of peacekeepers were waiting right outside their floor; instead of going down they went up. The hovercraft landing pad was at the top of the training centre. Since every tribute was to be escorted with their stylist in an individual hovercraft, the engine was smaller than what Alec had been briefed upon back in 2.

He followed the instructions given by one of the peacekeepers. When they got aboard and sat down, all of their seatbelts were checked and locked. The sound of the hovercraft was surprisingly quite muffled. Clearance was given over the radio comms. Alec felt his stomach doing somersaults as they took off. It was uncomfortable but he didn't feel terrified. This was the first time he was flying, pity there were no windows to look outside. It would probably have been quite the view. He concentrated himself on keeping his focus. The vibrations and the uneasiness in his stomach threatened the balance he had so carefully been trained to maintain.

Another peacekeeper in a medical uniform approached him and strapped him to the chair. Alec turned his head sideways to let the medic do his job. A big needle was inserted and Alec gritted his teeth by its painful intrusion. A small incision was made at the base of his neck. His whole body tensed up at it because there was something clearly wrong, the whole area was numb. But his body seemed to know there were things being exposed to the air that shouldn't be exposed. The tracker was placed deep within his flesh. The sizzling sound of the 'wound closer' pen made Alec's ears ring. But just like that it was done. He didn't feel any further pain or discomfort. It was an effective procedure. Trackers were put into the muscles of your neck since a few years ago. When it had all started they had always been planted into your arm but there were always risks of losing it due to possible amputation. This is why the neck was chosen. Without your head or neck, you were definitely dead.

The medic disappeared without any more words. Alec looked around the hovercraft. It was Spartan and without much to see really. He looked back at his stylist. Ragnor's gaze was a bit lost in nothingness. Alec liked the silence between them. It was as if the stylist was adhering to an unspoken request Alec had never uttered.

The flight didn't take long. There wasn't a real possibility to see details of the arena apart from the dome that it was under. It was huge and Alec tried not to stare at it. They were guided down the ladder to the catacombs, which were dimly lit. The path was narrow, only one person could walk through it at a time and the ground was a moving escalator. Ragnor didn't talk but Alec could feel his unease. People of Alicante were used to more open spaces. Alec couldn't blame him, it was suffocating at times. They walked for a long time and quickly Alec was unable to calculate anymore how long they had walked. It felt like a maze, full of twists and turns. He sometimes had the feeling they were going back into the direction of the hovercraft before they took another direction.

He had heard the labyrinth was seen as going on the longest journey you'd ever take. The anticipation, the excitement and the fear would lay heavy in one's head. You would hear the pounding of your heart in your temples and feel the sweat upon your hands. One step after the other you would walk to a place that would take you to the abyss. A final dark corridor before changing your life forever. But Alec felt okay, strangely at peace even. He moved swiftly and without restrain. There was no sound except for the resonating of their steps between the two walls of the long passageway they were taking. It didn't take long before Alec lost sense of direction. Everything looked the same and everything was mixed up. Forward was the only way to go and still he felt that the cleverly crafted underground paths that prevented him from meeting other tributes, were more intricate than needed. They were deliberately confusing. He wouldn't have been able to map it out even if he had wanted to.

The pathway expanded more and Alec could hear Ragnor sigh in relief. The peacekeepers spread out. The launch room wasn't big but it had some accommodations. Alec knew he could sit down and he probably should have but he couldn't. He put himself in rest stance while waiting for Ragnor to give him instructions. The stylist went to the beverage stations and served himself a drink.

Alec eyed the launch plate. They were filled with mines, if you were to move an inch away from its circle before the timer was out then you would get blown up. Since Jia Penhallow's games the plates were now built to retract back into the ground. It prevented the tributes from using the explosives within to their advantage. The expression to 'ascend' during the games of hunger in district 2 was a reference to the launching pad. Because this was an ascension to glory you did only once in your life. Alec kept his expression blank but he was smiling inside. He was excited to take his rightful place in the tribute tube.

Ragnor extended a glass of water to him. "Here, you should drink now." 'You don't know when you'll get water again' was a visible subtext. Alec accepted the water and drank it. He also drank the next one Ragnor offered.

"Get undressed, so I can check out what the gamemakers have planned for you." Alec did what he was told. The colours were black: Pants, underwear, T-shirt, sweatshirt and sturdy hunting boots. It felt ordinary, if not a little stretchy. It was easy to move in. The side pockets of his trousers looked useful to store things into. There was enough space in them for several knives and a gourd or bottle of water if they had one. There wasn't a lot of help needed with the dressing since they looked like pretty basic garments. Ragnor turned toward him with a red sort of robe in his hands. He took one of the sleeves and put it up to the light.

"I am not certain what material this is, but looks like it would keep you warm. The fibres and the way the cloth has been spun shows it will keep you warm at least. Not if it's freezing but it is decent enough to stand some cold."

Intrigued, Alec let himself get dressed into it. It restricted some movement but if he left it open it wouldn't be cumbersome. Ragnor took a few steps backwards assessing him. "It doesn't look or feel water repelled. I think the environment you will be in isn't going to be snowy or aquatic. What I can tell from the gear underneath your robe I think you'll be mostly on flat ground, but your shoes are sturdy enough that they'll permit climbing if it's needed. Since you have pockets in your trousers there might be a very scarce amount of backpacks." Ragnor walked around him. Alec stood still. "Your clothing will either stick out and make you a giant target to be seen miles away or it will help you camouflage. There are always two ways for this kind of bright colour. But I wouldn't discard it. There is always a use for cloth in the games, even if it's just to tear a piece away to bandage a wound."

Ragnor stood back in front of Alec, his fingers tapping his chin pensively. He then scoffed. Alec frowned, wondering what was so funny. "The design of this robe is inspired by the death row uniform." There was no mirror so Alec couldn't look. "During public executions the prisoner is dressed in this robe before going to their execution stand."

The irony didn't make them laugh or smile and silence rose up again between them. Ragnor gestured Alec to sit down. Ragnor laid down a small grooming kit on the table. "You shouldn't go to sleep with wet hair, it messes it up really badly the next day."

Alec nodded and let his hair be brushed and styled. Not that it really mattered. In a few minutes the sweat and exertion would mess it up again. But he didn't reject Ragnor. Ragnor who was uncharacteristically quiet. Ragnor who seemed to want to say a lot of things but didn't. It would have made Alec smile. But he didn't. He was relaxed and let his hair be touched.

The gong echoed. _**"Tributes are invited to take place in their launching pads."**_

Alec stood up. "It was a pleasure meeting you and working with you, Alec." If Alec didn't know better he would have guessed he heard tension in Ragnor's tone of voice. He made his way to the tribute tube. Ragnor grabbed his hand and laid down Alec's ring in his palm. Alec had been forced to give it away for inspection before they had gotten onto the hovercraft. It had been checked for traps and whether it would give him an unseen advantage in the arena. Alec slipped it on and stepped onto the launching pad.

He turned himself one last time to Ragnor. "Good luck." He saw Ragnor greeting him with the honorific military farewell stance of district 2. Alec nodded in acknowledgement and appreciated the respect Ragnor was showing. The tube closed. He put himself in rest stance as he ascended to the surface. This was it. He exhaled, determined, ready for combat; this was finally it.

The light was blinding. He had a hard time to keep his eyes open. They had spent a long time underground after all. They were in a forest area. The trees were small and unclimbable, there were dark leaved bushes. The grass was dead and looked burned black. There was fog everywhere around them. Lydia was at the other side of the tribute circle. District 1 and 4 were just as spread out as them. Next to him on his right he had one tribute of district 11 and to his left the tribute of district 8. The cornucopia looked like a wooden basket but the reflection of the sun indicated it wasn't, in fact, made of wood.

" **30, 29, 28, 27…"**

There were things on the ground. Stones or other things, Alec couldn't see it properly from where he stood. Whatever they were, one wrong foot and he would end up tumbling. He mapped out a way. No bows were in sight. The fastest way to a first weapon, which was a knives throwing belt, would be if he would get on the track of the tribute of district 7, straight line of sight. Perfect, he had his plan of action.

" **20, 19, 18…"**

He got himself ready. He knew how to do this. There was no place for failure.

" **5, 4, 3…"**

He sprinted. His legs were on fire and he heard the blood rush in his veins. He felt a tribute close to him. He elbowed them to the floor and ducked. Rolled over the ground and grasped the knives. He was back on his feet just as fast. Jace would have been proud. He clasped the belt around his waist. A spray of blood blinded him. The smell, the stench. He was sure he had some on his lips. He used the body for protection, it was still warm and incredibly heavy. He ducked again, throwing a knife in the direction the spear had come from. He had probably hit someone and had taken his aggressor out. He had to get closer to the cornucopia; a girl rushed into him, she was clawing, screaming at his chest, he took a hold of her. He stabbed, stabbed again. She was digging her nails into his neck, stomach. Ouch. Her teeth were on his arm. He stabbed, stabbed again. It took more strength to take the knife out than to plunge it into her. Why wasn't she dying ? She was choking and the blood was warm on his hands. Why wasn't she dying ? He stabbed her again in the collarbone. He felt the twist in his forearm muscle. The effort it took was more than he had expected. She finally stopped. He threw her on the ground.

He avoided another projectile thrown at him. He needed something stronger, more deadly. He was the next target of the boy of district 10. The boy was snarling at him. Alec felt himself run, not wanting to get stabbed. He ducked. Another knife had been thrown. The district 10 boy died as he spat out blood from his mouth, his co-tribute standing over him. She dislodged her knife from his throat and she made a run for it. She grasped a backpack in passing. Someone threw himself at him. He didn't know who or what. He felt fists upon his face. The pain in his nose made him cringe as he tried to protect his head. The impact of his head against the ground had made him see stars. He used his strength, straddled his assailant. He reached the first thing he could find. He hit the metal bit of the shovel against the tribute's head.

Blood, more blood. His hands got sprayed warm and he felt nauseous. But he couldn't stop. He heard the bone break. The gurgle of death died in the boy's throat. He was much, much smaller than Alec. He let go. He was dead.

His hands trembled. He took another chance to get up. Closer to the cornucopia. He heard screams and agony. He reached a backpack. There was no better weapon in it. Another girl died in front of him. She had tried to reach for the box in front of him. Meliorn smiled at Alec, satisfied. He used a spear to throw it into another body. Alec felt himself freeze.

He heard his name being shouted and he turned around, another knife in his hand. A well struck blow to the heart. Her dark green eyes looked back at him. Her mouth was open, she actually hadn't aimed at him at all. She had just tried to get the backpack behind him. Her body grew heavy, her eyes glazy. She smelled of blood. Of sweat. He tried to get the knife out of her chest but he couldn't, it was stuck between her ribs. He looked at her, unable to tear his eyes away. She was convulsing. She couldn't keep standing up. He helped her to the ground, laid her head on the floor, he sat on his knees. He should move on but he couldn't take his knife out of her body. He needed it. Needed his knife to survive. He… He…

She shuddered more and more. She smelled of exposed flesh and things that weren't supposed to be tasted metallic in his mouth. He was unmoving. Her shudders stopped. Her body didn't resist. She was limp. Alec was on his knees. He couldn't move. She just wanted a backpack. She just wanted something to survive… More screams echoed, more bodies fell. The blood. It coated his pants. He looked at her face, pried open her fingers from what she had been holding. Gourds of water. Several bottles… He had found the water.

He put most of it back. He didn't hear, he didn't listen. His fingers trembled when he closed the backpack again. He couldn't discern his arms from the redness of his robe. The stickiness of blood, it started to be dry on his hands. The coat of it crackled a little. A little bit longer and he could peel the stains away. She was leaking upon him. He still couldn't dislodge the knife from her ribs. Another scream in his ears, another death. The noise of it was deafening. He couldn't think. The dirt. The horror. People were dying. All around him, they were dying, they were dying all around him. One by one. It was a slaughter. He still couldn't take out his knife. She was dead. They were screaming. He couldn't move. He stared at her dead glazy eyes. Her blood was still leaving her body.

It stopped. The screaming stopped. But not in his head. They were still echoing in his head. Why couldn't they be quiet. They were dead they were supposed to be quiet. He had to calm himself down. Get a clear head. Clear himself from emotions.

A clear head meant survival. A clear head meant life. He had to lock himself away. But he couldn't, he was frozen and his airways had stripped themselves from their ability to be able to expand. He was suffocating. He couldn't lose it. The eyes of Alicante were on him. He couldn't let go. He couldn't scream or shout. He couldn't let it go. He had to distance himself. He had to do better. He put his palms against his head. Breathe in, breathe out. The blood on his hands. He wasn't allowed to lose it.

He was so tense he couldn't move. He couldn't freaking move.

"Alec ?" Lydia crouched to him. He hadn't heard her coming nor what she asked of him. "Alec ?"

He looked up and she looked scared. Terrified. "A stone." She shook her head as if she hadn't understood his request. "Give me a stone." His whole face was blocked and his limbs were heavy. His heart was just laying still, he could hear it but the pain was so huge it was just collapsing. He was collapsing. "Give me a stone please," he made sure his voice didn't beg. He couldn't be begging, this was only the very first few minutes in the game.

He had to empty his head, he had to feel alive. He had to scream. He had to let it out in a voiceless shout. He had to be himself. He had to become alive. He had to make sure he was still alive. They hadn't killed him. He wouldn't lose his mind. He wouldn't lose himself. 'Lydia, Lydia please.' He wasn't sure if he said it. But she seemed to be looking around for something. He had to awaken and be sure he would live another day. She extended a flat stone to him. Exactly what he needed.

It was a trick he had discovered with Jace, something they hadn't told anybody about. Something that was their secret. Something that he hadn't thought about in years until now. Something that had been akin to tradition decades ago at home. Something that would ground him. He was sure of it.

He turned his ring around his finger and raked the Adamas L on the flat stone. The sparks immediately lit up. The L was glowing white.

This was the only way.

He tugged on the sash of his robe which was sticky with blood. He lifted his T shirt.

The searing pain made him grit his teeth. His whole body focused on it. The burn ran deep through his bones. He refused to make a sound. He refused to show how it was really feeling. It took effort and focus to let it dig into his flesh, to move it around. It was reminder of Jace. A reminder of their laughs when they had recklessly burned each other. How Jace had hugged him and they just had continued sparring and using the rings to their advantage. It was a reminder of the horrifying scream Izzy had given when she had seen their injuries. How she had dragged them to the infirmary. How he and Jace didn't stop snickering like the two teenagers they were. How they had found a fib to cover the story up. How they all got grounded together doing chores. They had laughed so hard because it had been cool and something they had discovered together. Something that was theirs to keep.

It hurt. It made his whole body jolt. The smell of burning flesh intermixed with the blood but it was something he could concentrate on; block anything else from drowning his senses. He drew the mark the best he could. His hand was trembling but it was minimal. He would get through this. It was the only way. The deeper the white flame dug into his flesh, the more his head emptied. There was only the pain. Only the hurt. It was as blinding as it was deafening; it was liberating. The memories swam to the surface of his vision. He exhaled as he traced the details of the random drawing he was making on the side of his ribs. When he finally opened his eyes again he remembered. He remembered what he was fighting for. His family, his brother, his sister, Jace. He was fighting for district 2.

When he looked at Lydia she had hidden her emotions well. She didn't say anything and stood up. Suddenly he was feeling lighter. His head was empty. The fog and drowsiness made his mind float just enough for him to be able to concentrate. The pain stung unmistakably. It was lapping at his core like a rabid dog. And yet. Yet it made him feel better. He rolled down his T shirt. Awakened, he knew he had regained his focus.

He stood up, ready to face whatever had just been thrown at him.


	14. Chapter 9 Day 1 Part II

Alec stood up to assess the terrain. There were several bodies everywhere; Meliorn was clearly finishing someone off in the distance. Kaelie was deeper inside the cornucopia. She was raiding everything from the inside and tossing all kinds of things out.

Alec took time to observe everything around them. Lydia was checking everybody's pulse. She side glanced at him from time to time, but she was focused on her task. The sun was high in the sky, but its orange glow made it look more like sunset. The area around was dead black grass. The cornucopia was placed in a clearing and a ring of small white eerie trees was circling them. As he had assessed, they were too thin to climb. Their crowns were high and he couldn't see further than a few meters past them. The forest drowned into blackness after a certain point. There were no clouds and when you listened you didn't hear any birds nor the sound of wind. The temperature wasn't hot or cold. There wasn't any smell of water anywhere, just dead leaves and maybe pine.

He picked up the backpack with water and tossed it over his shoulder. He stepped over a few corpses. He crouched to check out what he had noticed on the ground earlier. Apples, rotten apples, dozens of them were spread out around the area. When he picked one up he noticed faces had been carved into them. They all had the same twisted smile and empty rotten eyes. He smelled them. The smell alone indicated it was ill advised to eat them. He threw the apple further away where it bounced a few times before digging itself into the grass. The earth beneath his fingers felt warm. Slightly pulsating even. It wasn't moist, which meant that the source of water in this arena wasn't going to be in the ground.

"11," When Alec stood up, Lydia had come to him and she just said the number. He hadn't asked but she answered his unspoken question anyway. 11 of the 24 were dead.

Kaelie was swearing while still rummaging through the cornucopia. Meliorn seemed to be wanting to move corpses. But it seemed harder than he had expected. Maybe he needed a helping hand.

"I got the water Kaelie," Alec shouted. "If that's what you are looking for."

He heard swearing. She got out. She had blood stains all over herself as well. They all had. He managed to catch the feather staff she threw at him. It was made of sturdy wood. He checked the weight. The blades were light enough that he didn't have to compensate with a different stance or change his equilibrium. He tested it out with a sharp trust. The blades slid out quite fast, albeit a bit slower than what he was used to. He tilted the staff. The retraction time was fast enough. It was a good weapon. Better than the knives he had found.

"I'm not sure how good you are with these." Kaelie extended another feather-staff to Lydia. Lydia would of course hide that she wasn't the most proficient in it so she accepted the offered weapon.

"I can alter it if you want ?" He proposed. It wasn't a question of pride. They both knew Lydia wasn't showing weakness by giving the weapon to him. It was logical that he was the one jamming the mechanism since he had been proficient in feather staves. He knew how to break it without rendering it useless. She offered it to him. He retracted the blades, studying how they were built in. He had to say that aesthetically it looked a lot more like a pitchfork. He tilted the staff and used his foot to jam the mechanism against a box. The blades would never slide out again. He tossed it back to Lydia. She seemed satisfied with it.

"Have you made an inventory of the weapons we have ?" She asked Kaelie.

"Yes and no, we still need to open the crates to check out what's in there. So far I have found: shovels, kitchen knives, throwing knives, chocolate, a gasmask, and a bunch of those dolls." To illustrate she reached for something on the ground closer to the wall of the cornucopia.

It was unsettling. The doll's face was shattered and it was missing an eye. The curly hair was sticky with dried blood and its dress was covered in mud. Its frozen smile was empty and carried no meaning. He kept down a shiver. There was no point in being scared of a simple toy.

"I propose we move the dead away first," Meliorn was slightly out of breath. His hands weren't as stained as Alec's but it had been clear he had been in close combat during the bloodbath. He had one braid in his hair that kept it from falling in front of his eyes. "Then we can further the inventory of what we have here."

They agreed it was a good idea. Suddenly the canons echoed through the arena. It startled them all. Lydia counted them in the corner of her mouth. It was loud. Alec wondered if the sound would haunt him later. When it finally stopped, they were all looking a bit lost and thoughtful.

"11," Lydia continued. "It's all the people here."

An eerie silence fell between them. Alec looked around the battlefield. They really had to move the corpses away.

Aline and Sebastian were still nowhere to be seen.

Kaelie opened one of the last crates. "Pumpkins again ?" she sighed in frustration. "What is it with all the pumpkins ?" she kicked the box and sat down on a recently opened box, moping.

They had made an inventory. Water was the resource they had the least of. Weapons were resumed to three feather staves and knives. The shovels and the dolls were the strangest thing they had made an inventory of. There were small tool boxes with wires and pliers. They had divided the bottles and gourds of water equally. Everyone was responsible for their own supply. Alec had washed his hands using mostly cloths. He still reeked of blood but at least he had lowered the chances of possible infection.

"Maybe they want us to boil them and make soup ?" Meliorn quipped. He and Lydia had arranged that the corpses could be picked up by the hovercrafts at the rim of the trees. They hadn't been collected yet.

"With what water ?" She visibly didn't have the patience for jokes. Alec looked at Lydia who shrugged. They pried open another box. Three big pumpkins with faces carved in them were staring back at them. That made 8 of them.

"Yours ?" Meliorn answered. Kaelie rolled her eyes. She didn't want to reply and keep their petty squabble going. She was exasperated enough as it was.

"I think there is more to it." Lydia took one of the pumpkins, they were quite heavy. She put it on a crate. When she smashed it with her staff they all knew she had been right. The smell of bread and soup filled the air around them. The food was stored in the pumpkins.

Instantly they all gathered to break open the pumpkins. They had enough food to sustain themselves for a few days, some had all kinds of things in there, mostly sweets. The darker pumpkins had water and the red ones had more tools. They got two medical boxes. One medical box contained material for stitches and syringes with a clear blue liquid inside that smelled of painkillers. Of course they divided everything equally again.

Alec gave the empty backpack to Lydia who didn't seem to mind that it could slow her down. All but Meliorn kept their robes on. They had planned to scout the area facing away from the cornucopia's mouth. There was no way to establish a north or a south. The sun hadn't moved in hours and since most vegetation was artificially generated, it wasn't an option to rely on the growth of moss either.

It didn't take long before they found a track. The bushes had been trampled. Meliorn was analysing it. It had been made by two tributes, one had probably fallen but they had both stuck together. It was quite impressive to see how quickly Meliorn had found the trail and was able to follow it. Tracking had never been Alec's best skill when he was on his own. Jace and he were good but Meliorn's technique was different and efficient. He was skilled. Alec rubbed his hand over the charred skin on his ribs. It still hurt.

"It's going to be dark soon." Lydia was keeping an eye on the perimeter. She also sounded wary as she said it. Alec looked around them in response.

"How can you tell ?" Asked Kaelie. She sounded bored but she was keeping her eyes on the other side.

"The sun has moved. Just a little bit and," Lydia seemed to tense up, "The temperature has dropped."

"They headed that way," Meliorn looked up from the traces as he spoke. He was pointing in a straightforward direction. "And you're right. The earth has become colder as well. It seems like the days will be quite short in this arena."

"Let's follow the track then, or we could hunt by night ? There are always tributes who start fires and become this giant beacon of light." Kaelie proposed. But Alec interjected immediately.

"We should set up camp first, we don't know what we could encounter during the night. Although I believe only a few hours have passed, a reconnaissance of the terrain is preferable. Hunting at night is only useful if we're able to set traps to lure them in." Alec tried to stay unfazed at the fact that everyone was looking at him. He wasn't used to having everyone's attention. Bizarrely, it didn't make him blush.

"Good point, let's go," Meliorn smiled.

They followed the tracks and as expected, the sun went down. The pitch black darkness overcame them and soon they almost couldn't see where they were walking. The white bark of the trees was visible enough for them to not walk into them. The difficulties laid in the roots and the bushes that sometimes made them stumble. Alec told himself that they were probably leaving an undeniable trail but here wasn't anything they could do about it right now in this obscurity. They kept walking. Their eyes had quite adjusted but it was hard to see further than a few meters in front of them. The more they moved, the more the darkness was becoming dense around them. There was still no sound of wildlife. They didn't talk or only minimally. They had all refused to make a torch. Each time Kaelie stumbled she swore. She sounded more scared than angry, but nobody pointed it out.

They walked for minutes, or was it hours ? Alec had lost track of time. He wondered when the first catastrophe would hit. When the gamemakers would start messing around with them. It was quiet, too quiet. The more they moved, the more Alec felt like they were like lost prey. It was unsettling.

"There is a house." They all stopped in their tracks. A bit further in the pitch darkness the trees seemed to part in the distance. Alec had to admit he couldn't quite see it. But Meliorn seemed to be the one with the best vision during the night. With a decisive step he walked straight ahead.

It was indeed a house. And finally, finally there was more light. The moon was crescent shaped but there were no stars. The house was made of wood at the first glance and touch. It had two floors. Lydia proposed to check around if there were more doors than just the one. There were windows, but you couldn't see through them.

A few minutes later she came back saying there was just one entry door. Once inside there was everything that made it look like a living room: Couches, a table, chairs. There was even a fireplace. No kitchen. They didn't let themselves sit down, not yet. Nobody was letting their guard down until they were truly safe. They went upstairs. There were more rooms. No beds, just empty rooms.

"Wait, there is something here." Meliorn called them together.

In one of the furthest rooms there was a chest in the middle of the room. There didn't seem to be anything else but the chest. Meliorn didn't seem to want to approach it.

"It's either a trap or a treasure. Who wants to open it ?" There was no reply from anyone. So Alec stepped forward. He knew it wasn't the smartest idea. He knew that he would either die or be rewarded.

They gathered around. Alec crouched. The pain on his ribs made him grimace, but he ignored it. There was no lock on the chest. He raked his nails under the lid. If he was to die, he preferred it to be quick. Everyone was quiet. He inhaled. He really didn't want to die like this. In one movement he opened the chest.

The blinding white light almost made him recoil. It was suddenly too much at once. He had exclaimed a groan of discontent as spots formed over his eyes. It took some time for him to readjust. But it was familiar.

"A witchlight," said Lydia. Her voice was full of relief.

They could all see each other's faces clearly now. Meliorn and Kaelie visibly didn't know what they were talking about. Alec dug into the chest and took out the glowing smooth grey stone. It was as big as the palm of his hand.

"Light can be found among even the darkest shadows," added Alec. He turned the stone in his hand. Its light beamed from every surface.

"So do we have these as torches ? Is there only one ?" Alec extended the stone to Kaelie so she could take a look at it. She held it to the level of her eyes.

Alec glanced at the chest. "It seems like it." Kaelie gave the witchlight to Meliorn. He didn't seem moved by it. He had perhaps already seen one of these.

"At least we aren't in the dark anymore. Do we set up camp here ? I'm taking the first watch if that's the case."

They all collectively agreed with Lydia. The plan was to spread themselves out over the two rooms upstairs. The downstairs living room looked comfortable but they all didn't want to be there at all. If someone entered discreetly they would be discovered and it wouldn't be hard to kill them all since there was only one way out. If they settled upstairs they would have the upper hand. They could take possible visitors by surprise at any given time. Nobody proposed to light the fireplace either. They didn't want to risk making smoke that would give away their position. As he sat down against the wall, he realised how heavy his legs felt, but also the muscle in his forearm that he had been ignoring was aching. He felt a shiver down his spine, remembering why. The dead eyes. The smell of blood. He shook his head. He had to admit it, he was tired. They decided to sit together to eat before going to sleep. Lydia was taking some of the food from her backpack. Alec still had a piece of bread in one of the side pockets of his trousers. Water wasn't scarce yet. He still had 2 bottles and a half to himself.

He was reaching for one of them when he saw Lydia reaching for some pieces of candy that had come with the pumpkin. They all had different kinds of colours, there was chocolate as well. As she popped one in her mouth, she was talking to Kaelie about the witchlight and how it was made of Adamas. Alec would have listened if it wasn't for something at the back of his mind that he didn't quite seem to be able to recall.

When he was about to turn himself away, he suddenly saw it. It was neon and blue. As fast as he could he dropped his bottle. They were all startled as he crawled and half fell on his knees to slap the candy from Lydia's hands.

"Lydia, don't !" She looked incredulously at him, as if she was seeing him for the first time. "They are poisonous." He finished. He was glad she hadn't even managed to twist the wrapper open.

"How can you tell ?" she asked. They all had a baffled expression on their face, even Alec. He sat down in front of her. His knees hurt from having dropped so fast on the floor.

"… _I wouldn't recommend them…"_

"I-I don't know, just a hunch." He let out between his teeth. He tried to close off his face so she wouldn't be able to figure it out. She frowned. He shook his head in an attempt to relax the sudden tension in his jaw. The surge of adrenaline was fading away. "Just don't eat them, not the blue ones, trust me on this."

He looked at her in the eyes. She didn't reply but she slowly nodded and Alec felt like he could breathe again. She was trusting him. It was a mistake because these were the hunger games, but he understood he could find an ally in her for at least the next few hours. Of course he didn't know if it was actually the case, if they were in fact poisonous. Maybe they just tasted awful and they were normal candies. But he couldn't take the risk. There had been enough death today.

He didn't voice it of course, and nobody asked him any further questions. Alec wouldn't have known how to answer those anyway. He sat back down against the wall. Lydia still glanced at him from time to time but nothing more. He finished his piece of bread. He rested his head against the wall and closed his eyes, his feather-staff resting in his lap. He had volunteered to take the second turn for keeping watch. His limbs quickly felt heavy and he drifted off to sleep.

There was a rumbling sound, a noise. He opened his eyes. Everything was trembling all around them. He opened his eyes in panic.

"What the fuck ?" Kaelie swore.

She was already on her feet. Alec did the same. They were all on their feet before the trembling became heavier. It was as if the whole house was shaking. It became more intense. Walls were falling, crumbling. They needed to get out of here. Lydia pushed Meliorn toward the staircase. The house was collapsing upon them. As if his whole body was on fire, Alec's breathing stopped. He secured his weapon on his back with his sash. He avoided a beam that crashed next to him. The floor caved in. The wood cracked. He stopped himself in time to not fall over his feet. He had to run. He had to get out of there. Every step he took made the planks splinter and shatter. The floor gave out.

He panicked as his arms shot out toward the remainder of the second floor. His weight knocked the breathing from his lungs, his muscles cried in pain at the effort. He caught himself in time. Everybody was downstairs by then. He let himself land on his feet. The shock of the jump reverberated through his bones. He would feel that in the morning, but it wasn't as painful as a full-on fall on his back could have been. More planks and beams dropped down. The roof was giving out. He didn't think twice to break the window with his elbow. He climbed out right on time with Lydia's help from outside. He fell down on his sides. His friend dragged him away from the collapsing house. The trembling became a roar of breaking wood and the whole house crumpled in on itself as if it had been made of paper.

The dust of it made them cough.

"What the hell was that ?" Lydia didn't often swear, but he completely understood the sentiment.

"Trick of the gamemakers ?" Meliorn coughed. "Nobody injured ?" They all responded negatively. The adrenaline was still high in their veins. They probably couldn't feel any injuries yet. Lydia helped Alec back up. He nodded a 'thanks' to her. She smiled in reply.

"But why now ?"

To answer Kaelie's question, the fog suddenly dissipated as if it had been vacuumed into nothingness. An eerie feeling woke up in Alec's gut. The kind of feeling you get when you know something bad is about to happen. There was a sound. Someone was approaching; from the woods; a figure. Alec put away the witchlight and they were yet again flooded in darkness. The Thing looked taller than most of them. And then he heard it. Humming. The humming of a lullaby.


	15. Chapter 9 Day 1 Part III

They had to move. They had to move and quick. Alec tugged at Lydia's sleeve and she nodded in response. They had all heard it. Without the witchlight it wasn't that easy. Their eyes hadn't even adjusted to the renewed darkness. They tried to retreat back into the woods. Alec let himself feel out the trees with an extended hand. He tried to step over the bushes the best he could. They probably should spread out. Whatever the Thing was that was stalking the woods, they had to get away from it as fast as possible. They all had a higher chance of survival if they weren't packed together. Alec went deeper and deeper into the forest. His eyes still weren't adjusting correctly. He hoped that whichever way he was taking would lead him out of the woods. They seemed to have been able to draw a certain amount of distance between themselves and their assailant. He noticed Meliorn wasn't far from him.

Alec concentrated mostly on his sense of hearing. He needed to know if someone else was approaching, which didn't seem to be the case. Little by little, feeling safer, he walked closer to Meliorn. It was tedious, trying to avoid stepping on bushes that seemed to pop up from nowhere. But he was managing. They didn't talk, both understanding they had to be careful. He secured his feather-staff onto his back, in case they had to break into a run.

A few meters further the forest came to an end. Glad to have more light to navigate, Alec felt a bit more at ease. However, what appeared in front of them wasn't flat ground and grass. It was a cornfield; the kind of cornfields that sometimes appeared on the television when there were things happening in district 11. The plants were big and high and way taller than Alec. He extended his hand. The plant felt genuine. The smell, however, was strange.

He let his arm disappear in it as if to check it was indeed a possible way forward. It would require effort not to trample the stalks even though they felt sturdy.

He tried to be careful. Meliorn took another path a bit further away. They advanced slowly. Hopefully the field didn't stretch out for hours and hours of walking. Hopefully they would be out of this field quite soon. His vision was fiercely reduced. He continued walking. He often pushed away the plants to the side so he could clear a path. And then Alec noticed a change, slowly but steadily. The moonlight was treacherous but it was unmistakably clear. The crimson red of his robe was changing. He stopped in his tracks to look down to check the rest of his attire. It was as if indeed the cloak was gradually taking over the same green and mud colour as the plants around him.

It was a camouflaging robe.

He raised his eyebrows. He had never seen this kind of gear before. He had been smart not to get rid of it when he had the chance. He froze. The quietness had died. A small humming sound made its way to his ears. He had to escape, continue further. It drew near, footsteps, the rustling sound of plants being trampled and pushed away was drawing near. It was coming from his right side. He didn't think twice. He started running. Meliorn turned himself toward Alec who was making noise behind him. He followed instantly. Alec was glad he didn't have to shout. It would have given away their positions immediately. The humming became louder and the heavy footsteps that didn't belong to either of them broke into a run. Alec used his renewed adrenaline rush to run even faster. The whipping of the plants against his cheeks was painful, but he couldn't care less. One leaf probably cut him in the process. He felt the ground go slightly more upward. He changed the position of his feet so he could efficiently run faster uphill. He caught up with Meliorn. The humming was becoming stronger. But Alec didn't dare to look behind him. Whatever this was, it didn't mean anything good.

Alec noticed that a bit further to his left, someone else was running. He couldn't see who it was. He couldn't see what. It wasn't Meliorn and it was definitely not the thing that was chasing them. Alec took a turn. He needed to get as far away as possible from both. He started seeing the end of the cornfield.

He wasn't relieved. He just hoped it wouldn't be another forest. The closer he got the more he realised it would have been better if it had been a forest. He was running straight up to a wall.

He took a sharp turn to the left. Meliorn swore as he almost collided with him. But he followed. Alec decided to run parallel to the wall. There had to be an opening. A moment where the wall ended where he would be able to sneak away and move on to another area. He heard the running of what was probably the other tribute that was trying to escape their chaser. His lungs were starting to burn and his legs hurt. He felt his eyes water from the speed of his attempted escape. The humming was undeniably close when suddenly Alec saw an opening in the wall. He halted. His body completely disagreed with being stopped so suddenly. He almost stumbled over. It wasn't a full opening. Fuck. It was a dip in the stone wall but it didn't lead anywhere; He didn't have a choice.

He took Meliorn's forearm and pushed him against the dip in the wall. Alec almost slammed himself against him. He felt Meliorn's lungs be knocked out of air. Alec dipped his head down and raised his cloak. He tried to cover them both completely. His feather staff fell onto the ground. Hopefully the camouflage didn't take too long to take effect. If it didn't work they would both be dead.

The humming became louder and Alec did his best to keep his ragged breathing in. He felt his head ache at the effort and his lungs burn for the need of air. He listened. The running stopped and a groan of effort was heard. An ear-splitting scream wretched his heart. Alec opened his eyes. For the first time in his life he felt goosebumps of fear lock him in place. He almost fainted. He was scared. He was really, really scared. The humming didn't stop. Nor did the cries that followed. It wasn't clear what was happening but the sounds that echoed were those of breaking flesh and wetness. The screaming continued, this time weaker. The humming still continued. Another sound of tearing bones resonated and the crying became whimpering.

There was a rustling of plants as if someone had just picked something up. Alec tensed up as the humming came close, too close. It passed their little hiding place. The heavy footsteps reverberated against the ground. Tendrils of fear were threatening to drown his mind. He listened. He couldn't let go. The whimpers sounded painful and broken. The smell of blood was overt. It lingered in his nostrils even when he heard it walk away, even when he couldn't hear the humming anymore, even when the sound of the canon resonated through the arena. He was locked in place. He didn't dare to move.

"Thank you." Meliorn looked up at Alec as he said it. He sounded as scared as him. He didn't move either and Alec felt their breathing mingle. They were both out of breath and fear induced. Alec expected Meliorn to make a joke about it, but he didn't.

"We should get moving," Alec disengaged their bodies. He rearranged his improvised sheath for his feather-staff on his back and picked it back up.

They both assessed each other for injuries. Alec had indeed been cut in his cheek by one the plants' whipping leaves. For the rest they seemed pretty okay. Meliorn took the lead, senses on alert. Alec made sure he had eyes on their back. They followed the stone wall in hope it would lead them to another part of the arena. It was too high to climb without any rope.

Yet again hours passed. Alec's mind wandered towards what had just transpired. The crumbling house had clearly been a trap set by the gamemakers to lead them toward each other. There was no such thing as resting in the arena. Alec was learning this lesson quite fast. So when they walked, they rarely took a break.

His head started to ache as the time passed. His eyes were heavy as well. He reached for his pocket to get a piece of chocolate. He would probably hate sweets before he made it out of the arena.

Meliorn halted. The sound of conversation was reaching them. He took out his knife and Alec readied his staff. Two tributes were approaching a bit further away. The corn plants were getting pushed aside. Alec recognised the voices immediately. This could go both ways. Either he talked and there was a risk of getting a knife to his head or he incapacitated them both. A combination of the two seemed more secure. He gestured to Meliorn to stay where he was.

He evaluated where they were. He walked as soundlessly as possible to their level. He was surprised he hadn't yet been spotted. Until he understood that one of them was injured.

"You're being too loud," he commented. As soon as he said it Lydia dropped Kaelie on the ground and she attacked him with her staff.

Alec blocked the first and second blow. He didn't expect Lydia to start using her feet so he got a knee to the stomach. Ouch. He almost doubled over. He managed to dodge her vertical lethal attack on his head. She was fast. But he noticed that she wasn't stopping even though she had understood it was him. He dodged the next three attacks. He didn't use the point of his feather-staff. He didn't actually want to hurt her. But doubt was sowed in his head as Lydia didn't seem to keep her blows back. He countered the next series of blows. He turned his weapon around and started to attack her with the blunt side. Her reaction time was equal to his. She almost had him cornered against the wall until he finally decided to break away from the fight. He ducked and rolled over behind her. She swept him off his feet. Alec stumbled onto the ground face first. He kept his staff in front of him to block any other blows she was going to throw at him. She didn't.

"Don't' startle me again Alec, I could have killed you." She stood over him. He would have laughed, hadn't he just been bested by her in combat. She had clearly been letting off some steam. She extended a hand and helped him back up. He still felt sore to his stomach.

"Are you guys alright ?" He asked. Lydia shrugged at his question.

"Kaelie twisted her ankle. I couldn't leave her behind. You ?" They made their way back to where their allies were supposed to be. She told him they hadn't been able to take a look at the humming assailant either.

"We came close to the thing chasing us. But we managed to hide. It killed someone else instead." She nodded in acknowledgement.

Meliorn had dragged Kaelie out of the cornfield to make her rest against the wall. She didn't look particularly weakened. Maybe a little pissed off ? It was hard to see in this darkness.

"You guys haven't killed each other yet ?" She sounded annoyed. As he approached, Meliorn asked her what happened. "Tripped over a root," she answered. "But I'll be okay. It just needs some rest or something. I already twisted my sash around it for more support." She was gesturing toward her foot.

Alec took out the witchlight and they all collectively groaned at its bright light. He extended it to Lydia. "Come, I'll help you up," he said. He hoisted Kaelie up. She weighed more than he expected. She grunted in discontent, probably hating that she was encumbering them. Alec would have felt the same, which is why he had proposed to be her support.

They put themselves in motion. Lydia took the lead, then Alec with Kaelie, and Meliorn kept his eyes on the back. There was a comment that it was still dark out there. They all wished dawn would break soon but their wishes stayed unanswered. When the wall finally stopped, they were left with a choice: to continue the way they had been going, or to go to the path upwards from the opening in the wall. They took a break to eat, but not to rest. Alec felt his joints and muscles ache. His stamina usually kept up but his headache was starting to seriously inconvenience him even more.

They agreed to go upwards. The cornfield made it hard to anticipate any possible ambush. Right when Alec was going to pick Kaelie up again he was stopped by Lydia. She was extending her bottle of water to him. He tried not to look as baffled as he felt. He didn't know how to react and she gave him a knowing look that she wouldn't let him refuse. He mechanically reached for it, uncapped it and drank. One swallow. He wouldn't take more than he needed.

"Keep it," she said. "You lost yours during the house collapse."

He looked at her. He had indeed lost a bottle when he had almost crash-landed in the house. He hadn't said anything about it but she had noticed it. He knew better than to refuse. But he didn't wave it off. Sharing water was something that had meaning in district 2. It was a sign of friendship, care, but most importantly it was a sign of trust. He didn't know if it was a good idea. If she really meant it. If it was ploy for her to then backstab him later. But somewhere in his heart he knew. It was a promise of an alliance that would stay until the end. He wasn't sure if he deserved that yet. They didn't speak of it either. It was a silent, wordless promise, like a lot of things in district 2.

The pathway up wasn't steep. In the earth irregular cobblestones started to appear, which made walking easier. Alec felt Kaelie trying to walk as much as she could on her own so he let her. She wasn't complaining even though he could feel her wince. He admired her willpower. She still had energy to spare.

It didn't take long for them to understand what they were walking up to. In the distance the shape of a two floor house was drawing itself against the moonlight. Another set of trees was circling it as if to make sure that any escape would be slowed down. Yet again Alec felt like they were walking right into a trap. And yet again they decided to go up that way regardless.

It was a bad idea and they probably would regret it later.


	16. Chapter 9 Day 1 Part IV

"I propose we go inside and get cosy ?" Everyone eyed Meliorn. It had been a bad joke. The more they approached, the more Alec felt something was off. He halted. There was a light coming from the house. The downstairs windows were open. You could almost hear the conversation coming from the building. But that wasn't it. They all separated. Kaelie stayed to have a view on the entrance door while the others including Alec would go around. Alec almost resigned himself to the fact there wasn't anything until he saw it. There; on the side, only one window was open on the second floor. More interestingly, a rope was hanging from it. It was almost indiscernible, if only it hadn't been for its shadow. Alec crouched. He checked the ground. The rope hung out in such a way that you couldn't see it from the inside if you climbed it. It didn't look trapped either. There were knots all over. Their tightness indicated that they had been already used. His first gut feeling had been right. There was somebody who had snuck inside through the upstairs window.

He knew how to do this so he confidently tugged on it. It still felt stable and since it was out of sight, he decided to climb it. The effort made him forget his headache as the adrenaline coursed through his veins. When he hoisted himself up he felt the burn in his muscles more than before. He got in, hopefully as soundlessly as possible. There was a light source. He could feel and hear it. They had lit the fireplace downstairs. Like in the other house the upstairs was divided into different empty rooms. There was no chest to be seen. He followed the wall to avoid walking in plain sight. The plan was to surprise the tribute that had snuck upstairs.

It didn't take long for Alec to see him. Sebastian was peering at the tributes downstairs through a removed plank of wood in the floor. Alec unsheathed a knife from his belt. Sebastian had clearly not heard him.

Alec was quick. He blocked Sebastian's arms before he even moved. He swept the man to the floor. It wasn't soundless but the wood was thick enough that it muffled most of the impact. Sebastian clearly hadn't expected him but he had kept his focus from not even exclaiming a groan even while being attacked. Alec held him into a shoulder lock, his knife pressed to Sebastian's throat. Sebastian was still struggling against his grip. Alec couldn't let himself relax under any circumstances because it wouldn't be too hard to break free if Sebastian really wanted.

"Long time no see," he whispered into Sebastian's ear. He felt the tribute stiffen under him.

"Release me at once." He still struggled against Alec's grip. He felt strong and not as exhausted as Alec felt.

"Will you kill me if I do ?" Alec asked. He hooked one of his feet behind Sebastian's legs, preventing him from moving even more.

At that moment, cold metal slid right under Alec's chin. He immediately stopped struggling to keep Sebastian in place. One move would push his neck into the blade.

"He might not be able to, but I would if you don't release him." Aline's voice was just a whisper and Alec felt like his plan had backfired on him. He let Sebastian go.

"You have fled the cornucopia, I thought we had an arrangement," Alec gritted between his teeth. Was this the moment where he would meet his end ? Because he had been too impulsive ? Sebastian had gotten up and moved away from the duo.

"We have, I stay true to my word." Aline disengaged the knife from his throat. Alec looked up at her, hiding his relief. Her knife was one of the biggest he had seen in the arena. It would be able to slice quite deeply into a throat if the wielder used it with a bit of speed and strength.

"What was the plan ?" Alec asked, gesturing toward the peephole in the floor.

"Attract them upstairs. Maybe use one of them to lure the others." Sebastian answered. He was massaging his neck as if he was still feeling Alec's arm around it.

"Who is it ?" Alec didn't know why it mattered to him. He wondered if it was a sign of weakness. Maybe it was just to be sure they knew whom was awaiting them downstairs and what challenges it would entail if they were to attack them straight on.

"The singing guy, then the two of from district 7." Alec nodded to Aline, both tributes from 7 looked feral. The girl especially had more stamina than she looked likely to possess.

"We were going to drop these from the opening. The boy from 7 is keeping watch. He is mainly falling asleep from time to time." Sebastian took out a piece of cloth. Its content was little chocolate balls Alec hadn't seen yet.

"It's from the blue wrapped candies. They are full of cyanide. You notice it from its bitter almond smell." Aline added to his unspoken question. Alec felt some kind of contentment flood over himself as he understood that he had been right on time to stop Lydia from eating any of those.

"I'll cover their possible escape route from the stairs," said Alec. He didn't want to share anything with his newfound allies yet. Aline nodded. She would sneak up on them from the back. Sebastian would make sure he would trap the tribute if they were to try and get through to the other rooms. Even if it was most unlikely.

The plan was set. Aline poured some of the candies down. The response wasn't immediate, apart from a questioning sound of 'what' and 'how'. Alec glanced at Aline as he heard the boy from downstairs wake up his companions.

"There is candy falling from the ceiling." His friend clearly grunted. The other woke up at the conversation. "I'm gonna check upstairs." Alec took out his feather-staff. He would be able to sweep people off their feet if it was needed.

"Bat, I don't think it's a good idea." The boy got upset. He said something about being hungry and made his way toward the stairs. They all readied themselves. Aline had left the cloth with the poisoned candies on the floorboard. It indeed distracted the tribute. Bat crouched to inspect the cloth full of candies. Aline moved in, she elbowed him at the back of the head and straddled him. He turned and punched her. Alec couldn't keep up with their wrestling so he kept an ear out for what was going downstairs. The girl ran up the stairs. She didn't see Alec at all. She was about to jump on Aline with a knife but Alec stopped her. He trapped her with her staff. The wood was on her throat. He was trying to choke her.

"Maia, get out of-." The sentence died in his throat as Aline sliced her knife through it. The girl went wild. She elbowed Alec and rammed them both against the nearest surface. He saw black spots in front of his eyes. The air was knocked out of his lungs as his head bounced back against the wall. The slight loosening of his grip was all it took for Maia to break free. A canon resonated. She was groaning. Aline didn't have the time to get up. She ran through the rooms; when Sebastian tried to stop her, she pushed him aside.

She wasn't going to… To everyone's astonishment, Maia did indeed run herself through the window. Alec just had the time to shake the black spots away to see her jump out of the window. She was probably going to break her legs. Sebastian hurried to the window to see it happen. "She is getting away," he shouted. He lifted one leg over the edge to follow her.

"Don't be stupid, Sebastian," Aline's voice was firm but desperate. She sounded very protective. "She was able to make that jump, you can't. Don't risk it !"

Alec saw Sebastian hesitate. He saw him weighing the odds. He didn't follow her. Alec then remembered there were three of them. He rushed downstairs. Of course the last one had fled. He groaned and went outside. Duplesse was nowhere to be seen. Lydia was looking annoyed.

"I saw what happened, did you really think you could do this on your own ?" She sounded upset. Meliorn came out from the bushes, he was out of breath.

"She is really fast despite having jumped from that height. I couldn't catch up. If we had known you were planning on attacking, Lightwood, we might have gotten them together." Meliorn crossed his arms as he spat out the words at Alec's face. "I thought we were allies."

Alec shrugged, "It wasn't my plan." He sheathed his feather-staff. "Where is Kaelie ?" Nobody answered. He saw his two allies relax when Aline and Sebastian came out of the house.

"Now I see why Alec didn't wait for us. You didn't have any cover from outside. We could have done a better job together." Lydia's tone was filled with bitterness. Aline took long strides to just stop right in front of her. Alec wondered if they would break into a fight. This wasn't productive and helped none of them. If it escalated he would step in between them.

"You are right," said Aline. She was tensing up her jaw. "I had, however, put traps outside."

Alec heard Meliorn apologise. "Doesn't matter, whoever we're not getting now, we'll get them later."

The tribute death cannon fired. They all looked surprised at each other. The computerised voice of the arena resonated :

" **10 tributes remaining.** "

Kaelie then appeared from out of the forest. She wasn't limping anymore. "Got 'em !" she shouted. When she joined them she explained that she had been able to ambush the running Kirk Duplesse who got a freshly cut throat in response. Thanks to her, the plan hadn't been a complete failure.

They all sat down together and built up a camp together outside of the house. Sebastian reported it had suddenly melted out of nowhere. To emphasize his story, he had shown a huge burn mark on his thigh that looked mostly healed. If it was still painful ? He didn't answer. Nobody liked to show any weaknesses. Kaelie had found a medical syringe in Duplesse's pockets which explained why her foot suddenly seemed cured. Originally they had refused to use a syringe for that purpose but since it hadn't been from the group's supply, nobody made a big deal out of it.

They lit a fire and proceeded to draw a map on the ground. From the cornucopia ou,t Aline and Sebastian had explored the more left side of the arena. There were two houses they had encountered, an empty one with huge walls and no other floors. It had been completely devoid of rooms. Then there was the one they set camp at, the one that melted every so often. The rooms would get extremely hot and all of a sudden things became like liquid lava. It had originally driven them out. But they had stayed in the area. A few hours later the house had been rebuilt as if nothing had happened. They had decided to make the house into a possible trap for any other tributes that would be curious enough to explore it. They tracked down the three tributes and left clues for them to find the house. Sebastian added that they had been talking about things being buried underground until most of them fell asleep on the couches. That had maybe been an hour before Alec and the others arrived.

Meliorn explained what had happened to the house that the other part of the group had been in. How it had crumbled into a million pieces without warning.

"Have you met the thing ?" he finished his explanation with that question. Aline and Sebastian looked at each other and shook their heads. "It hums, it sounds female and is extremely fast; it almost got me and Lightwood. It killed one of the other tributes." It didn't seem to ring any bells.

"We haven't seen nor heard it. One of the gamemakers' mutations ?" Aline seemed to think while she asked the question. She had the habit of caressing her chin like her mother.

"Usually mutations have a function. They are there to draw us together to kill each other." Alec added. "I believe it can see in the dark, it had no problem tracking us through the cornfield past the pathway cobblestones. We weren't able to get a look at it." He sighed. His headache had come back since the adrenaline had died down in his veins. His fingers rubbed his temples absentmindedly . He was used to staying awake for longer periods than that. Even in the institute you were trained to stay awake for consecutive days with a minimal amount of sleep. He was just feeling a bit numb.

"If it comes at dark we always have this." Sebastian took something from his backpack. Alec immediately recognised night vision goggles. "We will see it coming."

There was a relief from tension coming from almost everyone. Suddenly things felt safer, manageable. Their chances at survival seemed higher than ever. Two took the first watch and Alec didn't feel like he could sleep at all. He felt himself drift in and out of sleep. After what Alec presumed was an hour he decided to give up. He flung his robe, which he had been using as a blanket, back on and sat down with Kaelie. They exchanged a few words, even friendly conversation. The night didn't seem to end. Alec was keeping watch with Aline when the anthem boomed over the arena. The announcement asked for respect to the fallen. Their portraits flickered away one after the other in the midnight sky.

Alec didn't look away, they had all fought bravely. They had all tried to survive. He felt his heart race to a stop when the face of the girl from 8 was displayed. He still heard the gurgle of the blood in her throat as he stabbed and stabbed her again. He kept his eyes open, not sure if he was still registering the portraits. His hands itched as if they desperately needed to get cleaned again. His nails felt as if they were out of place. He felt himself rub them. He tucked his hands under his arms. The itchiness didn't go away, nor did the sudden fog in his mind. He got distracted when he heard Lydia mutter a prayer. The anthem had woken all of them up. When the last portrait vanished, the sun peeked over the horizon. With relief and dread they saw the sun rise up to its apex within a few minutes. The first day in the arena had passed.


	17. Chapter 9 Day 2

'Once we're back at the cornucopia we can decide to further explore the other corners of the arena.'

Everyone had agreed to Alec's suggestion. They wrapped up their camp and started marching. Since it was daylight it was easier to navigate the environment. The paths seemed clearer and even the trees didn't block as much light as they had seemed to yesterday. There was an artificial breeze and the sound of wind. They had walked down the cobblestone path and through the cornfield. It had bloomed into a more vast terrain of black grass and rock formations that sometimes were high enough to cast shadows.

There was banter. Kaelie talked about how things were in district 1, about how her parents worked in the diamond polishing quarters. Sebastian talked about how fishing went in district 4. How he had been way better at working with nets and how much he had hoped to be in an aquatic arena. Meliorn and Alec tracked down trails. They weren't always in tune with each other but Alec learned quite fast, and soon they were able to navigate through the area without walking in circles.

Aline was the most quiet one. Not that she didn't want to be part of any conversation. It was more as if she was deliberately keeping her thoughts and experiences to herself, even when a few of them tried to pry some information from her. Like how things were at home since she lived in a house in the victor's village and how training with her mother went. She only replied minimally. People that weren't family weren't allowed in the house and peacekeepers guarded the area from jealous and prying eyes. Aline didn't seem to like the conclusion Lydia had paraphrased but Aline didn't correct her on it. It was as if she knew about some things that the others didn't and she wasn't willing to share. Maybe she had been able to talk with Magnus Bane at the party; Or her mother had trained her with some inside knowledge that only victors were able to access. Alec couldn't figure her out.

They took a break every so often. It felt as if they had been walking for a few hours now. They were supposed to reach the cornucopia soon. There was something in the air. Alec could feel it. The wound on his ribs was healing okay. He didn't feel it sting anymore but he wasn't sure. He didn't like to check the mark when everyone was around. When he finally did after relieving himself of a full bladder, he lifted his shirt. The carved mark had turned really dark, almost black at certain edges. It would probably peel eventually. The ridges would probably be the first to go. He picked at it. The slight tearing made him grit his teeth. The exposed skin looked pink and freshly second degree burnt. It was healing well. He decided to leave it like that.

His attention was drawn back to the group. They were preparing to leave. The sky was changing to grey. Clouds were forming. It was subtle enough to almost not be noticed since the sun was still shining brightly.

Nothing prepared them for what they saw next. Lydia almost tripped as she made her way quickly to take another look. Where before the cornucopia had overlooked and cast a shadow upon the dead black grass, there was now an enormous cavity. The sinkhole had swallowed up the whole cornucopia. Any of the supplies that it still had held were now gone. There was a cold traction. The wind was swallowed in. It was massive. Alec felt bold and dared to take a few steps forward. He wasn't afraid of heights. But staring into the cold black hole was nothing but unsettling. It was as if any light was devoured into that void. He felt a chill run down his spine.

"Impressive, it is as if the launching room has never even existed." Said Aline. She didn't approach the sinkhole at all. She was even guarded. Alec understood. Something was not right. The gamemakers were planning on doing something. It inspired the same feeling of dread as when they had entered the crumbling house.

Meliorn approached and picked up one of the carved rotten apples. When the apple disappeared from view into the darkness there was no sound of impact. The hole lead to nothingness. Alec and Meliorn shared a glance.

"There is another chest here." They all looked at Sebastian. He had found a chest and was dragging it out from underneath the root of a broken tree. Intrigued, Alec went over to see. It was identical to the chest they had found in the first house. But this time it was locked. The lock in question was made of metal and was rusty and corroded.

Sebastian inspected it closely. "It doesn't look trapped. Can you pass me a shovel ?" Lydia searched her backpack to look for one of the small shovels that had come from the pumpkins.

"Wait," said Aline but Sebastian had already broken the lock. They all turned toward her surprised. "There is something moving in the herbs."

She was unable to finish her sentence as the roaring sound of wind elevated into the air. The sky became grey. Clouds covered the sun. A whirlwind sucked in the breeze between leaves to get absorbed by the sinkhole. They covered their eyes as the wind whipped around and threatened to make them lose their balance. The chest broke open.

Lydia's scream froze Alec in place. They poured out like water from an overfull jar. There were so many of them you couldn't count. All scurrying out of the chest as if to invade the whole wide world. Spiders. Hundreds and hundreds of spiders. Alec couldn't move. He was petrified with fear. His whole body was going into shutdown. He was staring into the distance; not registering correctly what was happening. He could feel them. Over his feet, his legs, even in between his clothing, on his skin. He didn't know they could make sound but they did. Hundreds and hundreds of spiders did make sound.

Their hairy bodies; they itched; bit him; crawled over. He didn't dare to scream like Kaelie. What if they got into his mouth ? He didn't dare to run like Lydia. What if they followed him around ? Another scream. The ground rumbled. He wondered if he was going to faint, his whole body was shaking.

He thought he heard his name being shouted. The blood in his face retracted. He was going to die. He was going to lose his mind. If he wasn't going to piss himself first.

It was monstrous; its eight eyes; its mandibles; the hairs on its legs. He felt his cheeks grow wet of tears. His whole body was tense muscle and rusted bones. The ground didn't tremble. The sound of its joints creaked as it hoisted itself up from the void. Its see-through spit, from the gaping mouth, wetted the area around them. His heart was quivering. It moved; the others moved. It was as if the spiderlings decided to contain him; trap him. He couldn't remember how to move.

He felt a hand around his forearm. He couldn't look away. His eyes were out of control. He was crying. Kaelie was crying. Aline was shouting in his ears. He couldn't hear her. He knew it took effort to drag him away. But his legs didn't cooperate. Lydia ran away safely, she was out of sight.

He felt himself cower with every step. His knees gave out. He fell onto the ground. The monstrosity moved like a predator preying on its next victim. Aline dragged Alec over the floor. The spiders nicked his skin as some of them were squashed by his weight. She was still shouting but he couldn't hear her. He felt the terror seep into his bones. He was going to pass out. He was breathless. Aline ran over to Meliorn. She helped him up. It was Kaelie who was seized. The fang sunk all the way through her leg. Her screaming became screams of pain. Alec still felt bites cover his body. But most spiders had fallen off. He grabbed toward the dead grass. She was going to die. He couldn't let himself be like that, he had to get a grip. He tried to get back on his feet. He couldn't, they were trembling too much. He shook his head. He felt his whole body itch.

It sprayed venom. Aline and Sebastian avoided it by ducking. Alec could only watch. He couldn't get up. Sebastian threw himself at the mandible. Kaelie screamed as it moved around to get rid of its attacker. Sebastian was raging and stabbing the limb. Kaelie fell on the ground. A leg wrapped itself around Sebastian to throw him off its face. Kaelie got up, screaming his name. Her leg was coated in blood and her robe was torn. Sebastian stabbed the leg with another knife and the Monstrosity shrieked and wavered. He jumped off the spider when its leg was overtaken by convulsions. He helped Kaelie to run.

Alec felt himself recoil and tried to crawl away. His back met a tree. The giant spider moved toward the two tributes; Sebastian was seized. He was firmly holding Kaelie by the arm. Aline ran over to help them. Kaelie screamed and shoved Sebastian off her. Alec couldn't believe his eyes. Aline stopped running for a moment before she grabbed Kaelie and helped her to get away. The spider enclosed Sebastian with its other legs and mandibles. The fangs pierced his abdomen and brought the body to its mouth. The scream died out as its owner broke into pieces mauled by mandibles and legs. Having found a victim and fresh blood, the spider started retreating. All of its small children took a 180 degree turn and scurried their way toward the hell pit where they had partially come from. The spider disappeared, taking Sebastian's remains with it.

Alec trembled. He still felt as if the tiny spiders were _still_ crawling over him. His heart was pounding in his temples and the whole world seemed to have disappeared in front of his eyes. He still wondered if he was going to pass out. He hugged himself. He tried to brush off any remaining spiders on his arms; but there were none. His nerves were jolting and he knew he had cried. He closed his eyes: The screams; The sensation; The sound. It echoed back in his ears. He looked up. Kaelie was crying, clutching her leg. Aline wasn't helping her. No-one was helping her; Meliorn was sitting at the root of the trees; His expression was avoidance. Aline looked tense. Her breathing was more regular and calm. Alec looked back at Kaelie. She was trying to desperately ask for the syringe in Lydia's backpack. Rain started to fall.

Alec felt the cuts, the bites, they were oozing. Some of the wounds would heal easily, others would take some days. Aline's facial expression was hard, closed off. She was keeping her thoughts and emotions to herself. Alec closed his eyes. Sebastian's smile floated before his eyes. How they had shared a joke at the training centre and earlier this evening. Alec became angry. Rage overcoming fear, fury overcoming grief. When he got up he didn't feel his legs tremble. He felt his whole body ache but it didn't stop him.

Kaelie stopped crying. She stopped talking all together. She looked at him in fear. He strode over to her. Aline took a few step backwards, letting it all play out. Kaelie stood up. She was limping. The rain poured down harder. It wetted them all. The ground started to smell of burnt ashes and wet grass.

"How could you ?" he spat; his face contorted in an expression of ire he had yet to remember ever having had. "How could you ? He tried to save your life." He flexed his hand, trying to find a grip on reality. The blood in his veins was boiling.

She pursed her lips, trying to master her own anger. "It was him or me. I had to make a choice." Her tone of voice was cutting and disdainful.

He balled his fists. He had never been pushed like this, never had felt this compulsion before. Never had he felt anything like this. Betrayed. They all had been betrayed. Where his body had felt cold of fear only a few minutes ago, it was now set ablaze in fire and revenge.

"You shoved him off you, I was there to save you both." Aline sounded just as angry. Just as upset. Alec noticed she had her knife in hand.

"I didn't," Kaelie lied. She had taken a few steps backwards. "It was him or me. He made the bad decision to go hand-to-hand combat with that thing. I didn't push him to do anything."

Alec heard Aline snap her own mouth shut in disbelief. And Alec felt angry; so, so angry. He felt himself sweat. "You killed him. You betrayed him. You betrayed us."

The girl shifted from one foot to the other. Her hand was going to her belt of daggers. Her facial expression was arrogant, petty. It rendered Alec furious. "It was him or me; you would all have done the same."

Alec felt himself snarl internally. Never. He would have never done the same. And then it hit him: The realisation there was only one way forward from this, only one _rightful_ way forward from this. Ha. It was logical even. "I can't let you live."

Kaelie's face sagged and anger adorned her facial features. She took a few other steps backwards and unsheathed a dagger. "Excuse me ?" she asked as if she hadn't heard him the first time.

Disloyalty meant punishment. Betrayal meant death. Traitors deserve execution.

"I can't let you live." He repeated. He didn't feel as upset. He didn't feel as angry. It felt coherent. They couldn't have someone like this in their alliance. He couldn't let her get away with this.

She tried to make a run for it. He grabbed Aline's knife and was on Kaelie mere seconds after. He dodged a thrust of her dagger. But he was taller than her. If she hadn't been injured, he wouldn't have been stronger than her. They would have been equal. He didn't wait he didn't let it play out. He sunk the blade deep into her throat. Her eyes glazed, her body fell flat. Her mouth coated with blood and her struggling stopped.

The canon didn't fire once. It fired twice.


	18. Chapter 9 Day 3

He padded the ground to see if there was a way for him to sleep better. But whichever angle or position he tried, it was useless. His sides and stomach hurt. So did his fresh marks. The stinging feeling still seeped into his mind like a calming fog. He could feel himself at peace thanks to their pain inducing sensations. They were bigger, messier, trying to carve into the skin of his back might not have been the best chosen placement. When he turned on his side he noticed Lydia looking at him. She was observing him. They were facing each other. Her hair was messy and she had dirt all over her face.

Even if the rain had managed to give them a new source of water and the possibilities for them to wash themselves a little bit, she looked beaten down. As they all were. At least the fresh cuts of the spider bites had been cleaned and they had stopped itching. The comfort of the city of glass was starting to be a distant memory. The food that wasn't always sweets, all sorts of beverages that hydrated the body and clean clothes were becoming things akin to fantasies and old dreams. When he closed his eyes briefly his mind wandered toward silken sheets and yellow lights; warmth and languid caresses.

"Why do you do it ?" he opened his eyes again at Lydia's question, letting his recollection of things he had repressed _– because he couldn't let himself –_ fade away. Her eyes looked tired but the glim of curiosity in them wasn't something that would ever die out.

"I don't know," he answered, "it seems like the right thing to do."

She frowned, he turned on his back. The pain almost made him wince but he wouldn't give it away. There was no way to look at the sky from where they had set up camp. There was only the dead silent forest. Nobody had yet to die today.

"I don't think we should forget who we are." He turned his face toward her. "This way I stay focused. I remember who I am every time I do it." There was certain relief to it as well. But that he didn't voice. He studied her face, trying to find out if he was making any sense to her. If there was anyone who was going to understand him it was her, his companion from district 2. To her he could open up. "It's also a way to remember who they are." 'They' was implicit, 'they' had many names and faces. 'They' stretched out to beyond the arena. 'They' was more than just friends. "It's also a way to neither forget nor forgive."

It took time for the information to sink in. But gradually he noticed Lydia nodding. She reached out to him. His hand met hers. He would normally never have touched anyone. Not in this way. Not in the circumstances they were in; on a battlefield amidst bloodshed and tears. He interlaced their fingers. His heart felt heavy and clouded. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to think or follow anymore. He felt lost and abandoned in this arena. He knew which direction he wanted to go, he knew what he wanted to achieve. But this was nothing he had prepared for; nothing he could have possibly prepared for. Right now, he needed this, the touch of their hands. It wasn't intimate, it wasn't what Alicante might think it could be. It was an understanding, a mutual benefit. She was his grounding point and hopefully he was somehow hers. And just like that, he felt a little bit less lost, a little bit less alone. He closed his eyes.

He understood he had slept when in the dregs of unfinished dreams of blood and screams he could hear the rustle of fabric. His eyes shot awake. Meliorn had stood up. Alec who had all his senses on alert sat up, his hand ready to strike with his feather-staff. Lydia was still sleeping. Aline was unmoving, still watching the other side.

"What is it ?" Alec asked. Meliorn had the night vision goggles pressed against his eyes. Without breaking his line of sight he gestured Alec to come over.

This didn't mean anything good. He wondered if he should wake Lydia from her sleep. But since Meliorn wasn't raising the alarm yet, rhere was probably a reason : the threat was maybe not big enough yet. Aline turned around to see him walk over to Meliorn. Alec repeated his previously asked question.

"There is something between the trees, take a look." He gave the goggles to Alec.

He scouted the area between the trees, there was nothing unusual, he was about to give the goggles away until he saw movement. Instantly, he focused his vision on it. He almost dropped his goggles when an elongated white face peered from behind a tree. Its jaw fell open like it was dislocated, where its eyes were supposed to be there were just empty eye sockets, it had no nose. It looked straight at them as if it could clearly see where the group was.

"It's been following us for a while. I've sometimes had the feeling of being observed. I think that thing is the reason why," said Meliorn. Alec could sense the tension in his voice. He had felt it too, the unseen eyes watching him from afar.

"It never approached us though," Alec commented. The creature hid itself again behind the tree. Alec changed his stance, ready to take action. He felt alarmed.

"Did it hide ?" Alec nodded. "It sometimes does that." Alec tried to track it with the goggles but nothing was giving it away.

"What even is this thing ?" He gave the goggles back to Meliorn who shrugged. The tribute from 1 tried to track the thing but visibly couldn't find it anymore either. He looked back at Alec. He was tired. His face had fewer cuts and bruises from the spider attack. His braid was filthy and he had long since given up on trying to redo it. There was even a hint of beard growth that Alec would see on himself on the fifth day if he was left unshaven.

"I don't know, another mutation perhaps? I don't understand its functionality yet-"

Aline stood up as she interrupted them. Her knife was firmly in her hand. "We need to go. It's approaching again."

Nobody questioned her word. As fast as he could Alec woke Lydia. She seemed to take longer than anticipated so Alec packed her backpack. They didn't have a lot of things to pack anyway. Their resources were getting low. Alec started to hear it once they were set and ready, the humming of the lullaby.

"Leave the fire on," he gritted through his teeth, trying not to shout to Meliorn who had been trying to put out the fire. "It will bait it out."

Aline opened their escape route, then Lydia and Meliorn, Alec knew it was a risk to be last but he took the opportunity to keep his group safe with both hands. He wanted to observe the thing. Once they were deep enough in the forest he dared to glance behind them. 'Shush', he halted all of them. Morbid curiosity drove them all to look back. It was dangerous. It meant that if anything tried to attack them from the front they wouldn't see it coming. But Alec knew he wouldn't be able to look away even if he wanted to. He was using a tree as protection, to be out of sight, while the others crouched.

She looked monstrous, colossal, taller than Alec, taller than anyone he had ever met. Her head was hidden by some kind of mask that looked like the remains of a bear skull. It looked like the jaws of it swallowed her head and hid her eyes. Her trousers were blue and her sash was a patchwork of different kinds of faded fabrics and washed off colours. Her shirt, which had once been white, showed her shoulders and bare arms. She was bare footed. Dried blood was everywhere on her. But the axe was what caught his attention. It was as big as his feather-staff and its shape was made for killing, not for taking down trees. Even the ones attached to her sash, the smaller ones, weren't made for lumber at all. She was distracted by the fire and paced around like a predator looking for its prey. She used her axe to break down most of the encampment they had set up. Her grunts were half animalistic, half humane. She put out the fire with her bare feet. It didn't seem to hurt her. She was definitely not human. It was now dark again. Right when the last speck of wood gave away its light, she started to hum again.

"We need to go," Lydia whispered. She tugged on Alec's sleeve. He didn't know if it had been a good or a bad idea to finally grasp the opportunity to take a look at their chaser. One by one they disengaged from the scene.

They didn't use torches and Aline only minimally used the witchlight to guide them. They didn't run as much as they tried to walk fast. The humming mutt didn't seem to follow them and went in the opposite direction. They distanced themselves the best they could. It was almost gone until the silence was broken by the sound of crushed leaves and broken twigs. They all shifted into combat stances. Since there was no lullaby yet it could be anything, even something they hadn't encountered yet.

"She's over there !" Aline broke into a run. They all did. Between the trees someone was running. It wasn't a mutt, nor a thing, it was a tribute. The girl from district 6.

"Corner her," Alec shouted. They spread out. There was no way he could touch her with his feather-staff so he fastened his weapon to his back. He took a throwing dagger in his hand. The tribute was also incredibly fast. Faster than what she had shown in the training room. Wait. Was she laughing ? She absolutely was. And she was guiding the mutation right. to. them. Shit. Alec made a double take. He had to think fast.

"Take the right side, I'm going to distract it." He bolted toward the other tribute, trusting the others would do as he said. The girl still had her robe on. The rustling of his run would certainly attract attention and it didn't take long before he heard the lullaby come close again. He could see the girl from between the trees. He threw his dagger. It missed. He threw another. It only grazed her. And she laughed. She laughed as if it was the most hilarious thing ever. The humming came closer and closer. He could hear the heavy footsteps of its owner break into a run. He decided to take a leap. He was running next to the tribute. She had stopped laughing and he could hear the physical exertion from her mouth. He couldn't lose another dagger. He had to stop her from running. He shoved her against the tree. She screamed at the impact. Her eyes and blonde curls looked nothing like they had been in the interviews. Hopefully her stumble would distract the mutation.

He bolted the other way. Of course he hoped that the mutation wouldn't follow. Of course he couldn't have nice things when he heard the thing start to pursue him and not the fallen tribute. He snarled under his breath. He couldn't see the others. Hopefully they got away. He was faster, he had to be faster. He mustered all he had, all he could have. When he saw Lydia appear from nowhere and grab him to the ground, he let himself be guided under a bush. They used their robes as camouflage. Lydia's colours had already blended with the bush when the mutation came closer. His heart was pumping in his ears. He felt like he was going to throw up. He couldn't, he shouldn't, he tried to keep his hyperventilation down. He dug himself into the ground. His fresh marks stung and seeped into his bones. He became quiet almost instantly.

When the mutation passed he could observe her feet. The toes and calves were dirty and lacerated. It smelled of dried blood and rotten grass. He didn't have a clear look from where she went next. She didn't stop humming nor running. He had to admit, this mutation ? It mostly looked human but it didn't have the stamina of nor the reaction of a human. It was mostly a beast. He stayed there, unmoving, until the lullaby wasn't heard anymore.

"You missed," Lydia was looking at him. They were still on the ground. It took him a few seconds to understand what she was referring to. "Not once, but twice."

His mouth gaped open in surprise at her audacity. She probably did it to lighten up the mood. But it didn't make him feel any less offended. On the contrary. "Shut up," he muttered. He hated his lack of skills to be voiced out loud. Yes, he wasn't as good as he could be. Daggers were made for hand-to-hand combat, long distance combat was always reserved for bows. Shooting arrows wasn't nearly the same as throwing knives.

He helped her from underneath the bushes. Some twigs were stuck in her hair. "It's cruel for the gamemakers to not give you what you're most proficient in." He shrugged, trying to sound as detached as he could when he agreed. "It is what it is." He still felt as if she had bruised his pride.

He looked around. Right when he was going to inquire where the others were they emerged from underneath their hiding places. Aline dusted off her robe. Meliorn was next to her.

"We had better get moving, even if we can't hear it anymore. We don't know if it can come back. Did anyone lose anything during our escape ?"

Alec checked, he sipped his water while doing so. He had only three throwing knives left. He had refused to take Kaelie's. That had maybe been a bad decision. At least his feather-staff was still with him. They had gotten away without a scratch. Aline guided them again. Alec alternated with Lydia to see where they were going. The ghostly white face didn't resurface and neither did the lullaby singing monster. They walked in silence, in the dark mostly until they arrived at a clearing. The day was probably starting to be over and the sun would rise up soon. A light breeze made the leaves ruffle. The air was dry.

They decided to take another break at the edge of the clearing. It gave them an escape route into the forest if it was needed. Lydia and Meliorn went away to gather wood. Alec hid the relief of finally sitting down. His headache was back again. The lack of sleep imposed itself on his mind. He fought the need to close his eyes by digging around the earth to make space for where their fire would be. He used a cloth to protect his hands. He didn't want to waste any water to clean his hands. An ugly and disgusting suction sound was heard once the two others were back with the needed wood. They didn't register where it was coming from at first, until something sprouted from out of the ground. The same suction and popping sound was heard again. Aline shone the witchlight onto it. It was a pumpkin. It just had grown out of the ground rapidly and was now shining in an orange light. The sound it emitted was extremely familiar for anyone who had watched the games.

Sponsor gifts.

It took some self-control not to jump on it. Everyone in the group was above that. But the giddiness of everyone lightened up the mood. Even Alec could feel excitement bloom in the pit of his stomach as they all gathered the pumpkins together. Upon the first look it was as if they were carved in with faces but it was actually with numbers 1,2 and 4. The pumpkin from district 2 was the smallest. Alec let Lydia open it.

The iridescent light that shone through the fake vegetable was a dead giveaway on what it contained. With a smile Lydia took out the witchlight. They were able to rely on two light sources now, which would make their passages through the dark less tedious and expanded their field of vision greatly. It was a gift of great use. She gave the small container that accompanied it to Alec. "This might be for you."

He looked at the container in his hands which was as big as his palm, but smaller than the witchlight. Upon opening it the smell was unmistakably an indicator on what kind of medicine it was. "It's for us," He rectified. He scooped up the cream with his finger. The wound salve sizzled on his skin when he rubbed it on the cuts and bites of the spiders above his eyebrows; the one that had hurt the most; It stung and foamed. But when he wiped it off he could feel how it had closed up the wound as if it was now a childhood scar. It was an expensive gift and highly invaluable. With this and the syringes they could now fully heal if one of them got mortally injured. He closed the container.

"It will help you heal the cut on your lip, but someone else needs to apply it. Because you really don't want to swallow this." He had chosen his words carefully and gestured to Aline to show he wanted to share this gift with her. They were allies. This was a perk of being his ally.

The understanding was mutual. "Well, do you like fish ? Because I have these." She held something in her hand. It looked like a roll of something. Alec extended his hand, sealing the deal between them by doing so. She laid out the strangely shaped food in his hands. It smelled indeed like fish. But it was cold. It also had rice around it. He popped the thing into his mouth. It had a strange texture and somewhere his mouth was extremely grateful to have something other than sweets in it. The soup they had drank the first day had been on Alec's mind for a while now. The fish tasted good, if not weird. He wasn't sure if it would fill until he swallowed it down. The best part, Aline showed there was more where that came from.

"What did you get Meliorn ?" Lydia asked as she gave the witchlight to Aline for her to compare them. They were identical in shape and size.

"Well, let's say that Alicante has a sense of humour." Lydia scoffed, so did Aline. Alec frowned. The thing Meliorn was waving around was elegant, graceful and certainly pretty to look at. But completely useless. Meliorn dangled the hand mirror upside down. Meliorn had a sly smile on his lips.

"Is it just an ordinary mirror ?" Alec asked. The craftsmanship looked expensive so there had to be a useful purpose for it. There hadn't been any games ever where a sponsor gift was just there for vanity.

"See for yourself." Meliorn turned it around and for the first time since they entered the arena they all had a look at themselves. Alec wanted it put away instantly. He wasn't sure he wanted to gaze upon himself. "But nobody needs a mirror to know you're pretty handsome, Lightwood."

Alec's eyes shot open at the openly flirty line that had just been delivered. He was only temporarily speechless. Lydia snorted. "Don't be ridiculous," he said dryly. Meliorn was merely diverting his attention to make sure he wasn't the receiver of petty comments. In the end Meliorn was the one who had gotten the mirror, not Alec. He waved off the mirror, embarrassed. At least he didn't blush. He didn't want to touch the thing and absolutely hated to be put on the spot. So to distract the group from making any more comments he decided to be practical: healing, resting and drawing another map. He started talking strategy and ideas. They definitely needed another plan of attack and preferably one that was fail proof before the day was over.


	19. Chapter 9 Day 4

" _What is amazing about this arena ? Well I must say it has an aesthetic I haven't often explored. I've often prized myself on trying to execute a different style every time I bring the games to you. I'm particularly fond of the creatures we've created for this one. They all have a personal touch that I think will entertain greatly. We've also tailored some of them based on the tributes' greatest and deepest fears, which is a very different approach than usual. I also wanted to move away from the pastel colours of last year. I wanted something that reminded me of certain forgotten tales and mysteries, which is why I've added another dimension to the arena this year. One that would qualify as a game inside of a game."_

– _Magnus Bane, Head gamemaker, Alicante Today_

* * *

A fog had risen for a few hours now. It was thick and it annoyed every single one of them. The newly acquired witchlight was rendered useless by it. It was hard to track anything down in this weather, even with their goggles. They had found a trail leading them to an unexplored side of the arena. There was no sign of any of the mutations tonight. It was eerily quiet. Alec was reminded of the quarries of district 2. Often fog would descend upon the area. When it intermixed with the dust of adamas it would render suffocation easy and breathing became painful when you were exposed to it in the long run. Lydia was clearly on the same train of thoughts. The way she walked was tense and on edge. Even her breathing wasn't as focused as usual. She didn't like quarries either and rightfully so. Alec wondered if she was thinking of John because his mind trailed back to Max, to the accident, the dust-filled fog that hadn't left the area for weeks on end in its aftermath. He wondered how his brother was doing.

There was another house up ahead. It was surrounded by the fog. There was a light visible from the outside on the upper floor. Alec felt the tendrils of tiredness weighing heavy on his head. It felt as if his skull was stuffed with cotton. His limbs felt sore. Yet again he hadn't slept well. He had taken two watch turns. Every time he closed his eyes he was afraid he wouldn't be fast enough, reacting enough, aware enough. It reminded him of the one whole week they had been trained to stay awake for, at the institute. The mission was to be patrolling the city in active rotation shifts. It was a test to see who was able to stay awake the longest without breaking. Most people weren't able to get through the third day. Alec had crashed on day four. Even though he had now slept more than during training, his thoughts wandered toward how long it would take before he started seeing things again.

He heard Aline and Lydia talk about ambushing and Alec felt like he couldn't care less. He scratched the underside of his chin. They settled on a plan to trap the door, preventing any escape. They had shovels. It wouldn't take too long for them to dig an uneven path that could make the tribute or tributes residing in the house trip if it tried to escape through the door. Alec volunteered to guard the outside. The night vision goggles cancelled out enough of the fog so Aline tossed them to him.

When the door opened it made a creaking sound that was anything but discreet. A gush of cold air made Alec rub over his arms. His head was suddenly more painful than before. He really didn't like low temperatures. It just made his headaches worse. He positioned himself next to the door when his allies made their way in. He would have leaned against the wall weren't it for the just as cold surface it embodied. Alec shook his head. He would drink if he didn't have to keep his focus.

There was silence. He couldn't hear anything from the inside. The light wasn't coming from the ground floor and soon Alec was bathed in the dark. He put on the goggles to keep a decent field of vision. The moon was looming and huge. He hadn't had the chance to take a look at it until now. He wondered how far the fog extended, if it was the whole area or just this part of the arena. A sudden movement at the border of the trees caught his attention. There was something lurking there.

Alec quenched his curiosity. At best it was an animal, even if they had yet to encounter any wildlife; or another tribute that was wandering about the house. The worst would be a mutt. In any case he shouldn't get distracted. He reinforced his grip on his feather-staff. He exhaled. His head throbbed but his senses were on alert. It didn't come closer and there was no more movement. Just eerie silence. Maybe he was indeed starting to see things.

"Alec," he almost hit Lydia as she appeared in the doorway. He pursed his lips, keeping down the instinct to yell at her. "There is no one up here. What's wrong ?" She asked, probably startled by his expression.

"Nothing, I thought I saw something." Lydia frowned. "It doesn't matter." He brushed it off, a bit annoyed that she had been able to sneak up on him.

"A tribute ?" She insisted. He took off the goggles and made his way in the house. 'I said it doesn't matter' he muttered from between his teeth. He wanted to get it over with. He walked inside. Lydia scouted the environment. To say the house was cold was an understatement: It was freezing. When Alec exhaled he could see the condensation of his breath.

The ground floor was different compared to the other two houses. It was one empty room and a staircase. The light from upstairs was enough for Alec to navigate. Lydia joined him shortly with a witchlight, she affirmed there was nothing outside.

The layout was reversed. Downstairs was now the empty room while upstairs was accommodated with furniture. Meliorn was warming himself up at the lit fireplace. There were remains of an encampment. A broken pumpkin that still had remains of food and such. There was even a quilt laid out on the floor. Aline was inspecting it. Nothing gave away how many tributes had been residing here. Alec noticed there were no actual windows. He shivered, it was really cold in here.

"Anything ?" He asked Aline, who shook her head.

"There is no way of telling how long since the tribute was here. The footprints you leave on the floor seem to freeze over quite quickly. But since the quilt is still a bit warm I would think it was just a few minutes before we arrived. I can also confidently say it's just one tribute." Alec looked around. "The food, it's not enough for one person. Next, I can't imagine how a group of people would agree to stay in this kind of environment for long."

"The fog seems to dissipate at this height." Lydia had walked toward the window opening and looked outside. "I can see the trees clearly from here."

The axe which flew by came as a total surprise. For a moment Alec thought that Aline got dismembered. Her scream was visceral. Tears broke down her cheeks. Lydia was taken hostage. An axe was pulled close to her throat, threatening her. Alec stared down at the tribute of district 10. Her hair was pulled in several braids and there was a mean cut at the height of her eyebrow and cheek.

"Nobody moves," Alec ordered. Meliorn had come to Aline's aid who was sobbing. Lydia was staying stiff. But she wasn't alarmed.

"Alec, we need to use a syringe. She is losing a lot of blood." Meliorn sounded calm above Aline's sobbing. Alec had to be careful. Aline might already be dead. He didn't want to lose Lydia too.

Alec didn't stop looking at their attacker when he answered. He didn't want to even look wavered. "Leave it in there. Don't remove it." He could physically hear Meliorn objecting to his order. Nevertheless he listened to Alec.

"What do you want ?" He asked. Aline probably passed out since he couldn't hear her anymore.

"Safe passage. You give me my belongings, you give me medical equipment and…" The tribute didn't smile and gave a pointed look that she wouldn't hesitate to slice open Lydia's throat. "She lives."

"You have my word." Alec broke their stare down. Found a backpack and started to stuff everything he was seeing around. He tried not to look at Aline. Her blood was soaking the floor. He was glad to see that only half of the medical box was in Meliorn's bag. He discreetly left the medical syringe in. He half folded the quilt. The bag looked like it was ready to burst.

"You're going to come with me and give me the bag once we're out. You first." Alec put down his feather-staff to not appear threatening. He was hardly disarmed, but he wanted to show his cooperation. He really didn't like the idea of leaving the room with Aline injured and losing blood. But one glance at Meliorn reassured him that she wasn't going to be left alone.

"There were no axes at the cornucopia. Were those gifts ?" Once they were downstairs she circled him. He extended the newly made up bag at the tribute. She snatched the backpack from his hands quickly enough that Lydia was unable to make any move to liberate herself. She moved closer to the door.

"The Huntress doesn't always throw her axes accurately." Alec realised that with the amount of axes the tribute was carrying, it meant she had been able to survive prolonged exposure to the mutation. It was an impressive feat.

"There is something in the dark, lurking. It will only attack if you're in the woods alone." She exchanged this information willingly. He let the surprise show on his face. He hadn't expected her to do this. There was hardly a possibility for an alliance between them. She had always felt like a lone agent. She was Cleophas' trainee after all.

"We trapped the entrance door. Be careful where you put your feet." Lydia groaned disapprovingly. Alec ignored it. The tribute from 10 nodded in appreciation.

"Until we meet again." She shoved Lydia hard against Alec who caught her before they would both fall on the floor.

Lydia got back on her balance as quickly as possible. Alec grabbed her wrist to prevent her from using the unsheathed throwing knife. The tribute from 10 disappeared into the mist.

"Don't," Lydia looked at him as if she was personally offended by his interception. "I gave my word." He explained. Lydia pursed her lips together as if she had eaten something sour. But she relaxed. She was from 2 like him, even if deeds were stronger than words, if you promised something you had better live up to it.

A metallic of grinding metal resonated through the arena, startling them both. It didn't sound like the death tribute canon. Unless they had changed the sound of it. Aline. They had to go back to Aline. They ran back up the stairs. Meliorn was using torn pieces of robe to apply a tourniquet to Aline's arm. He had left the axe in her limb as Alec had instructed. The blood was seeping everywhere. Its smell was invading the whole room. Her limb didn't feel cold yet even if the room did. There was so much blood, so damn much.

"It's not her," Meliorn answered his 'is she dead ?' question as quickly as possible. They all crouched around Aline. They had to act fast or she was going to actually die.

"Listen, we're going to remove it, the axe. At that very moment we're going to need to inject her with the syringe. We need to keep her from losing more blood. Lydia, put pressure on it."

Lydia gave him the syringe. He inhaled. He wasn't very focused and his hands were trembling slightly. He uncapped it. He let a small prayer out. This had better work. This had better, angels be damned, work. Meliorn kept Aline's pulse in check. They all shared a glance. Meliorn counted down and removed the axe. The blood was so warm in contrast to the room. Alec pushed the syringe against Aline's skin. The medical nanites sprung free and enveloped her whole limb.

"Come on." Alec felt himself grit the words repeatedly against his teeth. His heart was racing. He felt restless and unable to focus on anything else. Aline had saved his ass more than once. She didn't deserve to die like this. Not because they had been ambushed from a rooftop. She deserved to die in battle. Like all of them. It was unfair if this was her way to go. He wasn't going to cry but he felt his heart being torn at the unfairness of it all. This is not how it should have happened. He should have been the one checking the windows. He should have been the one checking out the roof.

It took a few minutes until finally the cloud of nanites dissipated. The wound was closed. Aline had stopped breathing. Nobody dared to move. They waited, waited to see if things were changing, waited for her body to either grow colder or for Aline jolt awake. It took time; it took minutes;

But in the end, there was no sound of the canon to be heard.


	20. Chapter 9 Day 5

They took many breaks. Enough for Aline to catch her breath and gather strength. The blood loss had been significant but thanks to the nanites the wound had closed completely, even removed a smaller wound Aline had been sporting since the bloodbath. Dawn was breaking. They had decided to explore another area in the arena, maybe even go back to one of the houses they previously explored. They had understood that every house had its own flavour, its own peculiarity that made it unique and toward which every tribute had chances to be attracted.

The place they were exploring had high grass and more rubble and stones; trees were rare. It wasn't all that easy to navigate but they were doing fine. Alec hadn't slept again. Every step he took made him want to keel over. He was hurting. His robe felt stiff and unpleasant to walk in. He almost couldn't lift his weapon. He was ready to crumble into pieces.

He had been thinking of Kaelie, her face was everywhere when he closed his eyes. The skin of his hands itched underneath his skin but he couldn't find the reason why. He was too tired to find the reason why.

Lydia was quiet, more so than usual; she was also more at the back of the group. It was as if she was avoiding Alec. He tried not to make anything of it. But he couldn't read if she was angry at him or not. She deflected anything he had to say and had sharp remarks about almost everything he asked about. She conversed with Aline from time to time and sometimes with Meliorn. But not Alec.

He didn't want to doubt her. He trusted Lydia with his life. However, if she had changed her mind he had to know. Which is why he cornered her. Normally he would have let it slide. Normally he didn't even care what people thought of him, or if they had an issue with him. But normally he wasn't in the arena either. This was a once in a lifetime situation. This was a life or death situation.

"Why are you ignoring me ?" They were keeping watch for another small break. The house was pretty close now.

"I'm angry," her heartfelt answer almost made Alec gape his mouth open in surprise. But he composed himself quickly.

"Is it something I have done ?" He asked carefully. He didn't feel insecure per se. But he hadn't been aware of any misdemeanours or anything that had been tactically out of place. Lydia was scrutinising him. When he didn't answer his own question Lydia got even more annoyed.

"You let the tribute from 10 go," she said as if it was self-evident. Alec knew better than to shrug her argument away.

"We'll get her next time." He tried not to sound arrogant as he said it. She was a formidable opponent and she had been able to outsmart the Huntress to get more of these throwing axes. She was resilient and strong. She deserved admiration. He looked forward to fighting her.

"Next time one of us might be dead." The sentence was laced in bitterness. But the matter-of-fact tone made Alec stop in his train of thoughts. She put doubt in his mind. Had he indeed made the right decision to let the tribute run ? Had he been reckless ? Too arrogant ?

"Any second we spend in this arena, is a second closer to us dying," he retorted. Had he made a mistake ? No. He couldn't have. He had given his word. He would stand by it. He crossed his arms over his chest "I won't lose myself Lydia." It wouldn't have felt right to stab the tribute from 10 in the back. This wasn't his way of doing things. He absentmindedly rubbed over his healed carved marks. The one on his ribs was almost completely closed up now. Now it was just a reminder of the pain he had endured. It was silent between them for a bit.

"You're right," Lydia sighed. Her shoulders slumped a bit. She wouldn't have let anyone look at her this way if it hadn't been just the two of them. "It's just… there are so many of us left. The Mckenzie girl looks like she lost her mind and 10 looks lethal. I mean, we haven't seen the girl from 3. What if she is pulling the same stunt as Jocelyn Fairchild ? Appear desperate and weak. Hide herself during most of the games before killing the primary alliance all on her own ?" The question was genuinely laced with concern.

"I don't think she'll pose a huge threat." Now he sounded arrogant. But the way the tribute from 3 had behaved hadn't given anything away that she would secretly be a killer. She had been smart to hide from them for now but Alec didn't believe she was an actual threat.

"I really want to believe you, Alec." Alec would have reached out to her, put his hand on her shoulder. But he knew she would have hated it so he refrained from doing it.

"Trust me," he smirked. His gut feelings about the people around them hadn't been wrong so far. "It's going to be alright."

Lydia nodded. Alec wasn't sure if she believed him or if it meant her anger had been doused out. Lydia had in the end not been very vocal about any fears or insecurities. Not since they had their talk on the couch on that first night after the reaping.

They turned around to join the group again. Aline stood up from the rock she had been sitting on. She hadn't been looking well. "We're close to the house, I hate saying this but I need proper sleep." They all needed their strength if they were to encounter someone else to fight or flee from, so they agreed to adhere to her request.

"I wouldn't have wagered you for someone who would admit when situations and bodily conditions aren't in their favour and would impede a mission." Said Alec. He didn't mean it as an attack. Just an observation. He readjusted his feather-staff on his back.

"My mother would have called it a weakness," Aline looked at him, as if she was hesitating. "Helen taught me it is a strength."

Alec stopped in his track. His eyes did not look away. He found himself unable to formulate a response. He was at a loss for words. He had understood. He didn't need more words. Her tone of voice hadn't wavered.

"Helen ?" Lydia was the one asking the question, because they often forgot. The ones who didn't make it were often forgotten. Alec didn't feel at ease.

"Helen Blackthorn," Meliorn answered, breaking the heavy silence. "The sister of Mark Blackthorn."

Alec averted his eyes. He wouldn't have been able to handle Aline's facial expression. Lydia shifted from one foot to another, probably regretting that she even asked.

"She was my fiancée," Aline continued. "We would have gotten married this year." Alec felt embarrassment, guilt, creep up on him. However, he kept his eyes on Lydia. They both had similar stories. How would his companion from 2 react ? Was she going to apologise ? Or was she going to shoot a defensive move ?

"She was reaped, nobody else volunteered and I was too much of a coward to step up. Now she is dead."

Alec trailed his eyes back to the environment around them. He wasn't trying to ignore the conversation because it was important. It was mostly because he felt like he was intruding. He really wasn't good with this kind of emotions. He really wasn't good with them.

"Usually it's glory and victory that brings one to the games. Sometimes it's losses, but sometimes it's a need for redemption." Lydia's words seemed to hit home.

"More than you know." Aline smiled in response. It was an unspoken gesture of respect and understanding.

Alec looked at Lydia. He remembered her pain, the way she talked of John, the way she talked about wanting to win and be a victor of the games for herself because of a promise. How she had maybe cried a little bit on his shoulder. Just enough to bind her to him. Just enough to seal the deal between them. His mind trailed toward his own family. He was here for them. He was here for the Lightwood name. He was here because he would finally be able to clear his family name. He was here for a redemption that was completely different from either of theirs. He almost would have felt shame for it if it weren't for the games. They all wanted to be able to make their own choices and live a life they had chosen to live. They all wanted to be free.

"Not to interrupt this touching moment, but I'm certain we can have a longer talk once we have set up camp and we're out of range of any possible surprise attacks."

Meliorn broke the silence, and everybody was thankful for it. The tension had become uncomfortable, uncomfortable for Alec at least. He was glad Meliorn gave them a way to close this off. Aline squeezed Meliorn's shoulder in thankfulness and took the lead.

She guided them forth. It was less exhausting to be walking in the daylight. The house was on a higher end. The ground elevated slightly. It was huge and it only consisted of one room. The ceilings were high and you couldn't even distinguish the beams because there wasn't enough light that went high enough. They all hoped there wouldn't be any creatures hiding in the dark. Meliorn had enough energy to gather the wood for the fireplace when the sunset would come. Alec divided the newly arrived sponsor gifts equally. It was mostly food. They had also gotten another small shovel. Which had raised many questions between them. There was a joke that they perhaps had to dig their own graves. It had made Alec roll his eyes.

Aline fell asleep almost instantly after having eaten. She probably needed one more day before being fully healed. They hadn't gotten any extra medicine nor equipment when the new gifts arrived; there was still no bow. Alec tried not to be disappointed. He had checked and tried but the wood wasn't bendable enough for him to make an improvised bow and of course they didn't have a type of cord he could make or use for it. He still had a feather-staff, he wasn't in real _need_ for him to have a bow. But it would have been convenient. The fact he hadn't been sponsored for a weapon started to taste sour in his mouth. He still had to prove himself.

He rested against the wall. There was still a lot of light outside. It felt safer to sleep during the day. The Huntress had yet to come out to hunt during those short daylight hours. Alec looked at the ceiling. His eyes felt like they were on fire - in need of rest - he drank from his bottle. He really hoped there wasn't another spider hidden in the darkness of the ceiling. Because that would definitely forfeit any possible slumber.

"You should sleep." He looked at Lydia who was securing the few windows they could access from where they were.

"I am not tired." He wasn't. He was exhausted. But he was unable to sleep. He had been unable to sleep for days now.

"Maybe it's time for you to allow yourself to feel tired." He frowned and shrugged. He didn't want to. Someone had to keep watch. Someone had to take care of things.

"Alec…" The way she phrased it was a lot like a scolding. "Go and sleep. We got this."

He smirked up at her. He wanted to contradict her. He wanted to tell her no. But his joints ached; his muscles were crying out; his head was heavy. He was in pain.

"Fine," he gritted between his teeth, "but not too long."

When he closed his eyes he was done for. Of course he didn't know for how long. Of course there were at least quite some hours where he failed to keep up a light sleep and when he finally did : it was surprisingly dreamless. When he started to come back into consciousness he felt surprisingly weightless. It was as if he was floating gradually… and literally ?

He opened his eyes to see himself and his face a good ten centimetres from the ground. He jolted and his state of weightlessness got confirmed. He almost body slammed himself into the wall. He was about to talk until he heard the conversation of his allies going back and forth above his head. They were laughing. He turned around. The small windows that had been near the floor, had morphed into tall windows that spread over almost the entire length of the wall, and they let in most of the moonlight. The night had fallen on the arena once more. The fireplace lit up most of the dark around him. But the floating witchlights were the ones illuminating the darkest spaces around the ceiling. He didn't understand exactly how or what was happening.

"Catch !"

Meliorn tried to catch the candy with his mouth that Lydia had just thrown at him. His hair was floating as if it was underwater. "Anti-gravity, huh ?" He muttered to himself. He didn't feel the blood rush toward his head as he completely clumsily found himself upside down. All of their material was floating as well. He secured a backpack that was about to fall open.

"Hey Alec, join us !" Lydia was waving at him. He unfastened his feather-staff. It impeded his movements. He felt a bit out of sorts on how to navigate in this gravity-less environment. But he got the hang of it quickly enough for him to not feel embarrassed. It was strange. He had never experienced something like this. He felt a bit of excitement prickle down his spine, maybe even through his fingers. His allies were a bit far up, almost completely at the ceiling.

It was effortless to get to them. He discarded his robe. It felt nicer to move without. Aline was turning around in circles. She was upside down. "It happened a few minutes ago." She said. Her smile was the brightest it had been in days.

Lydia was grabbing another sweet from her trousers. "Here, catch !" Driven by a sense of playfulness Alec opened his mouth and fished after the green star-shaped candy. The communal cheer when he caught it was loud. It made his stomach flutter. Then he did something he hadn't done in days: he smiled. He couldn't have kept it in even if he wanted to. It was a genuine smile that was mirrored by both Meliorn and Lydia. They continued their silly game again and again, another high five, another cheer. Alec couldn't remember when the last time had been when he had been able to relax. His worries faded away little by little. He knew he should be worried of the gamemakers making them slam down and break their bones. He knew he shouldn't let himself slide into comfort. But right now he didn't care. Right now, just for a few minutes, he wanted to be able to forget and let loose.


	21. Chapter 9 Day 6

Alec felt better, more rested. His head felt less as if it had been covered by a shroud. His focus felt refreshed. It was as if he had newly awakened. A good night's sleep had helped tremendously. His head hadn't been this clear for a while now. The spirit of the whole group had risen as well. Everybody talked more, smiled more. The gamemakers hadn't changed their minds and all the tributes had eventually made it safely back to the ground without having slammed into it. For the first time since the start of the games they had felt safety. Alec had relished in it. Because he knew very well that this might have been the last time for him to ever feel this way again. They rested as much as they could until they all felt ready to go outside and face their duties once more.

The sky was clear. Alec had taken the lead. They had one more part of the arena still left to explore. There probably was a fifth house. The cornucopia was in the middle of the arena with the five houses that surrounded it. They all had their specialities : one crumbled, the other became lava, one became too cold to live in and the last one they knew of was the one with zero gravity. Lydia had been saying on how curious she was to find out about the last remaining house, while Alec wondered when they would pick up the trail of another tribute. They were maybe a few hours of walking away before reaching their destination. Right now they hadn't encountered anything or anyone yet.

"We have yet to talk about the metallic sound we heard when we encountered the tribute from 10," said Meliorn, as he drank from his bottle. He had reattached his hair into a braid.

"I wouldn't know what it is. I can't remember a game having had a similar sort of signal going off." Alec looked at Aline when he said it. She had been studying arenas as well. They all had; but they all knew that having a mother as a mentor also meant that Aline might know more. It brushed his mind that it couldn't be easy to be the daughter of Jia Penhallow. It brought so many expectations with it. To try and live up to certain expectations was something Alec knew all too well.

"I can't recall anything my mother said or could have said about it, for all we know it might not be the gamemakers but the other tributes making it." Her voice trailed off and a frown appeared on her face. She took the witchlight from Alec's hand. She almost pushed him aside. "And maybe it has something to do with this." Everyone turned to look at where she was pointing.

There was an irregularity in the ground. It was hard to spot in the dark. But once pointed out you couldn't miss it. It was a thick dark blue or maybe brown cable. It drew them all in like flies to sugar. Alec crouched to inspect it. It was as thick as his hand and unmovable. It was as if it was glued to the ground. He heard the others talk but his focus was settled on their find. He asked Meliorn for the goggles. Curiosity drove him to keep his eyes solely on the cable. Where would it lead ? What new thing was going to unfold ? If it was another trick of the gamemakers, they would be ready to face it.

They followed it, which wasn't easy because sometimes it went under trees and roots, through bushes and sometimes it went under the ground. Alec speculated that they had always been there but they had never bothered to look. How could they have been so oblivious ? The tracking of the cable was challenging. It was definitely starting to get tedious once they were deeper in the forest and the moonlight couldn't reach them as well anymore.

It disappeared from view again and they lost quite some time trying to find it again. Lydia had shouted victory into the night when she was able to track it once more. A few meters later the cable disappeared into the ground but this time it went vertically inside the earth.

Lydia had already been digging with her hands to feel how far down it was going. Alec helped as much as he could. His mind trailed over the hope that no bad surprises would be awaiting him the further they dug. Hopefully it was just a harmless object that needed to be unearthed.

"There is something there." They were already elbows deep in the hole. It didn't take long for Alec to feel it too. It was hard under his fingers. He couldn't distinguish what it was yet. It wasn't easy to stay crouched in the dirt even when he was resting on his two knees. The strain in his muscles was quickly felt. He sighed and extracted his arm. He stretched his wrist before taking off his robe which was making him sweat, and intermixed with the dirt it smelled horrible. They were all looking curiously at the small hole Lydia and he had made. It wasn't safe enough to try and shine the witchlight in it. They could lose it by accident and no one wanted to take this risk just yet.

"It's bigger than I thought." She was still digging around the hole. "Should we use the shovels ?" Lydia asked Alec for confirmation. Alec raised an eyebrow, surprised that she was asking him permission of some sort. But he agreed and everyone but Meliorn complied. The tribute from 1 choose to keep watch as the others started to work. It tired them all out quite heavily. They even decided to set up camp next to whatever it was that needed to be dug up. They rotated their tasks: one would keep the fire running and the other two dug while one was keeping watch. It took perhaps a few hours before Aline's shovel finally scraped the metal in ways that made everyone cringe because of the sound.

"Finally. " Alec made quick work of digging more of the earth loose around it. It felt warm. Aline gave a witchlight to illuminate. Alec had a hard time discerning anything, but he could see the outline of something. It felt smooth. It was different from the metal; slightly elevated. He then inadvertently pushed down the circular button. The earth rumbled and he jumped a few steps back in surprise. That didn't sound right, nor reassuring. He was reminded of the sound of the tribute launching tube. He bit the inside of his cheek to stay focused. A big metal box started to rise from the ground.

"By the angels and demons above… what is that ?" Lydia's question echoed Alec's. The metal box had several buttons, cables, and gears. It came to midriff height and it blew away steam when it 'clicked' in place. Alec had never seen anything alike. There were a few red lights flickering in its midst. It didn't look safe. It looked like a trap made to explode in their faces at any moment.

"It looks like an old generator," Aline ghosted her hand over it as she inspected it. "We had a few of those in the boatmaking factory district. But I wouldn't know how they work."

It pretty much looked the same from all angles. It had loose cables and handles every so often. Alec gave it a little push. It was as if it was completely rooted into the levelled platform. No matter what strength they'd use, it would be unmovable.

"It's supposed to make sound. The ones I saw in 4 were making more noise than this. I think it's turned off or broken ?" Lydia pulled on a handle and a metal creaking sound resonated through the air. Some steam exited the weird engine. Alec frowned. He didn't like this one bit. Lydia then experimentally pushed the handle back up. The metal creaking sound stopped immediately.

"I have no idea what I just did." She said and she took a few steps back to study the generator. Alec saw Aline pulling another lever. The sound started again to resonate through the air. They all looked at each other. Curiosity took over and Alec dared to pull a lever on the right side of the engine. The sound started to go louder. Ah. Maybe they were on to something. He pointed to the other side, gesturing to Aline to pull another lever. But when she did the whole engine stopped making noise all together. It blew steam and made the sound of a shut down.

"It's probably a puzzle." Alec raised an eyebrow at Lydia's comment. He didn't like riddles… nor puzzles. This whole thing looked like a distraction.

"If it is… Then gamemakers have a badly placed sense of humour," said Aline sourly. Alec agreed. He felt wary but he couldn't deny he was at the very least a little bit intrigued. He couldn't remember any of the previous Games to be interwoven with this kind of element before. Lydia proceeded to try out different combinations. Several of them made the engine either shut down or blow steam. Alec tried doing things at random like she was and it worked from time to time however, after Alec had made it shut down for the third time, she asked him not to touch anything anymore. He shrugged and decided he was probably a better help with setting up camp.

"You look more rested." Alec looked up at Meliorn as he put more wood into the fire. The goggles were firmly pressed against his face. He was munching on a piece of candy.

"I am," Alec replied. He didn't know how to strike the conversation further. He and Meliorn hadn't really talked unless it was small talk. Now that they had the chance, Alec didn't know what to say. Meliorn didn't so look good. He was far from the glamorous seducer he had shown himself to be. There was a scar forming on the left side of his cheek. It barred away his facial tattoo. His arms were roughed up and the stubble of his beard was starting to darken his face. Despite all that however, Meliorn radiated serenity. He didn't look tense or on edge at times. He looked peaceful even.

Alec was surprised at how calm Meliorn could be in moments of crisis. The dexterity and tact Meliorn had shown these past few days had unveiled Meliorn's calm and caring if not sometimes sarcastic nature. He wasn't as much of a trickster as he had presented himself to be. Nothing seemed to perturb Meliorn enough for him to break down or think unclearly. Even when Alec had… Even when he…

"Meliorn…" Alec tried. The urge to talk made Alec purse his lips. Kaelie and Meliorn had been close friends. Or at least had behaved that way. Alec shut his mouth, he felt his skin prickle and tension in his belly rise. He even had goosebumps forming on his forearms. A shiver ran down his spine. He regretted he even wanted to bring up the subject. It had been a good decision. So why was he feeling this surge of panic ?

"Kaelie had it coming, she has always been a bit reckless." Meliorn lowered the goggles from his face as he talked. The look in his eyes was unreadable to Alec. But Meliorn didn't look angry or sad. "This is the games of hunger. We are all supposed to meet our end in one way or another. I could invent a story here and there about a lost love. But there isn't. I'm here of my own volition. I'm here to seek strength and courage. I'm here to taste something else than the misery. I'm here to find something more." Meliorn smiled and Alec saw a flash of something in his eyes. Something he couldn't really pinpoint. Something that made Alec have goosebumps but in a whole other way. Meliorn had never felt so sincere before.

"You know, Alec, you and I are not so different." The smirk that suddenly adorned Meliorn's lips made Alec frown slightly. "I just happen to have more charm than you." Alec's eyes widened, but he kept in a sigh of exasperation and just rolled his eyes. Meliorn knew how to change the subject and sometimes he did so in an irritating manner. He let it slide. He wasn't the kind to retort to this kind of bait. It wasn't worth it.

"Maybe we need to repair it, it would explain why we got toolboxes from the cornucopia," Aline commented in the background. Lydia pushed another button and everything shut down again. In frustration she kicked the generator with the ball of her foot and cursed between her teeth. Meliorn stood up and winked at Alec. Alec eye-rolled at him again before he got the goggles tossed into his lap.

"I think there is only one person who can help us further with this." The girls looked at Meliorn. It was the first comment he had made about the generator since the start of the evening. "We need to stop dancing around that fact. Because none of us has the kind of skill that is required." Meliorn crossed his arms, still sporting the same self-evident smirk on his face he had a few moments ago. "We need to find the tribute from district 3."


	22. Chapter 9 Day 7

" _The games are about more than survival, the primary goal for this year is to tell a story. A story of strength and valour. Our tributes will be forced to battle not only the others but also themselves in this arena. It will push them into taking time to think and to make choices based on more than why they are here. It's about who you are and the choices you make that'll make you grow and ascend to victory."_

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– Lorenzo Rey, gamemaker, CoG daily

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Her arm was hurting. A thorn bush had grazed to her arm, had made her bleed. She had mapped out the woods so she could navigate them quite quickly. But she wasn't sure she was going to be quick enough. She panted, trying to get some kind of oxygen in her lungs. She wondered if she was going to throw up before she would be able to escape. She heard the rustling sound of the steps, the shouting, the orders. She was going to get caught, trapped, killed. She needed to get away from here. Her lungs burned. Her body protested against the mere steps she took to break into a new run. She wasn't made for this. If only the trees had been good enough to climb.

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She took a sharp turn. The way would lead her into the cornfield. Maybe she could slither away from that angle, get safe. There was no time to be stealthy. She had already explored the cornfield inside and out, and found the chest hidden within. Maybe she could lose them in between the rock openings at the circular wall. Or if she was lucky she could reach the house on the other side. If it had crumbled already. It could give her cover. Her tongue felt parched from panting and the air barely making it into her lungs.

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In a way she wanted to give up. She was tired. The four hours of sleep were taking a toll on her. Her whole body trembled as she took another break. She had to lose them as fast as possible. If only she hadn't been alone. Her attention was drawn immediately to the crushed bushes on her left. There were sounds to her right. She started running again. The cornfield was finally in view. But she understood too late that she had been led here; Her body slammed against the ground and all she could see was blonde hair and dark eyes before the blow she received at the side of her head made her see stars. Her vision went black.

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She really hoped they wouldn't mutilate or violate her body before she died.

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* * *

Alec almost felt bad when he saw how Maureen, which was apparently her name, came back to consciousness. None of her pupils were blown. She probably just had a minor concussion and nothing more. It was nothing that a bit of rest wouldn't be able to fix. She didn't scream, nor did she attack. But she looked frightened. She didn't fight the rope that restrained her either. She was so young.

"Good, you're awake." He crouched next to her to be at her level. He didn't approach too close because he didn't want to appear threatening. She had every right to be wary of him. They had ambushed and chased her until exhaustion.

"Your name is Maureen, right ?" Aline asked, she was standing a bit further away and hadn't even glanced at their captive since she had eyes on the area. Her tone was pretty dismissive.

"Aren't you going to kill me ?" The genuine question made Alec frown. If they wanted to kill her they would have already done so.

"Not yet, we need your help." Her expression shifted. This had not been the most desired answer she was looking for. Her brows even turned into a scowl. Alec realised this had not been the best tactical move when any trace of fear vanished from her face.

"I don't see why I would help you." She cocked her head to the side. 'Trust no one' was the best given advice in the games and it seemed like Maureen had followed through with it. She didn't owe them her help. Since they were probably on their sixth or seventh day in the arena, she didn't owe her survival to them either. She had guts. It took courage to be fearless.

"We'll release you once it's over." He didn't want to threaten her into helping them. A road of diplomacy was easier and less messy. He didn't have the time to shift his entire focus on only her. They would inadvertently get distracted at some point and she would try to run away. He didn't have the patience to lose his time in trying to capture her again.

"Liars, I saw what you did to Kirk." She stared at Alec with an air of defiance. It strangely didn't look childish. She was fighting for her survival and she wouldn't settle for unsafe situations and empty promises.

"Listen, you get to live a little bit longer, another chance at survival, and we offer protection," He sighed, annoyed. He really didn't want to threaten. But if she insisted, she didn't leave him any choice in the matter.

"I don't want your protection, I want you all to leave me alone." She didn't look away. He admired her tenacity. Her stubbornness reminded him of Izzy. His sister wouldn't have let this go either. She wouldn't be scared and would bare her teeth at him, and Maureen was doing just that. She was bold and unapologetic.

"You're not going to tell me you actually prefer to be on your own in this arena. There are things lurking in the shadows." He tried to stay calm. Hopefully the girl would budge. Because he could feel in Aline's shift of feet that her patience was being tried right now.

"That's what the mirrors are for. But I guess you stole mine." Maureen pursed her lips. Until she understood, they all had no idea what she was talking about. "Oh wait you guys don't know ?" She suddenly sounded very confident and relaxed. She knew something they didn't; Alec noticed how it made her feel safe. A bargaining chip had just been established.

"What is it with the mirror ?" He asked. The object had been the subject of many questions since they got it. He was glad it wasn't for personal grooming like they all had thought until now.

"If I tell you, will you leave me alone ?" He raised an eyebrow at her. She knew that the wordless answer was 'no'. "It keeps that screaming face away. It freezes as if it was stopped in time once you reflect its face in it." Everybody was listening to her now. But she refused to elaborate more.

"Do you know about the generators ?" He asked after the pause. He saw Maureen smirk. She was visibly extremely happy to have this kind of upper-hand. He couldn't blame her, they were four and there had been only her on her own for a few days now. It was as if the group didn't know anything of what was happening in the arena. The assumption wasn't wrong, they were, in fact, clueless about the arena.

"Yes, you're supposed to repair them." She crossed her legs. The rope around her chest seemed uncomfortable. It was probably pinching a nerve. Alec knew if she played her cards right he might be swayed into releasing her. The numbing feeling of nerve pinches was the most irritating sensation you could have. Especially when you had Jace still fumbling around, trying his best to get a decent knot made out of the rope circling you, because he hadn't bothered practicing for the class.

"Why ?" Aline asked, Alec made sure to look around the perimeter as long as her attention was driven toward their captive.

"I don't know, they are fun and really simple ?" The way Maureen talked made Alec realise that she wouldn't budge and be cooperative unless they were both sharing some information. He had a wordless conversation with Aline for a brief second. They really had to move to bargaining if they wanted this to be successful negotiation.

"We dug one up earlier," She said. She readjusted her stance, moving a bit out of the way so Alec could have a better view of the things around them. The fire was crackling away. There wasn't anything around.

"Oh and you want me repair it for you ?" Maureen sounded surprised but the tinge of wariness shone through. She didn't trust them and rightfully so. They were all going to betray each other and kill each other at some point. Hopefully they could put it off as long as they could. But it was inevitable.

"You are correct." Aline's reply made Maureen think. She was biting her lip and seemed to stare a bit behind him. Alec wondered if she was going to refuse or if she would finally open up a space for negotiations. Which she finally did :

"Do you have food ? Anything that isn't sweets ?" Alec couldn't hide his surprise at her request. He hadn't expected that. He looked at Aline. Most of their salty foods were gifts from her district. She was the one needing to decide about this. "I'll do it if you give me something that isn't sweets." Maureen insisted.

"Agreed." Aline sounded amused, they all had enough food resources for at least two extra tributes. Maureen sighed in relief. She even smiled.

"You won't run if I untie you ?" Alec wanted to be practical. He knew Maureen wasn't bluffing when she agreed to help. She didn't seem the type of wanting to actively deceive others either. He trusted her to be honest. - Probably another mistake he was making -

Maureen nodded; Alec untied her. She rubbed her fingers, a gesture Alec was familiar with if you had been tied up for long periods of time. He was confident that it wouldn't impede her repairing skills. Maureen sat down next to the fire. There wasn't as much tension in her shoulders anymore. Her robe was the dirtiest Alec had ever seen. It was covered in earth and dirt. Alec suspected she had dug her way to the generators with her hands and arms.

"What do you like ?" Aline had opened a backpack after having given the goggles to Lydia to take over watch. Maureen had her hands on her knees. She seemed to think about the question for a bit until she answered with a smile;

"I've never had food from 4 so anything will do ?" Aline took out a small breadroll. It was probably not warm anymore but it tasted really good nevertheless. Maureen smelled it immediately, her eyes closed as if it was precious. She wasn't wrong. Alec had started to get tired of chocolates on day three.

"Can I have some water ?" Maureen looked up from her food inquisitively but still smiling. She was taking advantage of having temporary allies. Smart move. There was a silence following after her request. Nobody vocally volunteered to share their water. It took some time before Alec decided to give his own. He gestured the bottle toward her. She only took one sip before giving it back to him, which Alec silently appreciated. He wouldn't have liked it if she had claimed all his water for herself.

"Since you guys ambushed me, I left everything I had behind. Including my repair case. I hope you guys have a spare one because without it I'm afraid I won't be able to help you." She directed her question at him. Her playful smirk was still playing on her lips.

"We got it covered. You'll be able to take a look at it once we get to it." He replied. And he understood why he started to like her. She tore off a piece from the green fish shaped bread. The way she enjoyed it, the way she tried to play her cards right, it reminded him of Izzy again. His younger sister had a knack for trying to get what she wanted with controlled charm and wits. Even if Maureen was younger and looked different, it felt like Alec knew her somehow and it was dangerous.

"So tell me, where is this generator ?" she asked after finishing her food. Alec had noticed she had several wounds on her hands. She hadn't patched them up well, lots of them looked like burn wounds. He briefly considered giving her the salve they had gotten. But there wasn't a strategic reason for him to do so.

"We'll lead you to it." On Aline's order, Maureen scrambled herself up.

They escorted her wordlessly. Now being aware of the mirror's function, Alec had Maureen's mirror at the ready. It fitted just barely into one of his trousers' side pockets. The moonlight was just enough for them to navigate past the fields of high grass that would lead them to their goal. When Alec didn't have his eyes on Maureen, he had them on the perimeter. There was nothing in sight. Even the moment they got to the generator was uneventful. Maureen had walked a bit closer to all of them when they had passed some of the areas. Probably areas she had had to flee or met mutations. He let her do it. It probably made her feel safe that they were more than just her now.

Aline hovered the witchlight around. They weren't sure about making a fire but Maureen didn't seem like she needed more illumination than what she had. She even joked about having the most light for the first time in days since she dug up a generator. Lydia offered help, to which Maureen's face shifted to something serious; she didn't look remotely like the scared little girl she had been when she woke up; she looked confident and focused, ready to take on a more teaching role. Alec listened. Lydia interrupted her a few times because she would get carried away in technical babble. The main reason why Lydia had failed her own repairs was because her sequence of pulling levers wasn't timed enough and not equal with the amount of panels. You preferably pulled levers and pushed in buttons at the same time as well.

Alec made sure to illuminate them. He was crouching and soon, as the minutes passed away, he understood that this wasn't something that was going to be repaired quickly. He sat down. When his arms ached from holding up the witchlight he switched the hand he was holding it with.

Lydia asked for a break after a while. But Maureen continued. There was no break needed, she had said. So Alec didn't move either. He watched her work. She sometimes opened a panel to toy with cables to connect them. It was something about conductors. The steam the engine would sometimes release made their clothes damp but they both elected to ignore it.

"Why won't you take a break ?" He asked after a while. He noticed her movements going a bit slower sometimes and she was grimacing every now and then.

"Because if I do, I'm afraid you will kill me, now that I've explained how the generators work, you have no use for me anymore." Her face was closed off. He could hear her clouded fear and her concerns. He put the witchlight in his other hand.

"We don't know what the generators unlock. Who knows, maybe once they are all repaired, if there are more than two, something will happen. We might need your repairing skills again. Killing you now would be strategically in our disadvantage. " He knew the line was coldly delivered. He knew it wasn't reassuring. But Alec wasn't the reassuring type. These were the games of hunger. They were all playing. All were trying to win. There was no comfort here.

"Take this."

"What is it ?" She asked. He tugged the small container with the wound salve out of his pocket.

"A salve," he replied. He pried open the lid. There was still so much of it left. It wouldn't impact their resources. He extended his hand toward hers. She pulled another lever before wordlessly laying her hand in his palm. Alec had watched her fingers for a few hours now. The charred skin had tensed continuously. She winced and flinched when certain things brushed her flesh. He couldn't have ignored it and watch her be in pain any longer.

"When I didn't have any light, the generator would explode from time to time. Your friend is very lucky she wasn't blasted off, the times she has tried repairing it on her own. Without knowing what she was doing, she might have gotten severely injured." Alec tucked the witchlight under his chin and scooped up some of the salve to rub it on her burns. The initial touch made Maureen flinch. But there was no pain in the healing of the wound.

"She is lucky, but also very smart." Alec had his eyes on the hands in his as he massaged the salve into Maureen's skin. It became very sticky, like it usually did when the salve was treating burns and blisters.

"It must be nice to have friends here." Her voice was a murmur. Alec was reminded of how Kirk had ran and how Kaelie had killed him. He hadn't seen it but he knew it had been a good clean death. But that was probably not something Maureen wanted to hear. He rubbed a little bit harder on the salve. It was seeping into her skin very nicely.

"Was Kirk your friend ?" He asked after a while. Her left hand was healed now, he was busy on the other. Maureen took some time to think before she replied to him.

"Not really, but he was home." Alec felt himself nod. He understood what she meant. Anything that grounded them, reminded them of whom they were here for, was a strong incentive to keep going. It made them feel like they wouldn't lose themselves too deeply in the game of survival they were currently living through. He let her hand go.

"I'm still going to try and win. Regardless of whether you guys still outnumber me. I'll survive you all." Her threat didn't sound empty in his mind; she was serious. Even though he highly doubted she posed a real threat in combat. When it was about survival ? She had made it this far. Which meant she knew her way around the arena. She had a chance to win. She had a chance to outsmart them all.

He stopped rubbing her hand and nodded. The acknowledgement made her wink and her bold smile reminded him of Izzy again. Maureen was strong, stronger than what she had shown in her interview, stronger than what her mere score of '7' had meant. He started to like her and Alec didn't know what to do with that knowledge.

Lydia came back from her break and Alec denied Aline's offer for sleep. He wanted to keep on supervising the repairs. It didn't take long. The roaring of the engine became louder and louder. Maureen ordered them all to stand up and stand back. The ground rumbled and a high pitched metallic sound echoed in the open air. The same one they had heard back in the house when Aline had been injured.

It had worked, they had succeeded. They looked at each other, a victorious smile painted on all of their faces. But all of a sudden Alec's face was splashed with blood. Maureen fell against his chest.

An axe was protruding from her back.


	23. Chapter 9 Day 8

The blood was instant, it spurted everywhere. She screamed but her body was probably in shock so it wasn't as high pitched as it should have been. He caught her in his arms, held her against him. He felt the warmth of her, her faint crying. Alec felt every fibre of his body fray away. Fear twisted his gut. He looked up to see the aggressor. The huntress was running, another axe at the ready.

He shouted orders. 'Run' or 'disperse', he wasn't sure anymore. It was white noise in his ears.

He couldn't leave her behind.

He had to flee or fight. Another axe was thrown. He ducked. Forced himself to carry Maureen over his shoulders. She was petite and didn't weigh much, and yet more than he would have thought. Even the people in district 3 were starving. He couldn't unsheathe his feather-staff to defend himself. All he could do was run. He chose a different escape route. There was laughing, the creature's distorted laugh and a half-sung lullaby that sounded like the scraping of a machine. He knew he could only carry Maureen for a certain amount of time. Maybe enough time to hide. Maybe enough time to have a tactical advantage.

There were more axes. He didn't see his allies anywhere. The more he ran. The more he realised that this time Lydia wasn't going to save him. He ran faster. It was hard, carrying Maureen. He wasn't even sure he had a syringe in his pockets. He dodged again. His whole back was starting to hurt. The weight of Maureen was slowing him down. He arrived at the field of high grass. It was an open space and way too dangerous. The Huntress could have an open line of sight. Going further was suicide.

He had no choice. He heard the lullaby closer, coming from the forest behind him. He lowered Maureen to the ground. She was breathing shallowly. He only had time to tie his robe around her to slow the blood flow before the Huntress appeared. He stood his ground and crouched. The Huntress wasn't going for Maureen. It was going for him. It didn't prey on the weak. It preyed on whatever was moving. With a skilled movement he retracted the blades from his feather-staff. He wasn't sure the Huntress would even be bothered if he were to injure it.

His breathing got ragged instantly when he realised what he had gotten himself into. It was taller, way taller than him. Two, if not three heads taller. It smelled of blood and ashes. The axe was big enough that the blade of it would behead him instantly. He hardened his muscles; ready to block the first blow.

It almost knocked the air out of his lungs. The sheer force put behind the axe made him take a step back. The Huntress seemed unbothered and tried to hit him again. He hooked his feather-staff under the blade to redirect the blow somewhere else. It took effort. He had always been the taller one in the training room. The tables were turned now. He tried to hit her with his knees, his boots. But she didn't waver when he crushed her feet. The Huntress was practically unmovable. He parried again, spun upon himself and stuck the blades into the Huntress' thigh. He took a few steps back and retracted the blades back into the staff's handle. There was no blood, no gaping injury, no damage. Which probably meant that the body was not even made of flesh and bone. It was as if the Huntress wasn't even a living creature. The glowing eyes were looking at him. The laugh, the lullaby, it was persistent. It didn't stop. Another blow, another parry.

Alec felt as if he was facing a living nightmare. A demon, the kind of creatures it was said Valentine Morgenstern had used during the uprising. They looked human but they weren't. They looked sentient but they weren't. They had one purpose : to kill and kill again. He felt that he was getting out of it. The fear, the adrenaline, somewhere he wished he didn't hear his heart as much as he did right now. He was scared. So scared. The Huntress was looming, predatorily, strong. He tried to time his breathing as he stepped out of the way. Every time he stuck his blades in the body there was no reaction; not even a flinch. This creature wasn't human, it wasn't supposed to even exist.

" _Fairytales are interesting subjects to work with when it's about the games…"_

He felt his feather-staff almost bend when he blocked another blow. Shit. The axe was stuck in the handle of his feather-staff. There was no time to think. There was no escape anymore. And he wasn't sure his feather-staff would even resist a second blow; The dread twisted his gut. Was he going to die like this ? Killed by a mutation ? The sickening smell of the fluids that dripped down from the Huntress' mask invaded his nose. He couldn't even see the face. There were only the two glowing eyes and the ever singing lullaby.

" _My mother used to sing some lullabies or tell me stories before I fell asleep…"_

He shot his eyes into focus on the smoking, glowing eyes. The idea was a leap of faith. The Huntress tried to dislodge the axe from the handle of his feather-staff. It almost dragged Alec with it. He swallowed. His throat felt dry. He had never done this before. He had never dared to before. Hopefully it would work.

He hummed.

It sounded foreign to him. He had never sung in his life. He had never even thought of doing it either. But now he did. When the first notes resonated in his throat he almost didn't know how to position his lips. He just repeated what he had heard numerous times before. The same thing, the same lullaby the Huntress sang.

It froze, cocking its head to the side, slowly lowering its axe. Alec continued. The sound coming from his mouth would have made him cringe if he had been in different circumstances. He wasn't even sure if he was singing the right notes. He wasn't even sure that the Huntress wouldn't just retaliate. But he continued. He continued because he had nothing left to lose. He started the next line of notes and then restarted from the beginning.

There was no other reaction coming from the mutation so Alec dared to lower his feather-staff. He still felt on edge. He still felt like at any moment the illusion of calm would be broken. He couldn't see Maureen's state from where he was. He didn't know how safe it was to walk away from his engagement with the Huntress either. But he had to know. She was probably losing a lot of blood. He had to help her.

He hesitated when he took a step forward. He had to pass the Huntress if he wanted to get to her. Alec felt the glowing eyes follow him. But he continued humming. He made a beeline for it. He froze when it suddenly moved. Right when Alec had passed its sides. It lowered itself to the ground. The Huntress went on its knees, the axe pressed against its chest. It laid down onto the ground. Alec didn't dare to look away as it laid itself in fœtal position. Alec didn't dare to stop singing either. The fear was still scorching the border of his skin. He was sweating. It laid there unmoving. Alec didn't dare to reach out to touch or even to crouch to take a better look. He wanted to be sure he could break into a run if needed.

He couldn't stop his jaw from dropping in surprise when suddenly the Huntress started to turn to flakes of black ash. As if it fell asleep and was returning to the earth. In mere seconds there wasn't anything anymore, a light breeze blew most of it away in one go, accompanied by an eerie sound.

The Huntress was no more.

He didn't give himself the time to wonder. The gears in his mind kicked back to work. Maureen, she was injured. He almost stumbled trying to get to her. She was still breathing, but growing cold. Alec rummaged through his pockets emptying them one by one. Mirror, food, water. There was nothing of use. More food, a dried out piece of bread. The more he searched, the more he realised that no; he didn't have a syringe. He didn't have anything that would help a gaping wound. He took his witchlight, put it next to her face. She was starting to look pale. He exhaled, trying to keep his head cool, his panic down. This hadn't been the plan. The fact that the axe had fallen off even before they had reached the field hadn't been the plan either.

She stirred, still conscious somehow. He called her name. Her eyes looked glassy before they closed again. She had survived until now. She had deserved an equal chance. She had deserved to live. Like all of them. It stung in his eyes and on his tongue. The realisation that he didn't want Maureen to die suddenly hit him harder and harder.

Maybe there was still some time, maybe there was still a chance. Maybe if he could find the others. Maybe if a sponsor was generous enough. He felt his hands tremble. His breathing got ragged. He felt his mind muting. His skin itched. He hoisted her up on his shoulders. She was limp, like a puppet, draped on him. He started walking.

That the blood stopped flowing ? Alec didn't notice. That he was getting colder himself? Alec didn't notice either. He repeated the words in his head. He didn't want her to die. He didn't want Maureen to die. Not because she was an ally, or because she had helped them out, but because he cared. He cared too much. Even when she stopped breathing he couldn't allow himself to lie her down to be claimed by the gamemakers. Not even when the canon went off. Not even when he understood that he was on his own now.


	24. Chapter 9 Day 9-10

When the darkness of the night overlooked the arena again, everything was dead quiet. The ache next to his collarbone had mostly dulled by now. If he only remembered not to pick at it. It wasn't worth getting an infection over. The witchlight had guided him around ever since he had left Maureen behind. He hadn't waited for the gamemakers to take her away before he continued his journey. He hadn't looked back at her face either. He didn't want to see her cold dead eyes. It's only later he realised that she still had his robe wrapped around her and that she had disappeared with it. But it didn't matter, the amount of blood there had been… It would probably never have gotten clean again.

He didn't have any water anymore and even the food was scarce now. He had made his way through the high grass into another part of the forest. The trees were denser and the thorns of bushes had scraped his now bare arms more than once. He didn't use the salve to patch them up. He didn't want to.

He was feeling isolated, being on his own for the first time since he had stepped into the arena was daunting, intimidating as well. He was alone. He had kept his eyes open, refused to sleep, refused to stop. His feet were hurting and he started to feel his headache return. His body was so heavy, painful even. Then there was this invisible curtain drawn between himself and his environment. It wasn't as if he was walking in a dream per se. But it calmed down his beating heart.

As he walked, the still absence of wildlife made his skin crawl. If it wasn't for the rustling of the leaves or the breaking of the twigs he was providing, he would probably hear his own pulse. This is why he heard it, when a twig broke while he hadn't come into contact with any. Or when a bush rustled while he had just walked over a root and there was no bush near him. He was being followed. The thought made him almost stop in his tracks. He focused his breathing and listened.

It was moving quite fast, circling him. Alec didn't dare to pocket his witchlight yet. The time it would take for his eyes to adjust might give an opportunity to his follower to attack him. He unsheathed a dagger. With a bit of luck he would have the possibility to blind his attacker before striking them. He stopped walking. He was ready and alert. Whoever was coming for him was going down. He knew how to defend himself. His attacker had given him too much time to prepare for the eventual assault.

Silence

One twig broke behind him. Alec then turned around. He almost dropped his witchlight. The dislocated jaw had fallen open even more, it was rimmed with sharp teeth. The black hollow eye sockets stared back at him. He felt himself freeze. It was crouched, its robe was floating around it as if it wasn't made of real material. Alec tore his eyes away from the horrifying face to settle on the long and white knife it was carrying.

It was coming for him; knife first; with an alarming speed. Alec's survival instincts kicked in immediately. He ran. He fucking damn well ran. He held the witchlight close to his chest. There was no way he was going to be able to fight this thing. But he understood he wouldn't be able to outrun the thing either. He tried to run faster. But it was as if that ghostly nightmarish face glitched its way toward him. Like when the programs of the training rooms in the institute sometimes bugged and needed a reset. And Alec could hear it _breathe._ It was as if it had been choked.

The hairs on his neck rose. He then heard a sound that almost would have made him scream in fear. A shriek, shrilling, inhumane. His ears rung. His throat locked. He was going to die. It took one misplaced root of a tree to send him sprawling to the floor. Alec made sure to land on his side. He scrawled back, the face approached, glitched to him. He scrambled up for the mirror. It froze in place. It's jaw open and wide. The knife ready to thrust into Alec's stomach.

Alec heard himself pant raggedly. It was the only sound breaking the silence. The impact from the ground hurt. He felt his ankle burn. But he didn't actually feel the pain. Not yet at least. He would feel it later. Alec tried to relax his face but the more he looked at the frozen creature looming above him, the more he felt unsettled. It had stopped but the veil that covered its way too long arms was still moving as if it was swimming underwater. Alec sickly wondered if the creature was still conscious. He didn't dare to touch it. He didn't dare to pry open the mutation's hand to get to the knife. What if it made it move again ?

He didn't want to find out. He dared to look around. He tried to calculate how to escape the position he was in. One of the gloved hands of the creature, the one not holding the knife was extremely close to his left shoulder. It would take dexterity but he would be able to wiggle himself away from the gaping jaw without a problem if he took the right side. The challenge was not moving the mirror. Alec closed his eyes, hoping it wouldn't kill him. It didn't, so he inhaled, found his focus. He opened his eyes again. He clutched the mirror tightly against him before he tried to move. He didn't want to look away out of fear that the ghostly face would move again. He tried to slide to the right. The mirror moved slightly and Alec's fear was making him pant again. But the creature didn't move. It was still in its motionless state.

Maureen had said it. It would freeze the creature in place.

So Alec dared to move again. He made sure that the creature was looking at its reflection the whole time. Until he was almost halfway from under it. His arm was stretched. His hand trembled when he put the mirror down on the ground. The mutation didn't move at all. Unless the gamemakers wanted to change the rules very quickly, he would be able to get away from this. Alec scrambled further away, not so scared anymore that the face would suddenly move.

He refused to look at it longer than needed. He refused to examine the thing with his witchlight. Alec tried to get up. The adrenaline was dying down and he felt his ankle throb. It was probably twisted. He groaned in pain the second he put some weight on it. He inhaled again. The frustration bubbled up in his throat. He couldn't let this get him down.

Mutations were always used for a reason. Its sudden appearance meant there was another tribute nearby. He found his feather-staff that had clattered to the ground. He leaned on it. The blade of the Huntress' axe had damaged the weapon quite a lot. Too much pressure on it would break it. Alec inhaled again. It pissed him off. He knew it was irrational but he needed it, needed it to counteract his fear. Lest his mind become dull again. He checked his collar bone. His wound was open again and it stung.

No matter. Where did the gamemakers want him to go ? He looked around and decided to continue in the direction the ghostly face had chased him. It was logical. Otherwise he would have been chased a different way. He had already been walking for a while before he got eyes on where he was supposed to go. There was a glow in the distance. He pocketed his witchlight again. Let his eyes adjust. He was far away enough from the mutation to not be worried about it appearing anymore.

He approached as carefully as possible.

It was a clearing so he decided to crouch in order to not be seen, regardless of whether it hurt his ankle even more. It was one tribute; the one from 7 who had jumped out of the window when Alec had ambushed her group with Aline and Sebastian. Her name was Maia, Aline had told him. She didn't look injured. She was warming her hands on the fire she had lit against a big piece of rock. She didn't seem to be keeping watch. He wondered if she had trapped her encampment.

He observed. The longer he did, the more a nagging feeling appeared in the back of his mind. He was on his own, as was she. He was hungry and thirsty, as was she. The gamemakers had led him here. His heartbeat slowed, or hastened? He couldn't make it out. The realisation dawned on him and the veil covered his head again, muted his thoughts. He wasn't here to make allies. He wasn't here to talk. She wouldn't want to talk. She wouldn't want to be allies. He exhaled. Something was at the verge of his mind and he was trying really hard to not let his thoughts wander toward it. But the realisation couldn't be hidden from his heart. He had been led here. For one purpose, one purpose only. It made bile and panic rise in his throat.

He was supposed to kill her.

He closed his eyes. He shouldn't rule with his emotions. He shouldn't rule with his thoughts. He shouldn't let them lead him that way. He shouldn't show his weakness. He was the master of himself, a soldier, a follower of orders, of duties. He had trained for this, been built for this, lived for this. This is what he had volunteered to do. This is what he was made for. This is what he had been called to duty for, was talented for.

This was his way to glory. This was the only thing he was really capable of doing. This was where all his praise had gone to, his skills had been poured into. This is where he would become the victor they had told him to be, the one he had chosen to be. This is what he was supposed to do. This is what it had all been for. The fear, the spiders, the pain, the losses. This is what he had come here to do.

He didn't have a choice.

He unsheathed his last dagger. He cut a piece of fabric from the bottom of his T shirt, long enough to create a sling. He took a piece of candy he had been sick of eating and would never eat again out of his pocket. He shot the candy far away on the other side to attract Maia's attention. It did. When she moved, he realised that she had indeed trapped the area around the encampment. He memorised her steps. He threw another piece of candy on the other side. Maia seemed upset. She was suspicious.

Alec moved quietly to the other side. It took the third shot before Maia started to talk, asking, demanding that he would show himself. But he memorised the steps. One more distraction and he had mapped it out. He could ambush her from the rock formation. He circled her. He smashed his empty water bottle against the tree right next to him. She swore, but Alec had anticipated she would move the opposite way, to where she thought he would be.

She had her back turned. Alec attacked. He used his feather-staff to move faster with his twisted ankle. There was real satisfaction from him when he managed to set off none of the traps. She only saw him coming when he was next to her.

She grunted, growled. He rammed his staff in her sides. She intercepted and toppled them over. But he was bigger. He straddled her, punched her. Her nails and teeth dug into his skin. Her knife slashed him. There was blood. Her hands gripped his hair and he wondered if she was going to tear it off his skull; she punched him in the face; on his nose. Alec could feel the metallic taste of blood going through his nose into his mouth and throat. It hurt. His stomach was kicked by her knee. She wiggled herself from under him. He didn't let her, dragged her back on the ground with her hair. He reached for the knife. He wasn't sure where he stabbed first. But he made sure he stabbed into her heart, vital points. The faster she died the faster it was done.

It took the second stab for her to stop struggling.

The blood was in her mouth already, the gurgle in her throat was ear-splitting to him. She would die because of her heart first before she'd choke on the blood of her pierced lung. He kept his eyes open and his mouth shut. Lest the apology come to him. Lest he'd say the wrong thing. His breathing wasn't even ragged from his fight with her. Only when the canon went off did he remove himself from the body.

He held in the choked off whimper. The pain ? It felt too real. He breathed through his broken nose, buried his face in between his arms. His eyes were stinging. He was crying but no tears came. He kept himself from screaming. For the first time ever he didn't want to be here. For the first time ever he wanted to be home rather than in the arena. To be with Izzy, his friends, even his mother, to be with Jace. To be with his family. Regret tasted like poison in his mouth. The screaming, the blood, the injuries.

Because he had definitely lost himself right now. And what made it all worse? It wasn't the terrifying insectoid legs that sprouted from the earth that circled the corpse to drag it away into the earth. It was the sound of a sponsor's gift appearing from the ground. He laid his eyes on the bow and arrow, understanding that it was the only way forward. He didn't have a choice. He only had one direction. The law was hard but it was the law. It was a trial that wouldn't go forth and be accomplished any other way. It was the only way his duties to his family, his district, were truly going to be fulfilled.

If he wanted to get through this, he had no other choice than to kill himself first.


	25. Chapter 9 Day 11

The sunrise plagued his headache. Any other day it would have been a welcome sight. But not today. Alec had tracked down the others from the first house onwards. He had encountered two other repaired generators that illuminated most of the space around them when he finally picked up the trail. Whatever the purpose of those generators was, it seemed like Aline and the others wanted to find it out before the games came to an end. Which felt like a loss of time right now. Even if it was part of the games.

Alec had healed his ankle with the syringe he found in the supplies that had been left behind at the encampment. Amongst it there had also been a half drunken gourd of water. He hadn't touched it yet. As long as he didn't feel dizzy he wouldn't touch it at all. He had to play it smart and be pragmatic . With a bit of luck the gamemakers would grant them the blessing of rainfall again.

He suspected that the primary alliance pack would go explore the last remaining house, like they had planned to before being sidetracked. So when he lost sight of the trail, he headed in the general direction he knew it would be.

He kept track of his route by marking trees. Normally it wouldn't be the smartest plan because it gave away his position. But he wanted to be found. He wanted to meet the confrontation head-on.

The distinctive chatter of the others resonated for quite the mile away before Alec could even see them. The terrain was going down and the trees were leaving more space for leafless bushes. His arms got scratched by the thorns more than once. He stayed out of sight.

Aline was the one repairing the generator while Meliorn was giving the tools from the metal toolbox. She seemed to understand quite well how to connect the elements on the panel without getting her fingers burned. Lydia was using a tree as a training dummy. However, judging by the way she focused on the environment, she was still keeping a tight watch. Alec wondered if he could take them all on.

Probably not.

He readied an arrow. The click of it would have normally made him smile but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He tensed his muscles and positioned himself correctly. The sound of his bowstring stretching made him aware that they hadn't given him any wax. It didn't matter. He had 15 arrows in his quiver. In the past 3 years he had never missed a single shot. He wasn't planning on missing any of them now. It felt like a second nature, finally releasing that arrow.

Meliorn staggered back. The toolbox fell on the floor. Aline was on high alert. She ducked behind the generator. It shut down. Only Lydia stayed in open space. Alec smirked as he readied another arrow.

"I could easily kill you right now," he said. Lydia turned toward him as she put herself in a defensive stance. He saw the gears in her mind working to see if she would try to jump him to disarm him. But he was at a safe distance, she wouldn't be able to reach him from where he was.

"I'd like to see you try." She snarled. The air of defiance on her face taunted him. Alec admired her courage. It took guts to face his arrows.

"You've never deflected my arrows, Lydia." He stretched his bowstring to his anchor point. He kept an eye on Aline who visibly couldn't find an opening yet to throw him a knife.

"You've also never shot an arrow at me before." Lydia's taunt would have worked if they had been just the two of them. Alec had too many people to divide his attention toward.

"I see you guys have been busy repairing the generators." Alec commented. There was tension in the air. Lydia was still willing to talk.

"I see you have been granted a bow." Alec didn't know if she meant it mockingly. Her face was unreadable. "Did the death of the tribute of 7 finally persuade them you were worth it ?"

"We're all worth it, Lydia," he said. He lowered his bow. "I'm glad to see you are alright." Lydia lowered her staff. They walked toward each other. They gripped each other's forearm. The greeting had only ever been reserved to Jace until now.

"You know I would never fight you. At least not yet." He murmured to her. She nodded in acknowledgement. They wouldn't exchange any more words. Their physical gesture had already spoken for them.

"You shot me." Meliorn's voice was angry. Alec closed off any other emotion on his face. He didn't want to appear nonchalant. It would send the wrong message. Meliorn looked ready to unsheathe a knife and fight.

"I shot _at_ you," Alec rectified. He knew it sounded arrogant. But he believed Meliorn to know Alec better than that. "I never miss my mark, Meliorn." Meliorn stared down at him. If he really wanted to fight, Alec wouldn't have said no.

"Don't do that again." Alec kept in the shiver at Aline's cold tone of voice. She didn't sound angry. He locked eyes with her.

_She knew._

"I won't." He assured. There was no warmth in his voice. A promise. A promise of not killing anyone yet. A promise that the next time he'd attack it would be to kill. They weren't going to play around anymore. Aline would stay on guard from now on and keep an eye on him at all times and she would find him looking straight back at her. Because all of this had to end in some way or another.

"Has anyone explored the house yet ?" He asked. A change of subjects was preferable. He didn't want to linger.

They hadn't. Lydia gave a rundown on what had transpired these past few days. They hadn't encountered anyone or anything since they had split up. The gifts of food had kept coming. They also had briefly picked up the trail from Heidi Mckenzie. She was apparently cutting locks of her hair to bait them out to look for her. They had disabled a few of her traps before having lost track of her again. She was constantly and absolutely delighted to use the broken dolls that the gamemakers had given in the cornucopia. Most of her traps would have led the tributes to bleed to death. She was using the terrain way more than anyone else at this point.

Lydia decided to take care of repairing duties while Alec and Aline explored the house. They were getting low on resources and even sponsors hadn't sent any gifts of water as of late. The house was made of very small corridors. You couldn't walk with two people next to each other. Aline took the lead.

"Did you kill both of them ?" The question echoed through the small rooms. There was no furniture here. No fireplace either.

"No," Alec replied. He didn't really want to have this conversation with anyone. Not even Lydia. He didn't want his mind to dwell on it. They made it up the stairs. "Maureen had been hurt by the Huntress." He added. Aline didn't react. Alec felt his nostrils flare. Anger was showing up at the tip of his tongue. Aline had been the one wanting this conversation. She could at least react ?

"Is there a problem, Aline ? Because if there is…" he started but Aline's face made him bite back his sentence as she stopped walking and looked him straight in the eyes. His anger dropped down just as fast as it had risen in his gut.

"There isn't," Aline cut him short. But she wasn't angry. Her tone was even trying to sound soothing. "The games change you, I see it in my mother, every day of my life." The sadness that came with it made Alec frown. "You're different," she then added.

"I don't see what you're talking about," he said through his teeth. He even avoided her gaze. He didn't like what she had said. His mind tried to stay away from it, flee from it.

"You'll see, Alec." He pursed his lips. But he knew he should probably listen to her. Even if what she said had a truthful ring to it. It wasn't a truth he wanted to face.

\- Not right now. There would always be some time after. -

They made it to the back of the rooms. There was a bare wall and one big lever. They studied it. They both didn't have any response as to why it was there. And right when Alec was about to ask what they were going to do Aline pulled the lever.

Instantly a sound of steam was heard. Aline backed Alec against the wall. The steam hadn't been harmful but it had taken them by surprise. The wall next to the lever then started oozing. The stench was making it hard to breathe. A pouch of weird texture started to form. It was soundless. It discoloured the wall.

"What the-" the burst of liquid was so sudden, it was as if a boil had sprung. Aline screamed in pain as the liquid touched her skin. It sizzled through her clothing but not her skin. Alec swore under his breath. He grabbed Aline's forearm. They had to get out of here. Another patch was forming right next to them. Aline gripped his arm just as tight. The walls seemed to become smaller and hard to walk through. Another boil burst and Alec almost let go of Aline. It was scorching and the smell of fast rotting flesh invaded his nose. He could suppress a groan. That hurt. The next one burst next to his leg.

Aline was guiding them out of the narrow places. But the room suddenly transformed into a maze. They were trapped. Aline screamed again and Alec tried to shield her away from the burst. He failed. He got hurt. The liquid, it smelled awful. He wondered if he was going to vomit. He lost track of Aline. The walls were closing in. He cleared himself a way out. The walls became organic, squeezing him in.

It was getting harder and harder to breathe. Every time he elbowed the wall it bounced back, it tried to suffocate him. He didn't know how he made it downstairs by falling down. Aline was on the floor as well. The boils were numerous and a massive one was forming itself above their heads. He worked himself back up. He reached for Aline. She grabbed his hand. It took another burst for her to finally get up. Alec dragged her along. She didn't seem to walk anymore and the smell of rotting flesh became pungent. His head was dizzy, black spots danced in front of his eyes.

He started to feel numb. He couldn't stay awake anymore. His legs trembled. Aline had let go of his hand. The liquid burned. He let out a hiss before he shut his eyes. He was convulsing.

The metallic sound of a repaired generator echoed.

The walls stopped swelling. The suction sound made it feel like the walls were suddenly vacuumed back into place. There was light. He could hear swearing. His body was being dragged away outside. He couldn't move or breathe. His mind was drifting away and his body was growing heavier by the second.

He shot back up when cold water was splashed upon him and a canon went off. He gripped himself, his arms, his legs, his face. He wasn't certain whether or not he had passed out. An oozing gas was emanating from his limbs and he bit back a whimper. "What the-" His voice sounded hoarse and shaken. It hurt to talk. It hurt to move. His skin wasn't broken or rotting away. It was untouched. Lydia was looking him over with concern. She then suddenly hugged him.

He let his mouth fall open in surprise. She was hurting him but he let her, not entirely grasping what was happening. His head throbbed, and everything still smelled foul, like rotten meat.

"What happened ?" He asked again. When she broke their hug her face was hard and focused. Like he knew her to be. He frowned in concern.

"It was ichor." Alec's eyes widened and an expression of pure dread stretched his face. "Aline didn't make it. I wasn't fast enough."

His heart stopped. He checked his environment. He was out of the house. It didn't take long before he saw Aline on the ground. He scrambled up, almost failing to because his knees were too weak to let him stand up. Aline's face was motionless. Her body was cold. Her lips were blue and black veins were springing like the roots of trees from all around her eyes and mouth. Ichor had been a primary weapon during the Uprising, but also used against tributes during Lucian Graymark's games. It only could be drained away if the person was drenched in water on time.

It meant that all their water had been used. It meant that they were now lacking the most valuable resource without any results. It also meant that his friend was dead.

Panic was bubbling up his throat. His hands itched. He bit his lip as he choked back a sob. There was nothing he could do. Aline was dead.

_Dead_

Lydia sat down next to him. He knew he had to be unfeeling. That he shouldn't even be moved. That he shouldn't feel anything really. He felt sad, probably numb. He didn't understand why his hands were shaking. He didn't understand why he wasn't used to it by now. It was as if he couldn't stop himself. Like even as he tried to lock away his heart he couldn't; he couldn't let it go. Aline had saved his life, their lives, more than once. Alec suddenly felt angry. Aline had deserved to die in battle, in a fight, in a situation where she would have proven worth and glory, not like this. Not killed because of foolishness and because of misguided curiosity. Not at the hands of a gamemaker. Another tally on their list.

But nobody remembered the ones who didn't make it.

Alec _did_ and Alec _would_.

He took out the small stone from his pocket. It was still the very same one Lydia had given him on their first day here; He turned his ring like he had done the five times before that. He raked the adamas against its surface. It sparked and gleamed of heathen metal. The iridescent sound dosed Alec with a determined feeling. He lifted his shirt. The contact of the ring against his skin stung and he bit down a groan of pain. Lydia looked mesmerised. When he finished drawing on his skin, he exhaled through his nose. The pain grounded him. He reached out to turn his ring around again; he was stopped by Lydia. She shrugged off her robe.

He looked up at her questioningly. She took hold of his stone and repeated the motion, raking his 'L' against the stone. The adamas sung. She guided his hand to her collarbone. He understood. She wanted to remember too. Get focused, get strong, get what was needed to get through this. She winced, probably surprised by the pain. It did take some getting used to. He tried to draw fast but just as accurately as he had done on his ribs. The same symbol he had chosen for Aline. So she could be remembered by it. Lydia was hissing through her teeth by the time he was done with it. Her skin looked red, bleeding and burning. She thanked him and squeezed his hand. He strangely felt the need to hug her again but he didn't.

Meliorn had been watching them from afar. Alec expected him to make a comment but he didn't. He actually approached them both. He stopped right next to Aline. He bowed his head and crouched. Alec realised Meliorn was talking under his breath; something he hadn't heard before in a language he didn't know existed. It sounded like a prayer. Alec didn't know why but he felt moved. Meliorn hadn't shown much interest in his allies before. But it seemed this was his way to pay respects.

"What is this ?" Meliorn frowned as he suddenly stopped mid-sentence to put his hand against the ground. Alec then felt it too from underneath his knees. It was as if the ground was pulsing. Every time in more rapid succession. Meliorn took a few steps backwards. The ground trembled. Alec took a hold of Lydia to scramble backwards. The shaking became stronger and stronger, trees were cracking and falling down. Insectoid legs sprung from the ground again and took a hold of Aline's body. They dragged her corpse into the ground right before the earth started to tear away. The quake grew stronger and soon not even Meliorn could keep himself upright. Lines cracked into the earth all around them. Everything folded in on itself.

In the far distance something rose little by little from the earth as the sun turned red, and black clouds covered the clear blue sky. It was a gargantuan structure. Its shadow fell over all of them from miles away.

And the computerised announcement resonated through the whole arena :

" **Five tributes remaining"**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update is the before last chapter, I will be posting the final chapter and the epilogue together + end notes.


	26. Chapter 9 Day 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is our before last update, I will be posting the final chapter + epilogue + end notes together in one go. Thank you for everyone who has followed this story. 
> 
> Fanart of the last mutation of this saga was drawn by Surkefish, check out their art it’s amazing !  
> [Surkefish’s twitter](https://twitter.com/Surkefish)  
> [Surkefish’s Deviantart](https://www.deviantart.com/surk3)

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It wasn't right, the structure, the castle. It didn't look like it could actually stand upright, but somehow it did. The angles were wrong, the colours were wrong, the gravity, the physics, they were wrong, all wrong. Of course every instinct said not to approach it and yet, yet this was how it was meant to be. They were entering the final stages of the game, the last arena within the arena. They were trying to attract the tributes to come together. It was probably a reward they had unlocked by repairing the generators, a possibility to make the ascension to victory even more grand. Alec couldn't eat, his stomach was in knots. The way up the hill was strenuous, they had to use their hands and knees to get there.

The high black stone walls shone with a copper metallic reflection and were looming over them with parts that seemed to almost be floating. The closer they came to the castle, the more it rubbed Alec the wrong way. There were archways, different kinds of entrances that looked like doors. But what stopped Alec in his tracks wasn't the ornaments on the archways with creatures carrying horrible frozen smiles on their faces and stuck-out tongues. It was the stained glass, which portrayed them in various stages of the games. Uneasiness brewed in the pit of his stomach. He looked from window to window. The first stained window glass was the tributes around the cornucopia. Then the bloodbath. The murder of Bat Velasquez and Maia's escape through the window. The spider and Kaelie's execution. The tribute from district 10 battling the Huntress. Maureen digging out a generator. It went on and on. It told the tale of their games, including every detail Alec hadn't seen or been aware of until now.

Meliorn scoffed as he approached the stained glass with a depiction of him. "We look like lovers," he commented. He was pointing toward the glass depiction of him and Alec against the wall to escape the Huntress. Alec frowned but didn't comment. Because they did, in fact, look like lovers.

Alec felt like he was being watched. He couldn't pinpoint by whom or what, but it came from the upper part of the castle. It was as if someone was up there, waiting. Lydia pushed open the first door on their left. The creaking sound made Alec grit his teeth. He kept his bow at the ready as he followed Lydia inside. Meliorn shortly followed.

The interior was out of place, too rich, too pretty, too luxurious. The predominant colours were red and black. It reminded them all of Alicante. Of everything only one of them would ever have. Alec had to avert his eyes. It made him sick. The hallway was plastered with stained glass that diffused a light that bordered on the macabre. The floor was cold stone and the ceilings yet again so high you couldn't actually see the end of it. There were stairs leading up to the second floor.

Once they were in the middle of the room, the door behind them closed with a loud bang. They all jumped in surprise. Alec felt dread rise in his head when all the adjacent doors vanished. He readied his bow. Meliorn turned around with a dagger in his hand. The big door they had entered through shimmered away. But not only that. The beast's form was unfamiliar at first until Alec could isolate the shape and the appearance. A snout formed itself from out of the wall.

Little by little the wall was birthing a creature, a paw was put forward, long disproportionate legs accompanying it. A second paw broke through the flexible and swollen wall. Ears and closed eyes appeared. It looked like a cat but it wasn't. It didn't have any fur. Its body had more of a human torso than anything else. It was way bigger than any of them.

Meliorn swore and took a step back. Alec noticed panic in his ally's voice. Lydia didn't seem to move. The only way to go was to and up the stairs. Creatures and mutations were a tool, Alec repeated to himself in his head. They were an instrument of fear most of the time, unless the gamemakers wanted to get rid of a tribute as quickly as possible. Maybe Alec and the others were taking too long and they wanted to speed up the process. He swore under his breath. He really wanted to get out of there. But he didn't want to turn his back to flee.

Meliorn was commenting on the fact that they should probably run. They backed away slowly. They didn't stay for the catlike creature to open its, not two, but many slit yellow eyes. They rushed for the stairs. The roar from the creature's throat made Alec shiver and he wondered if he was going to trip and fall. Meliorn was first. Lydia was behind Alec. The floor and stairs trembled. The upstairs was another big hallway, which wasn't supposed to be possible. Was the vastness of this castle going to be the death of them? The snapping of the jaws made Alec regain his focus. The catlike creature was still pursuing them.

The tributes ran toward another flight of stairs. Alec breathed, trying to find another exit. There was none. They had nowhere to go and the stairs collapsed before they could make it to them. Another trick from the gamemakers. He felt trapped. It was terrifying. He grounded himself as he glanced behind them. The creature was running toward them on legs that weren't supposed to be able to support anything. Meliorn had already sprinted toward the many doors against the wall. None of them opened, even when he slammed his body into them. Lydia fell down.

Alec readied his bow. There was no chance in hell and heaven that he'd wouldn't try to protect her. The creature suddenly stopped, prancing its way toward its prey. Its snout and fangs opened to drool all over Lydia.

Yet again it reminded Alec of something. It was in the way the body held itself, and even the shape of the creature's head. It wasn't unfamiliar, the shade of yellow in its eyes and the way it moved.

_Chairman Meow._

The catlike creature looked like Chairman Meow.

" _It's better if you let him come to you, he doesn't like eye contact much. Especially with strangers."_

"Look away, don't look it in the eyes !" Alec shouted. Lydia was crawling back, trying but unable to actually get up. She was scared, way more scared than Alec had ever seen her. She was frantically trying to get away.

"Easy to say when it has so many!" The fear in her voice was distracting Alec. He lowered his bow. He really, really hoped Lydia would listen to him.

"Just close your eyes," he repeated. The catlike creature was almost at her level. Its roaring was still echoing through the room. "Trust me Lydia." Alec's voice sounded desperate. He knew and so terribly hoped that he was right. That this was the way Magnus had modelled this mutation. Alec inhaled. "Close your eyes," he said more firmly, clenching down his own doubts.

Alec could see the result immediately when she did. The jaws snapped shut. The eyes blinked and the catlike creature cocked its head. And just as fast, its gaze diverted towards Alec. It roared, taking a sprint. Alec quickly looked away. It pranced again and Alec closed his eyes. The mutation was still moving towards him. Alec walked backwards until he hit the wall. It approached with its snout. Alec could hear the eyes blink and his own heart race through his temples.

He jolted when the wet nose pushed against his cheek. Alec tried to stay calm. He put away his bow and reached a hand toward the creature's giant head. It started purring when Alec's hand came in contact with its dry and naked skin. He exhaled his stress out. This was an unexpected turn of events to say the least. He let his hand trail over it. He couldn't believe he was petting a giant creature that had wanted to maul them to death not even five minutes ago. He really hoped he wasn't going to poke any of the eyes or that anything would set the creature off.

The sound of a door creaking open echoed. Alec held his breath.

"I found the exit." Alec opened his eyes at Meliorn's comment. He had his eyes plastered on the floor. He neatly avoided looking at the eye on the cat's paw that was definitely staring back at him and watching his every move.

"Lydia, will you get there ?" He asked. He hoped she would be able to. It seemed impossible that they would be able to go around this creature. It was calm now. There were no indicators telling that it wouldn't snap later.

"On it," Lydia commented. He heard her crawl over the floor. It took some time. But when he heard Meliorn helping Lydia up, Alec felt some relief flooding his senses. Lydia was safe. That was all that mattered.

He lifted his hand off the cat's head. The purring didn't stop. Meliorn's voice had come from the right. He followed the hard line of the wall. The cat was right next to him. Often would push its snout against Alec and Alec wondered if he was going to get a heart attack each time it did. He was walking on a fine thread between getting shredded to death by claws and fangs, and staying alive.

It then suddenly snarled and Alec was hurled away. Lydia closed the doors behind him.

Alec didn't have time to relax as he was shoved against the wall. Meliorn's knife, the one Aline used to carry, was almost pushing open his throat.

"How did you know ?" Meliorn looked furious. There was fear in his eyes, but mostly anger. Lydia was listening to the door but she was closely paying attention to their conversation. Alec was confident she wouldn't let him get killed this way by Meliorn.

"I don't, some cats behave a certain way. Some prefer no eye contact." Alec lied. It was a half-truth. He couldn't tell anyone he had gotten hints from the head gamemaker himself. He couldn't say he… had… _slept_ with him either. Panic twisted his gut. But he couldn't show it. He had to emphasize his credibility. "Church," he let himself lie even more before he could stop himself to think. "It's our institute's cat. He doesn't like it either."

"Liar," Meliorn spat. Alec knew Meliorn was capable of slitting his throat. He stared down at the other tribute.

"It was just a hunch-" He tried again. Meliorn shoved him and Alec wondered if he would have to kill Meliorn in self-defence.

"You are lying through your teeth, Lightwood." Meliorn was calculating whether or not to kill Alec. Alec could see it in his eyes. With luck, Alec could pierce the lung with an arrowhead before Meliorn's knife dragged all the way through his throat.

"Stop it, Alec is telling the truth, we have an ugly cat in the institute. He is very skittish." Lydia's hand rested on Meliorn's wrist. Her tone was commanding. She wouldn't take no for an answer, only retreat. She was better at lying than him. So when Meliorn gauged her truthfulness high enough, he backed away.

He was about to speak when he was suddenly interrupted by a flying axe. Meliorn pushed Alec away. The tribute from 10 disappeared in one of the adjacent rooms. Lydia took hold of her staff and went after her. Alec prepared himself to follow and Meliorn was already on his way until two arms sprung from out of a mirror, or something Alec had first thought was a mirror. They grabbed onto Meliorn and dragged him in. Alec just had the time to see blonde hair before he heard Meliorn scream. He rushed. The mirror was hollow.

Alec made his way inside. There was a whole corridor. One that permitted for anyone to move around between different rooms. Heidi Mckenzie was using Meliorn, who was screaming like hell, as a shield. Her mouth was pressed against his throat. There was blood. Alec could hear Meliorn curse. She had stabbed him from behind. The point of the knife was going all the way through, poking out from his stomach area, right underneath the lung. Alec didn't think twice.

The headshot was clean and straightforward. Heidi didn't even convulse. She just fell dead on the floor. Meliorn slumped down as her body sagged. His hands were on his wound and on his neck. He was sobbing. Alec didn't think twice and ran toward his ally. He shoved the dead body to the side and reached for Meliorn's backpack.

There was still a syringe there; He didn't even think about what a bad decision he was making by saving one of the last remaining tributes.

The injection was clean and well performed. The nanites broke loose and Alec quickly took out the knife before anything wrong could happen. The canon went off, then a second. Alec sprung to his feet. He rushed away, leaving Meliorn behind, who looked so surprised by the healing he was receiving.

Alec noticed immediately which mirror pathway guided him toward the needed room. There was movement in its light. He knew somewhere, he was acting out of panic. But he was focused. He readied another arrow before entering the room.

"Lydia ?" He asked, tense. When his own name came as a reply, he exhaled. He ignored the bashed-in corpse beside Lydia. He went straight to her. He needed to make sure she was alive, unharmed, well. Thank the angels, she was.

They never hugged in district 2. But they did now. He checked her over. She was alright, seemed alright. She looked shaken, panicked, but she was okay, seemed okay.

"Are you bleeding ?" He asked. She shook her head. Unspoken returned him the same question.

"Meliorn got injured but I used a syringe." As he said it, it dawned on him.

" **Three tributes remaining"**

Alec couldn't help but be surprised. Everything became quiet around them. Alec looked at Lydia and vice-versa. There were only three of them left. His two allies and him. 21 tributes were dead. There were no other competitors but themselves. Every single plan and strategy flashed through Alec's mind, every possible betrayal, every possible move. He was going to ask Lydia 'what now ?', but she reacted before he could say anything.

"Meliorn ?" she asked. She walked toward the mirror's entrance. Alec hoped that Lydia knew how ridiculously dangerous it was for her to do so. "Meliorn, come out." She said again.

There was a silence. Had Meliorn bolted away after being healed ? Alec couldn't blame him if he had. There was no certainty whether the request for an alliance would extend until now. "Is it a trap or are we not going to kill each other right away ?" Righteous question. Alec knew Meliorn wouldn't take the chance of being taken by surprise.

"You want to ?" Alec asked. "I believe in equal chances in battle." He took off his bow and threw it inside the mirror room. He glanced at Lydia. Alec had understood she just wanted to try and keep things at peace for just another moment. He couldn't blame his companion. It had been enough stress for one day.

"This is a most unwise decision." Alec raised an eyebrow. He didn't disagree with the tribute from 1. They were all making a decision that would make things harder for all of them. But the adrenaline had died down. Everybody was thinking clearly now. Lydia threw her staff into the room as well. Alec grimaced. It was dangerous. They were now mostly unarmed and Meliorn could turn his cloak on them any second now and they wouldn't be able to defend themselves at the best of their capacities.

There was another moment of silence.

When Meliorn finally appeared, he was guarded, ready to strike. The wound in his neck had stopped bleeding and his abdomen only had blood traces on his torn T-shirt. Alec's treatment had worked and saved his life.

They all stared at each other. This was where most tributes would kill each other. To get it over with, so that all of this would finally end. This was the moment where one of them would finally ascend. But Alec was reminded of the way he had saved Meliorn from the Huntress. How Meliorn had shared his food with Alec and how they had talked, just the two of them, while they were keeping watch. He glanced at Lydia, reminded of their agreement, their promises, their devotion toward each other.

Alec was reminded of the protection, the loyalty, and it was with disgust, awe and guilt that he then looked upon the biggest mistake they all had made during the games:

Friendship.

And Alec felt his heart weep.

He couldn't talk and neither did Meliorn. He would always break silences at the right moments or make a quip that would make Alec roll his eyes at. Lydia stayed quiet. Her sudden idea of peace was weighing heavy on all of them.

" **Announcement: dear tributes,**

**In the biggest room, in the highest tower, on the highest floor**

**A feast is awaiting you,**

**A feast for you all to divide equally among you,**

**A feast for the ones who hunger,**

**A feast for the ones who fight,**

**A feast for the ones who believe,**

**A last meal before the crowning of eternal change."**

It had been three years since the last feast. Jordan Kyle had ripped everyone to shreds by setting off a device that he had created from the chandeliers and swords found in the arena. He had then attacked the tributes one by one with a fist weapon. It had been a slaughter. Alec still remembered how he had preferred to get some food during that scene. Individual deaths were of little value, they weren't interesting to analyse. But Alec understood now: taking out a group was easier because it just sped up the games. There were less faces to remember, names and screams that would haunt you. Jordan Kyle hadn't stayed to watch if he had been successful in triggering his trap and Alec now understood why.

He followed Lydia mechanically. Meliorn chose to walk beside him instead of behind. It wasn't logical for them to still be as focused as they were. Throwing a mutation at them now would defeat the purpose of having a 'final round', but the stress of these past few days couldn't just be blinked away. Alec felt the _need_ to make sure the perimeter was safe. Even though he _knew_ that the biggest dangers to his life were walking beside him.

There were portraits and more stained glass. And somehow the colours changed the higher they climbed into the castle. The strangest part was that sometimes Alec had the feeling they were walking up while the stairs were pointing down and so forth. Hallways changed once you didn't look at them anymore and when Lydia finally opened the door of the highest tower, on the highest floor, Alec could only breathe in relief. They didn't talk to each other. There was no place for light banter anymore. The tension between all of them was high and every moment spent in silence weighed heavy on their consciousness.

It was more bare than anything Alec would have imagined. There was a small table, dressed for three, with three backpacks on it, and chairs. A bit of light from a chandelier made it look like an intimate family dinner had been organised in the room. There was even a lit fireplace. Alec kept his initial rage at bay, not quite understanding where it was coming from. They had a chance to dine, recover some strength, get themselves prepared for when the games resumed. And yet, and yet Alec was so angry.

Meliorn was the first one to sit down to examine the content of the 'feast'. There were no weapons or medicine, there was only food. "They have gifted us those star shaped fruits, quite the treat isn't it ?" Meliorn didn't take long before emptying his backpack. Alec joined him once he started to smell the warm salty food. He was hungry. Every thought was replaced by the idea of finally having something else in his stomach than the dried piece of bread and the chocolate.

Everything came in small containers. They all laid out everything on the table before one of them even remotely touched or ate anything from the food. They were used to not having enough, to waiting, to not letting themselves go. Even the way Meliorn positioned the food on the table. It was to _share,_ even if they had all the same backpack containing the exact same amount of food. They all sat down, not sure when to start.

Alec's eyes settled upon the bottles on the table. He got up and poured from one of his bottles into every glass. Lydia first, then Meliorn and himself. Lydia then got up and shared her soup. Meliorn cut his fruit. He then took the other backpack, the one from the cornucopia. He dug around and took out a battered container. Upon forcing the lid open, Alec could see the small fish shaped cakes. There were 4 left. Meliorn put one cake in each of their plates and left the last one in its container.

They didn't toast, they didn't cheer. But they ate. Not in silence, they talked about food, about their favourite things about it. Alec drank twice. His throat had been aching so much he couldn't have resisted the thirst even if he had wanted to, his lips had split and bled because of the dehydration. There were comments about his growing beard, about Lydia's dirty hair, about Meliorn's growing infected scar which had finally healed thanks to Alec's injection. They kept the conversation light and to the surface. Nothing deep, nothing that would hurt.

And yet.

And yet after no talk of tomorrow, nor one of battle and when the food was eaten, Lydia got up. They had all been dancing around the silence. They all knew it. She was about to talk but Meliorn interrupted her.

"Just a few more moments, Lydia. One more night." He didn't sound pleading. But the request was clear. He smiled. Not the usual smirk that showed his wit. It was the one smile he almost never showed, the utterly sincere one that removed the veils from any possible lies or half-truths he would tell.

Lydia bowed her head. She was avoiding their gazes. "If you wish so. I-I don't mind sleeping besides either of you." She added. Her hands were starting to fidget. She hid them behind her back. "But I'm going for a walk. I-" she breathed, she tried to keep a focused look on her face but Alec could see the cracks. She was breaking from the inside. She didn't want them to know. "I need it."

"Please don't let us keep you," said Meliorn as he got up. He started to clean up the table immediately when Lydia had turned herself to go.

Alec watched Lydia walk away. He didn't know what exactly his companion was feeling, he didn't know if she was angry or sad. Or even frustrated. He didn't know and he didn't know how to feel about it either. Lydia needed her space. He shook his head to keep any other thoughts away from his head. He helped Meliorn and set up camp next to the fireplace. They had received a quilt from a sponsor so Alec and Meliorn shared it to sit on.

Alec didn't know when exactly he had fallen asleep. It was in the middle of a conversation with Meliorn. His eyelids had suddenly become heavy. He fell asleep and could remember the sound of the fire before he sunk into a dreamless sleep. He started to seep back into consciousness. But something was off. The hairs of his neck were raised.

His eyes shot open and he avoided Meliorn's knife by mere inches. He rolled over. Meliorn grabbed him by the hair. Alec's battle instincts kicked into gear. Anything was good to punch or put distance between him and his attacker. His knuckles hit Meliorn's nose. Meliorn staggered back and Alec took the opportunity to get on his feet. His bow was too far away. That had been a mistake. He shouldn't have let his guard down. He was unarmed and Meliorn was not. Alec moved in even before Meliorn could try and stab him again. Meliorn switched their positions. Alec's back slammed against the wall. He kept his hands out, trying to keep the knife at bay.

He wasn't used to this kind of close combat. He wasn't good at it either, certainly when he was unarmed. Meliorn's skull connected with his forehead and Alec became dizzy. He feigned to fall unconscious. Just enough for Meliorn to let his guard down. Alec grabbed his wrist and made his face collide with the wall. Alec had the upper hand. He held Meliorn captive in an armlock. Meliorn let go of the knife. It clattered to the floor.

Alec was about to speak when Meliorn then unsheathed a dagger from Alec's pocket.

It was intuitive. A sparring move of self-defence, Alec had been used doing it for years now. But never with real weapons. Never with real damage as a result. Not like this. Alec had intercepted the taking of the dagger and had turned Meliorn around. Meliorn had been deceptive, had feigned, just like Alec had. He had tricked him and Alec would have never seen it coming even if he had known of it. Alec would even have groaned in pain if he could. If it hadn't been for the hand on his wrist. It was crunching, heated, Alec didn't seem to be able to let it go. The panic made him tense up even. He looked in horror toward the dagger that was currently lodged into Meliorn's chest. He hadn't wanted this; only to disarm, not this.

He tried to release the dagger but Meliorn didn't let him.

Blood was starting to soak his hand.

He tried again, his eyes were wide and panic was seeping into his brain. It didn't take any further analysis from either of them to conclude that Meliorn had only a few minutes left to live before he'd bleed out.

"Don't you dare, Alec, don't you dare." The grip made Alec's hand tingle. Meliorn was pinching a nerve. Alec glared. Meliorn's hand in his hair held Alec in place. Meliorn would have the strength to tackle them both over if he wanted to. There was nowhere for Alec to go to. Meliorn kept Alec's hand on the dagger. The horror of the situation shattered his adrenaline. He started to feel cold sweat appear on his brow. He tried to retract his hand but Meliorn didn't let him, if anything, it drove the dagger deeper down.

And Alec realised Meliorn's intent; his motivation; what had driven Meliorn to strike now and the way he had fought. He looked into Meliorn's eyes and Alec's heart sank. He shook his head. His voice ran dry in his throat.

"No," his voice hurt, it was sore. It was painful to even speak. His throat was constricted to the point where he wasn't sure he would be able to talk anymore. "It's fucked up, this is fucked up." He repeated it several times. He couldn't disengage. Meliorn had him trapped. He looked down at Meliorn, unable to stop the despair from showing on his face.

"You don't get to choose, Lightwood. The situation was clear : either I tried now, or I didn't." Meliorn was in pain. His voice was cracking.

"You could have fought. You could have taken the chance. You could have won." Alec gritted through his teeth. He shook his head. And yet Meliorn's grip was still firm on his wrist. The hand in his hair was still buried in his scalp. Alec felt anger coil in his gut. His hatred toward Meliorn rose like oil on fire. He didn't deserve this. Alec didn't deserve this and it made him want to scream.

"Your eyes." Alec locked eyes with Meliorn and Alec felt his grip on the dagger fade. The time was ticking away. It was no use. It was Meliorn's last wish. Meliorn tried to smile. But it looked like a grimace. The smell of blood, the wetness of it. It wasn't like Alec could hear it drip on the floor. It flowed too much. "Your eyes would have been prettier if they had been different," Alec frowned. The hand in his hair loosened. "You would have been way prettier if you had been a girl."

Alec let go of the dagger. He put his hands on the wall, breathing through his teeth, letting his head hang low. "I have a sister," he muttered. He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to watch. He didn't want to stay. He didn't want to talk.

"I bet she looks beautiful." Meliorn's attempt at humour was just sour. Alec punched the wall. Not hard enough to incapacitate or break the skin of his hand, but enough to hurt. He looked down at Meliorn.

"This isn't fair, Meliorn. This isn't fair at all." Meliorn convulsed. Alec pushed him against the wall to lead him to the ground. They were sitting in blood. Alec tried not to care. Even when Meliorn's hand crept on his cheek.

"I want it to be you, Alec. Promise me you'll win." His voice was breaking, his breathing was irregular. Alec inhaled, closed his eyes, pushed his face into Meliorn's palm. There was almost no strength behind it. It pierced Alec's heart, dug its way deep into the base of his feelings.

"She is my friend." Alec whispered. He felt his hands itch. The blood on his knees was starting to feel cold though his trousers. He took hold of Meliorn's wrist. There was blood on it as well. He had probably smeared some on Alec's cheeks. Alec wanted to look away. But he didn't. He'd face it like he had so many times before. He'd find a strength to continue.

"I know." Meliorn's sigh was so ragged. It wouldn't take long now. Alec had started to understand what dying sounded like. Alec folded Meliorn's hand against his chest.

"I wanted to poison you. Ever since you killed Kaelie." The colour was leaving his face. Alec knew it wouldn't take long now so he let Meliorn talk. "But there is something about you." Alec didn't ask, nor questioned. He didn't respond. Meliorn had a small scoff. Blood was at the edge of his lips.

"I'm cold."

Alec's throat was parched. Meliorn didn't close his eyes and still looked at Alec. Alec didn't know what to do so he just looked at Meliorn until his facial expression became unfocused, until every limb felt frozen, until the blood underneath him would never be able to be washed away again.

Alec noticed that the canon went off a minute too late. They didn't always fire the cannons right when a tribute died. There was often a small waiting time. Alec let go of Meliorn's hand. He felt past the breakdown. Past the pain. Past the horror. He stood up. Like he had, so many times before.

"What happened ?" Lydia's voice was hard. She looked down at the corpse. Alec turned toward her. She had left the door open. An escape route if needed. He couldn't blame her. She was frowning. He probably looked cold. - He felt cold, detached, wet - Hopefully the blood was going to dry soon. What had seeped through the fabric had already started to crackle off on his skin.

"He attacked me, wanted to get it over with. He…" Alec inhaled. The curtain between him and the world was yet again raised. "He said it was now or never. We were just resting." He didn't recognise the sound of his own voice but Lydia was nodding. There wasn't anything more to say.

Lydia approached. She extended her hand to him. She didn't smile but her tone was calm and composed, you could even mistake it for excitement. Alec knew better. There was assurance and focus, maybe curiosity. But there was no excitement. There would never be excitement. They were both past that. "Alec, you don't understand. This is an opportunity, this is what we wanted. Us against them. You and I together, a fair fight. "

"I-"The hesitance in his voice made Lydia frown. She grabbed his bloodied hand. The 'L' on his ring gleamed. A reminder of why he was here. A reminder of home. The 'home' he wanted to go back to.

"The law is the law Alec, we chose this. We both agreed to this."

Heavy was the burden of the bearer of the Lightwood family name, heavy was the duty to become the rightful victor of the games of hunger, heavy was the crown to birth the legacy his family was due, heavy was the price of ascension.

"You're right." He agreed. His resolve strengthened itself. He tightened his hand around Lydia's. He looked down at her. She understood. Like no other, she would. She was standing tall and proud. Her eyes, her determination. She was more than a companion, she was more than an ally. She was a sister.

"See you at sunrise," he said, knowing that before they'd part, they would carve a keepsake in each other's skin: a reminder, a gift, a promise; a token of kindness. Everything that would remind themselves of one another.

She grabbed onto him, smirking.

"Let's give them a show to remember."


	27. Chapter 9 Day 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've added end notes. Thank you for everyone who has read this fic until the end. It's been a real pleasure to update this fic every tuesday for the past months. I can't lie that I'm very emotional today, I poured my heart out in this fic and I hope this ending lives up to the passion I had for this fic. I'll ask you check out the trigger warnings one last time if you think you'll need it. This ending embodies the 'Hurt no Comfort' so be careful when you proceed. Thank you for reading.

_It's a floating sensation. One where he is walking, squinting at the grey sun looking over district 2. He is on the roof of the institute. There are no drones, no surveillance. There isn't anyone down there either. It's a straight line, the line he is walking on. One direction. There is nothing behind him, no pathway, no point of origin. His body is as light as a feather. One step after the other. The sound of his steps on the pavement echoes._

_His hands, they are painted black._

_It's the colour of traitors._

_He keeps on walking. The edge of the roof draws closer and closer with every movement, with every step. There is wind in his hairs, going through his clothes. He doesn't feel his body. He does not feel his limbs. He walks on. He doesn't stop. He feels the sting in his chest. His T-shirt coats red. Blood seeps through. Its acrid scent fills every sensation, every emotion, every thought. He stops at the edge._

_His hands dig in his flesh, through his bones. There is nothing there, no heart, just nothing. The black mixes with the red._

_He falls forward, over the edge, into the void._

_May he land dead and be gone forever._

* * *

Alec opened his eyes. The red sun had gone down and come up again. Its ray of light was shimmering through the stained glass with Alicante's coat of arms. His last day in the arena was one where he would wake up alone, his head heavy and his limbs stiff.

He sat up. The sting in his abdomen almost jolted him back down. He didn't wince. The wound had closed well. He brushed his fingers over his eyes, massaging them awake. There was tension all over his body. He scratched his days-worth of unwashed hair, his body felt so filthy and covered with grime. He probably smelled as bad as he looked. He took the time to evaluate his new mark. Given the circumstances, he was fortunate to not have had any infections in his time here, since that had been the most prevalent reason why a tribute didn't make it to the end. It remained to be determined if he was going to keep all of his limbs until the end.

He had to get up. The sun was rising.

He reached out for the now cold soup in his backpack. It didn't taste good, but it didn't taste bad either. The spices were bland, the vegetables sloppy and watered down. He tore off one piece from the now hard loaf. He ate one piece of fruit before he warmed up his body with some sit-ups and a few push ups. Enough to get a heart rate up and help him gain focus. He drank his last gourd of water empty and dry and stared at the stained glass. There was nothing outside anymore. The arena had vanished. There was no forest. There were no hills nor houses. There was nothing. It was all a black void.

He searched his pockets. He had already emptied them before he went to sleep, but he still found a piece of candy hidden within. It was an orange candy. He stared at it, maybe for a bit too long. He put it back in his pocket. He reached for his witchlight and secured it away inside a piece of cloth around his belt. He put on his T-shirt that he had been using as a pillow. Everything was set. There wasn't anything else for him to do. He grabbed his bow and quiver.

The hallways hadn't shifted like they previously had. Alec could track his way back to the rendezvous point of the day. He fastened his quiver on his back. His pace was slow. He let his senses adjust, and took in the details one last time. He ascended stairs, took turns, entered rooms and hallways. The cat creature had not been seen again. The silence in his head was so loud. He didn't let himself think. Nor linger. He couldn't. The moment he would stop, everything would act like poison. He forced himself to feel, but not to think. No veils, no curtains. He needed to be focused. He needed what remained of Alexander Lightwood, so he could… do this.

Stairs up, stairs down again. He had his bow at the ready even if he knew nothing and no-one would attack him before planned. They liked their suspense. They liked their drama. It twisted his gut to wonder how much they had bet on him or Lydia. It didn't feel like a game. It felt like the fulfilling of a destiny, a competition to be won, a name to be made. And yet. And yet he felt he narrowed his mind just to think straight. This was what he had come to do. To win. To become who he was and trained to be, to become who he always wanted to be, to be this soldier who can follow orders, to be the hand, judge and executioner. Because the law had laid down that every district had to take responsibility. Everyone had to pay for the gravity of their crimes against Lilith and the empire of Idris.

It was the law and the law was hard.

This was the greatest honour, the greatest elevation, an ascension. To become a symbol of righteousness, bravery, discipline. He was a man rising to godhood. He would become part of Alicante and end the hunger of his family.

He felt his chest rise, the boldness, the confidence finally put his restless mind at peace. He had got this. He had the skills, the tenure. If he perished today, it would be against someone he had the deepest respect and love for. Lydia was the strongest opponent, the strongest warrior. She was everything.

He stopped in front of the door.

He inhaled, trying to settle his focus back into the here and now.

The door opened softly. Alec wondered if Lydia would have trapped the room. It wasn't her style, but you never knew. He pushed the door hard and hid behind the wall. Nothing had activated a trip wire. It was completely silent.

Alec was used to fighting now. His instincts were on alert. Still nothing. He frowned. It didn't feel like he was waiting for something to happen. It didn't feel like a hunt or a wait to see who would move before the other would.

He readied an arrow and threw caution into the wind. He rolled into the room, ready to track movement, let his arrow fly. His momentum was immediately torn away when he laid eyes on… Nothing. The room was empty. No chairs, no table, only the lone chandelier that was still illuminating the room. Lydia wasn't here.

Alec bit the inside of his cheek, had she given up? Or had she not yet arrived? He was ready to head out again, until he noticed the trap door in the ceiling. It was hidden next to the doorframe. It was open. One look told Alec it was a way toward the outside. He could see the clouds and a small breeze was sucking the air out of the room. Lydia must have chosen to go that way. An open space was more advantageous than the room they had elected to fight.

But Alec didn't hoist himself up. Instead he looked around to the nearest window. If he was Lydia he would have the trap door under scrutiny. And since Lydia still had her staff, she was more ready for close combat more than Alec ever would be. He broke the window with his elbow. The glass shattered. Cold wind gushed into the room. It made him shiver. The glass wasn't as thick as he thought it would be, most of it had broken from the mere smash of his elbow. He stuck his head out. The roof wasn't that far up. He could use the ornaments to easily climb the wall. It was still a leap of faith. Unless the gamemakers were going to play around with the black fog that was at the bottom of the castle, he could safely hoist himself up through the window.

The intensity of the burn made Alec wonder if he would make it. The strain of it permeated his muscles. It left him impossibly breathless. The worst was when he felt the wound on his stomach tear. It would become an ugly scar. He shook his head in frustration. This was nothing compared to what he had had to endure during training at the institute. He had endured worse, far worse. This was just a physical obstacle, nothing like the beatings nor the punishment he would endure. He gritted his teeth and when he finally made it to the top, he was shaking.

The roof was an open space, with several columns and pillars placed all around to give chances for cover. There was nothing else. Once one of them would take advantage of the perimeter and this new arena, the fight wouldn't be able to last long. The sun was more yellow than red. He tried to breathe through his nose to not give away his position. Lydia was indeed next to the trap door, waiting. She had shed her red robe.

Alec inhaled. He had caught his breath. He was ready. He clicked an arrow in the arrow rest. He tensed and focused.

He shot his arrow. The explosion sprawled Lydia a few meters further away. She was quicker on her feet than expected. He ducked behind a pillar for cover. The explosive arrows he had gotten the night before were far more destructive than Alec would have imagined. He was impressed. Of course he was familiar with this kind of weaponry. But that had been in controlled environments. It was different when the explosions were actually real. He clicked another arrow in its rest. He shot the pillar. The explosion made Lydia duck, her staff helping in the process. She was calculating the point of origin of the arrow.

It was time for him to make himself known. He moved into plain sight and shot another arrow. The pillar Lydia was hiding behind went down. He readied another arrow.

"You're late," she said once she caught a glimpse of him. Alec tracked her. She hadn't moved yet.

"I needed my beauty sleep," he joked. Hopefully Alicante liked his sense of humour. Because it would be all they ever get from him. He fired another arrow at the base. The root of the pillar exploded in pieces. Lydia took advantage of the dust and scraps to hide behind the pillar on the left. So far so good.

"How many do you have of those ?" she asked. Her voice carried over the sound of the rubble going down. He was down to 2 arrows for the explosive ones.

"If I told you, it wouldn't be fun, would it ?" He clicked in a regular arrow. It would throw her off. He saw right on time when Lydia appeared to throw a dagger at him. He hid. He moved quickly to another pillar. Lydia was moving forward while throwing, which drove him into hiding.

She never missed. So when a dagger fell at his feet he pretended to be surprised. But he wasn't. She wanted an equal fight just as much as he did.

"Thanks for the dagger," he grinned. How long would they be able go for before the gamemakers would intervene ? How long before one of them would make a mistake ? How long before one of them would falter ?

"Come out, Alec, you know I'll have the upper-hand in no time." He moved away. She was coming closer. "You just have to run out of arrows. And what happens then ?"

They were playing it up. Hopefully Alicante could believe it. The friends who finally became rivals. Set to fight each other one last time until one of them won. "I'll hit you before that."

Once in close combat Alec wouldn't be able to best Lydia. He knew that. She knew that. If she still had her staff before he ran out of arrows, he'd be beaten in no time. This is why he had to tire her, injure her, because he wouldn't have an equal chance otherwise. He dared to come into her line of sight. She didn't throw him a dagger immediately. He shot his arrow.

It bounced right off her.

Alec froze. But Lydia's motion for throwing another knife made him move. The weapon clunked against the pillar he hid behind. She was wearing body armour. He breathed in and out, resting his head against the cold stone. The weak point of such kind of armour was the head. It didn't cover the head or the hands. He felt the veil rise, the curtain between him and the world.

The only way to injure Lydia was to shoot her straight in between her eyes.

He bit the inside of his cheek. He had to calm his breathing, regain his focus. He readied the two explosive arrows. He needed a distraction because she was coming closer and closer. This was not how it was supposed to go. He shot them at her feet. The dust, the rubble. She had protected her face. Alec circled her. He dismissed his bow and took the dagger in hand.

She parried him. Once, twice. He felt the end of her bow staff in his abdomen. It hurt he staggered back. He lunged at her, ready to take another parrying blow.

At the last moment Alec saw she wasn't going to.

Body armour didn't stop cold weapons. Her staff fell to the floor.

And Alec's heart sank.

"Lydia," he was trembling, putting her dirty hair out of her face. He couldn't look at her wound. "What did you do Lydia ?" ' _you could have dodged. You could have prevented this'_ was dry and empty on his lips. He could see she was understanding what he was saying. Her smile was weak. This wasn't meant to go this way. The fight should have dragged out, tired them, thrilled them, worked them into adrenaline. Until even the gamemakers were tired of seeing them fight. This wasn't how things were done, how they had agreed wordlessly. This wasn't what was supposed to happen.

"Looks like you were better than me." She was shaking, convulsing. Alec helped her to the ground. He couldn't talk. A victor was proven, chosen, fought for. It was the law, it was how it was meant to be. They had to fight to get to this very moment. It was what he had come here to do. He shoved his emotions away. He closed his face.

"The law is hard, but it is the law, Alec." Alec felt his heart strain. He didn't know what to feel. He shouldn't let himself get drained, he shouldn't let himself let go. _'Rule with your head, not emotions.'_ This was nothing. This was supposed to not make him feel anything. And yet this wasn't what this was about. She had done this deliberately. She hadn't fought. He wasn't better than her. They weren't equals. Not like this. She had given up. Let him get the upper hand. This wasn't the law, not the one he had lived for. This was _nothing_ like what he had lived for. It was deception. It was a lie.

"But it doesn't make it right." He wanted to deny it. He wanted to say 'no'. But he couldn't dismiss her last words. He couldn't dismiss what she said.

He couldn't. And yet his mind suddenly understood, the lies, the wrongness, the deceit. He hadn't thought of it. He hadn't seen it that way. He hadn't understood. He hadn't seen this happening the way it had happened. He hadn't thought of when he was actually going to be the one victorious. He had wished he would. He had wished he could. But not this way.

Because this didn't feel like a victory, it felt like a loss.

This wasn't worth it. This had never been worth it. This wasn't what they had promised to him. This wasn't the ascension they had betrothed to him. This wasn't what he had wanted. This feeling, this sensation. It wasn't the salvation they had promised him. It wasn't the fulfilling of the law, or it was. But it was wrong. He clutched at Lydia's shoulders. The pain in his heart, it cut, it made him bleed, it made him die. Nothing could make this right. Nothing would ever make this right. Nothing would ever correct what he did. Nothing would ever undo what he had done. Nothing would make her come to life again.

He shook, no tears to spend and no emotion greater than his pain. But yet, as he finally closed his eyes, finally muttering the prayer he was already too late to make, it was the least he could do. The least he could let himself do. The least he could do before he would end what was left of him later.

"Atque in pepetuum, soror, ave atque vale. May you rest in peace and your valour be true. You are free, now."

" **All Hail, Alexander Lightwood, district 2, victor of the hunger games."**


	28. Epilogue

"Alec, how exciting to see you here again. How does it feel to finally be crowned a victor?" Tessa tossed her hair to the side. Her smile was illuminating the room with its mere presence. Alec sat back and crossed his legs, relaxed. He had one arm on the backrest of the couch he was sitting on.

"Well, it's a relief, 13 days in the arena was, to say the least, a bit straining. At least I have the possibility to shower here." He tossed a smirk and the audience laughed. He was in a playful mood tonight.

* * *

" _Don't take them away, please." He tossed, tried to fight, he had heard a bone break. There was blood from a nose dripping down his hand. There were five of them on him, restraining him. He had no way out. He was screaming, crying. Everything hurt. The weights on his hands. The blood loss of his slit wrists. He couldn't even feel the numbness anymore._

" _Don't take them away. Leave them on." He pleaded again. His voice was hoarse of the screams and sobs. A needle sank deep within his arm. Everything went black._

* * *

"What do you think you have accomplished by participating in this year's games ?" The inquiry was making everyone quiet. Alec frowned, thinking of how to reply to the question.

"Well I must say, even if at first I was sceptical of how the arena looked, and the aesthetic of it was a bit, to say the least, bizarre; I think I was able to deliver an interesting take on the games. The puzzles were less my thing but it was an environment that was scary and fitted perfectly for the kind of tribute line-up we had." He looked at the audience, everyone approved of his words.

Tessa nodded with enthusiasm: "It was gorgeous, wasn't it ?"

"I think we can all agree that these were the kind of games to be remembered." The cheers from the audience accompanied his words.

* * *

_The hand on his face made him look up from the hospital bed. "Listen up, Alec, don't accept the yin fen." Alec couldn't exactly see Hodge but he recognised his voice. The urge, the blue eyes. Had Hodge always looked so emotional ? "Don't accept the yin fen, you hear me, kid ? Don't accept the yin fen."_

* * *

"So Alec, you promised us all something once you were a victor of the games, do you remember what it was?" Tessa sat back, her eyes were glinting with mischief.

Alec raised his eyebrows. He didn't actually remember: "Something tells me you will remind me."

She gestured her hand in front of her face and pointed toward her diamond ring. It was her wedding band.

"Ah, yes of course." Alec nodded. "As I said, it's the Lightwood family ring. I crafted it with Jace at the same time as we crafted his family ring. The originals had both been lost." The audience was immediately intrigued.

"This ring is very important to me. It reminded me of home. And…" he gestured toward the audience, some women had the replicas of his marks embedded in their skins. "It helped me to bring something to the games. Something never seen before." The clapping was approving and content humming echoed through the room.

* * *

_His breath was shallow and through his nose, he couldn't move. His eyes were closed but he was aware of his surroundings. He simply couldn't react to his environment. The beeping sound of the monitor echoed the sound of his heart. There were people talking next to him._

" _What are you requesting us to do, Sir ? Should he keep the scars ?" The doctor who was treating him sounded impressed by the newly arrived guest._

" _They are the result of a badly performed screening for weapons." He recognised the voice. Its deep drawl, its accent, its warmth. "I'm not certain it will give a good example to follow."_

* * *

"So what would you tell the tributes who want to volunteer next year ?" Alec fell silent. He scratched his bottom lip with his finger. He looked up at the platform, knowing that the most important people of Alicante were looking down at him for a reply.

* * *

_They share a glance. Cat eyes, meeting his. He doesn't look away. The speech is brief and honours him and the crown is light and golden. Alec doesn't look anywhere else but at the man who is at the back of the small crowd around him. He is torn, hate, grief, relief, happiness, sadness. He feels it all._

_And yet he can't look away._

* * *

"As a proud and honoured victor of district 2, I've only got one thing to say:" The audience is hanging on his lips.

"I'm the happiest I've ever been my whole life. The games, they aren't just the games, they make every single one of your dreams come true."

The standing ovation resonated and the audience rose to cheer him on.

And Alec understood why Mark Blackthorn had killed himself.


	29. End Notes

So here we are, the end of this adventure.

It's been, a ride ? A ride that I have personally enjoyed writing every single step of the way. I have written these notes when I had just finished writing this story so I'm going to leave you people to it :

_"In the wake of finally having finished this first story I reflect a bit on the reasons why I wrote this. The main reason for me to construct all of this was spite. I had been wanting to read a hunger games Alternate Universe for Shadowhunters but the two stories I read didn't give me what I wanted or went so against what I wanted to read. For me the trauma wasn't present or wasn't handled in the way I wanted it to be, people were sorted in wrong districts, the world building didn't fit with what I wanted and so forth._

_When I determined what I did want for this story. I reflected on what kind of writer I was : I'm the type of writer who likes to write what isn't out there yet or not enough of. I cater to rarepairs and the type of stories that involve overlooked characters, or kinks for that matter. I like all kinds of prose and media. I write what I want to read more than what I am enjoying to write._

_This brings me to the topic of trauma. I wanted something that explored the horror of the games, its implications, its nature. Something that we weren't able to explore in the actual trilogy because you're living it through the eyes of Katniss who comes from district 12. So what would be the opposite of Katniss Everdeen ? Alec Lightwood, district 2 was my direct response. A career tribute who participates in the games with a head full of propaganda and delusions. I did however not just want a serial killer trope, I still wanted to keep a morality I could understand where it was coming from (and having it shift and evolve)._

_As a writer I wanted to put myself to the challenge and explore how to write something that was the development of trauma/PTSD, the reason for that is purely objective. It's a challenge and helps to stretch skills. Is this the best depiction of the development of trauma/PTSD ? No I think if I were to write this stories 5 years from now it would look different, and it might be even more accurate, but less accurate if I were to write this 10 years from then ect._

_Which comes to my next point, trauma porn, I absolutely didn't want to write trauma porn. I hate reading it, I hate watching it, I hate everything about it. It's why I tried not to make things explicitly focused on gore or focused on making the scenes long for the sake of word count. When someone died, they would die quickly. I of course want to address the disposable woman trope. Which I absolutely wanted to avoid. But I also like strong female protagonists. This is the hunger games and the lead is Alec Lightwood. Girls/women were going to die. So I especially worked on fleshing them out. Even if Alec doesn't have the finer details because this story bathes in the unreliable narrator trope I wanted something that would make me able to retell this story from the perspective of every single other tribute things would align on how Alec was seeing things and sometimes there would be disparity. In the end I guess the one that I could the least flesh out through Alec's eyes is Maia._

_What about the ending ? Well this story also revolved around that one sex scene of tribute Alec and head gamemaker Magnus. Because I just wanted the two of them to bone and as always things escalated. I, however, still want a love story between them. But for plot reasons it couldn't happen now, not in this installment. I really hope to be able to write further and write a part 2 that will focus on the aftermath of the games and the consequences of Alec and Magnus sleeping together. There had been long speculations for me and my betas on how to end this story, for long I had kept in mind to just not write day 13 of the arena. Because I didn't gauge it necessary for everyone to know how Alec was going to kill his best friend. Everyone knew it was going to happen. But in the end everyone decided against it. It would make everything very emotionally loaded. Because the epilogue was supposed to stay vague and bitter sweet no matter what. Reason why the main tag for this fic was also 'hurt no comfort'. Because at the end there is no comfort for Alec, there never was supposed to be, as there wasn't for Katniss. For me this was also the main message of the Suzanne Collins' books whose ending has haunted me forever:_

" _My children, who don't know they play on a graveyard._

_Peeta says it will be okay. We have each other. And the book. We can make them understand in a way that will make them braver. But one day I'll have to explain about my nightmares. Why they came. Why they won't ever really go away."_

_I really hope that this fic lived up to certain expectations even if it weren't all of them."_

As an extra edit to this note I want to say this:

I can successfully announce that the second part will be called : The Price of Your Greed and that I have started outlining it. I really hope to be able to share part 2 in the wake of 2021 and I hope it will live up to this first part

So here is a call for you, readers of this fic, if you liked this fic, let me know. Since I'm currently in the middle of outlining The Price of Your Greed and if there is anything you'd want to know or would want to happen in Alec's future and aftermath of his time in the arena. Please tell me and I can consider writing about it next to what I have already planned.

Thank you so much for your readership, time and investment.

I am glad I was able to share this story with all of you.

Greetings,  
Shiva Adler

**Author's Note:**

> If you're over 18 and wanna hang out with other people who love Shadowhunters (I'm there too) come check out the [Hunter's Moon](https://discord.gg/RhZPtsd)
> 
> If you're mostly into Malec I'm also hanging out in the 16+ [Malec Discord Server](https://discord.gg/p54wFch)


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